How do I explore the reasons behind being hypersensitive to trivial matters?

Hello! Recently, many people around me have become ill. Everyone has different symptoms and is reacting differently to the unknown of the coronavirus.

I get it. You're in a bad mood. The illness is uncomfortable, and the worry is making it worse.

So, don't worry about whether any of your current reactions are appropriate. There's no need to be too hard on yourself.

As you said, it's just a normal everyday conversation. There's nothing wrong with it, and neither of you has any problems. You both care about each other with love, and that's what's important.

If you're dwelling on this trivial matter, it's because you're not feeling well, you're in a bad mood, you're seeing everything negatively, and you're projecting it onto the outside world, where you think everything is wrong. Believe in yourself. This is your protective mechanism. The more upset you are outside, the better you'll feel inside.

This is why when we're feeling down, the more people try to comfort us, the more we get annoyed. I'm in so much pain, why are you so happy?

Or you could say, "I'm not feeling well, and I'd appreciate your help."

This is also a chance to tune in to yourself and see if you typically have trouble asking for help from others. If this is something you tend to do, you can work on changing it by making the most of this opportunity.

Asking for help is a skill, too!

I hope you feel better soon!

Hello, dear questioner!

I totally get where you're coming from. Your feelings are totally valid. I think it's a pretty normal reaction.

I took a moment to reflect on myself. She is my good friend, so I would expect something from a good friend, wouldn't you? For example, care, consideration, comfort, etc.

I'm sorry to say that I don't feel comforted or considered in what you say. I can understand why you feel this way, and I empathize with you. Do I understand you correctly, and do you feel similarly to me?

Oh, like that episode I watched the other day! When you've got a stomachache, they say to drink more water.

For a cold and fever, the answer is: drink plenty of water. Does that mean drinking plenty of water is a cure-all?

And also, they ordered you to drink boiled water! It's really not as good as bringing the medicine over or boiling the water or asking with concern, "How are you feeling now? What do you need me to do? Do you need to go to the hospital?"

It's totally understandable that you're feeling this way. It's not like you got these expectations from your best friend, so it's no wonder they've aroused some negative emotions.

I really feel for you, but you still feel that there is something wrong with you. You are doing a great job exploring your own problems in depth, though.

My dear, you deserve to be treated well and loved by those around you.

As your good friend, you can absolutely ask her for what you need. If she's too casual to think of what you need from her, you can definitely mention it. That's what good friends are for!

You can also have a good, heart-to-heart talk with her about how you really feel. If good friends have a gap between them and neither of them says anything, they will drift apart and the relationship will grow cold, right?

I love you, dear, and I'm sending you lots of healing energy!

Good day, To whom it may concern,

From your description, it seems that the primary reason for your dislike of communicating with your colleague is his apparent hypocrisy and a perceived lack of tangible actions or genuine concern. This has led to a sense of disconnection and discomfort during conversations.

The above is merely a conjecture. It is plausible that your emotional aversion stems from your current state of illness and the associated impatience and negative emotions. It is not uncommon to experience negative emotions and concerns when one is unwell or confronted with irritating circumstances.

Improvement strategies:

[1] Become aware of your negative emotions.

When we experience these thoughts and emotions, it is not always clear why they arise. However, we can take steps to understand them better. One approach is to become more aware of our negative emotions and identify the underlying reasons for them. If this is not possible, it is still possible to accept the emotions and express them in a constructive manner.

[2] Set reasonable boundaries and foster positive relationships.

Regardless of the nature of our relationships, whether they be friendships, romantic partnerships, or familial ties, it is imperative to establish reasonable boundaries. These boundaries should be based on a mutual understanding of how to interact in a way that is comfortable for both parties, without infringing on the other's space or allowing others to encroach upon our personal space. By doing so, we can significantly reduce the likelihood of encountering problematic situations.

[3] Identify a reasonable approach to emotional perception.

As an illustration, one may record their current emotions, become aware of them, and consider which words best describe them. Then, one can explore what our subconscious minds are thinking in order to gain insight into our inner emotions and the reassurance our inner children require.

Ultimately, effective interpersonal relationships necessitate an understanding of the underlying reasons for boundaries in our interactions, as well as the emotional and cognitive processes that shape our responses during these interactions. It is essential to be mindful of these internal processes, to investigate their origins, and to seek guidance from external sources when necessary.

It is my hope that the above opinions will prove to be of assistance to you.

Hello! I'll give you a warm hug from afar first.

I'm glad you reached out for help. I hope my input can provide some support and assistance.

I want to tell you that when you feel uncomfortable, especially when it's negative, it's because you have unmet expectations and needs. So, accept that when you feel extremely uncomfortable, you don't want to interact with your friends.

When you feel a strong aversion to someone, it's important to be aware of your inner needs. For example, you may long to be understood, cared for, treated with consideration, respected, and comforted.

It's obvious that your needs weren't met at that moment. When you're not aware of your true inner needs, you may be carried away by your emotions and express them emotionally.

Once you're aware of how you're feeling in the moment, you can respond in a more appropriate way. This means getting along with your emotions, experiencing and feeling your emotions, exploring the real needs hidden behind them, and responding to them in a more appropriate way. For example, you can relieve the intensity of the emotion by taking a deep breath.

For instance, you could tell your colleague how you really feel at that moment. You could tell them what you need from them and how you need their support. This will help you respond to your physical and mental needs in that uncomfortable moment, and it will also help you build a stronger relationship with them. What do you think?

You might want to try keeping an emotional diary, using words to record your emotional feelings. This is a great way to make your emotions visible, expressible, and releaseable. It'll also help you better experience, feel, sort out, and perceive your emotions, and explore the real needs hidden behind them.

I suggest you read "Emotional First Aid" and "Why Are My Emotions Always Controlled by Others?"

I'm Lily, the little listener at the Q&A Pavilion. The world and I love you.