How to maintain a lasting and intimate companionship in daily life?

Hello!

There's absolutely no need to be humble! As the saying goes, "If three people walk together, one can be my teacher." The questioner has a great voice and has had some fantastic friends in the past. They've also been a joy to their parents, right? This is such a beautiful aspect!

The problem you mentioned is something many people, including myself, can relate to. I also went through it, and I'm excited to share how I overcame it!

When we were young, we were trapped in the limitations of our family environment. Our parents were not sociable, had limited horizons, and imposed too many restrictions, so that we missed the opportunity to learn various skills. For example, expressing kindness, getting close to friends, refusing people, dressing up, and so on. There are countless regrets. But, there are also countless opportunities for growth and learning!

Is it all just a matter of regret? Absolutely not!

You might have missed out on a few things, but you've also gained some amazing things along the way! Things like your studies and your character.

Life is full of surprises! Some people start their family before they start their career, some start their career before they start their family, some have a bitter life before a sweet one, and some have a sweet life before a bitter one. There are countless examples of lives that defy the norm, and yours can too!

There's absolutely no need to regret the scenery you've missed out on! What's important is to be clear about what you don't want to miss in the future. The "lasting and intimate companionship" mentioned by the questioner should be considered a deep relationship, and the key factor is internal resonance.

So, first, go out there and be brave! Extend your desire for friendship, practice socializing, and let others see you. Second, cultivate your inner character. Believe in yourself! If you are fragrant, the butterflies will come!

There are so many ways to learn about socializing! Books and audio-visual materials are easy to find. The questioner can absolutely do it!

Blessings!

Thank you so much for your question!

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and confusions. Having close friends we can rely on is one of the best things in life.

You mentioned that you're a little confused about making friends. Don't worry, it's totally normal! Making friends usually requires that both parties have common interests or topics, so that there can be more communication and interaction.

Have you thought about joining some interest groups or social activities to meet more like-minded people and expand your social circle?

You also mentioned that you have limited interests outside of work and study. Have you ever thought about learning a new skill or developing a new hobby? It would be a great way to enrich your life and give you more topics to talk about with others!

I'm also here to listen if you've had any difficulties or challenges in making friends. We all have! For example, how to make connections with strangers, how to maintain long-lasting friendships, etc.

I'm here for you, ready to listen to your thoughts and feelings and provide you with advice and support.

Building a lasting and close relationship with your peers does require some skill and effort, but it's worth it! Here are some suggestions to help you build deeper relationships:

1. Be open and proactive! Don't be afraid to start a conversation and share your thoughts and feelings. When you open up, others will be more willing to share their stories with you.

2. Find common interests: It's always a great idea to find common interests with colleagues or friends, so that you will have more topics to talk about. For example, you can participate in singing activities together or learn some new skills together.

3. Stay in touch often! Whether it's by phone, WeChat, or meeting up in person, staying in touch regularly is the best way to keep your friendships strong. Even if you're far apart, you can still video chat and catch up!

4. Listen and understand: When others share their stories with you, try your best to listen and understand. They'll really appreciate it! It'll make them feel respected and understood, and they'll be more willing to stay in touch.

5. Offer help and support: When friends or colleagues need help, be there for them! Offer your support and advice, and they'll know they can count on you.

6. Get out there and have fun! Join more social activities, like parties and sports, to meet new people and make new friends.

7. Self-improvement: You can also try to expand your knowledge and skills! For example, you can learn some life skills, keep up with fashion trends, or pay attention to some hot topics. This will help you have more things to talk about when communicating with others.

8. Stay positive! Keep an open mind and don't dwell on your own shortcomings. Everyone has their own strengths and specialties. Learn to appreciate yourself and show your confident side!

Building deep interpersonal relationships takes time and effort, but it's worth it! Be patient, be sincere, and you'll gradually build friendships that will last a lifetime.

And don't forget to give others the space and time they need to gradually open up to you. We all need a certain amount of privacy and personal time!

Hello! I'm June Lai Feng.

You seem troubled by your social performance. The problems you mentioned are common.

Don't be hard on yourself. Everyone has different strengths and interests.

From a psychological point of view, this shows what's going on inside you.

First, you may have negative thoughts about yourself and not believe in your abilities. You may focus on your weaknesses and ignore your strengths. You may be afraid to talk about other topics in depth.

Second, social anxiety: You may feel anxious or fearful during social interactions, worrying that you may not be accepted. This may cause you to avoid in-depth discussions.

If you don't know much about what interests other people, it's harder for you to take part in deep discussions.

Not knowing enough about different topics limits how much you can take part in conversations.

A lack of social skills may prevent you from connecting with others on a deeper level.

If you don't have many interests in common, it's harder to find topics to talk about.

To get out of this situation, try these methods:

First, change your mindset. Everyone is unique. Your beautiful voice and love of old songs are your unique charm.

Be yourself. Don't undervalue yourself.

Second, learn about lots of different things. If you feel that your knowledge is narrow, try to learn more.

You can learn about flowers, pets, clothing, and other things to make your own knowledge and conversation topics richer. You can learn by reading, watching documentaries, and going to lectures.

You can also learn new things like playing a musical instrument or a new sport. These can give you more to talk about. Try to grow flowers, keep pets, or do home decoration. Learning by doing is often more profound and gives you more to share.

Third, improve your communication skills. Learn to listen and ask questions. Guide the conversation, ask open-ended questions, and listen carefully.

When talking to others, don't always speak first. Listen to what they have to say. You can learn about them by listening.

Ask questions to guide the conversation and get to know the other person better.

Then, get involved in social activities like interest groups, community service, and industry gatherings. These are great ways to meet new people. Stay in touch with your friends and family. Even a quick hello can keep your relationships strong.

Both people in a friendship need to work at it.

Building deep relationships takes time.

You can deepen your relationships with like-minded people through shared experiences. When interacting with others, be sincere and enthusiastic.

Don't try to please others. Learn to appreciate their strengths. Don't rush things.

Finally, be confident and optimistic. Believe in yourself and that you will find people who appreciate you.

Don't give up because of temporary difficulties or setbacks.

Building deep friendships takes time. Don't rush it. Enjoy the process and treat everyone sincerely.

Your social skills and friends will grow. With effort, you will have lasting, deep friendships.

Have fun!

Hello, my name is Zeyu.

"How might we cultivate lasting and intimate companionships in our daily lives?" We will endeavor to offer some suggestions in conjunction with the content to answer this question.

The questioner describes himself as a "lone ranger" because it seems that he has been alone since childhood, without close friends to accompany him and do many interesting things together. In fact, it might be helpful to clarify a misunderstanding about friends. Generally speaking, the number of friends we can make in our lives and be able to talk to is about 150 people. Among them, 50 people are people we can chat with, 15 are close friends, 5 are close friends, and the last 1 or 2 are the most important people.

It may be the case that the people we encounter at this particular moment in time are simply passing through our lives and do not fall within the 150-person group.

Regardless of our upbringing or the knowledge we have gained, our aspirations for the future remain unchanged. Perhaps the experiences of our past have subtly influenced our present circumstances. Our desire to form lasting and stable friendships could be seen as a form of self-discovery. We no longer feel the need to set our sights too high. By initially aiming to make friends with a select few, we may inadvertently exclude many potential companions.

It might be helpful to try to keep an open mind and meet people as you go along. We all have our own favorite things to do and our own preferences and strengths, and this will naturally lead to the formation of corresponding circles. It might be unwise to deliberately join an unfamiliar circle or group, or to passively or force ourselves to blend in with the crowd. We could perhaps use our free time after work or in our spare time to find a place in life that suits our interests and hobbies and get involved in it. For example, if the questioner likes to read, then going to the library or reading room might be a good idea. In a familiar environment and atmosphere, we are more likely to find people with the same interests and resonate with them, and it is easier to become friends with them.

Finally, we might also consider trying to remain true to ourselves and be our authentic selves. If we like someone and want to become friends, we could perhaps take the initiative to approach them, regardless of whether we succeed or fail. What might be most important is that through this process, we will continue to accumulate experience and find our own rhythm.

Hello! I'm a heart exploration coach, and I'm here to help you let go and fly! Life is a beautiful journey, and it's time to appreciate and embrace the blooming you!

You understand your feelings very well and long for deep and long-lasting friendships, whether with friends or colleagues. Past experiences have made you unsure of how to establish and maintain a deep connection with people. Let's take a look and see how you can turn this around!

?1. Your parents have had a big impact on your life, and you've had some great experiences as a result!

As you said, when you were young, your parents were so protective of you! They wanted to make sure you were safe and loved you so much, they kept you isolated from your classmates and friends.

Including some ways of dealing with people and consumption concepts, all of which have had a certain impact on you. But don't worry! When you look back, you'll see that you've gained so much valuable experience along the way.

You may feel lonely sometimes, but you're going to conquer that feeling! Now that you are working, you feel that you are not as good as others in terms of hobbies, life skills, and family matters. But you can do it! You can only hope that someone can get close to you, enter your heart, and become a good friend.

Absolutely! Everyone has a desire to belong, to be understood and accepted, to be liked and accepted.

Back then, you were young and didn't have complete judgment or the ability to be independent. Now, you have received a higher education and accumulated some life experiences and knowledge of your own. And you are fully capable of changing all this!

?2. Give sincerity and you will receive sincerity; master the methods and skills of getting along with people

There's so much to love about a person! You start with their appearance, then move on to their talent, then their character, then their kindness, and finally their integrity.

Some people are perfectly suited to each other and form a deep, lasting friendship. Some people form alliances out of self-interest, which also includes friendship.

The workplace is a whole new ballgame compared to campus. It's all about building subtle relationships with people. When you give your sincere, you'll be blown away by the positive feedback you'll get!

You have some limitations in your self-assessment and lack confidence and certainty in yourself. But here's the good news: everything has two sides! What you see as being inexperienced, others may see as being simple and kind.

If you're not great at expressing your thoughts, you can become an amazing listener! If you don't know much, you can learn from others with a low profile and humility. Isn't this a fantastic opportunity to get in touch with people and start a conversation?

In short, instead of approaching others with ulterior motives, which is not your strong point, why not show them your most sincere side? You can share snacks with colleagues, share your thoughts on a book, etc.! Start by adding WeChat friends, start by liking posts in your circle of friends, start by inviting friends to your home for a visit, to watch a movie, or to spend the weekend together, start by asking them to help you with a small task.

Feel the friendliness and kindness that others release, and then have in-depth and targeted exchanges to establish a deep connection!

Kindness with wisdom is the best! It's more powerful and provides good protection, so you're not taken advantage of by people with ulterior motives. And you can gradually build up your own circle of friends!

I really hope the above is helpful to you! The world and I love you!

If you want to continue the conversation, you can follow my personal homepage, "Heart Exploration Service," where we can continue this amazing journey together!

Hello, I'm Coach Yu, and I'm really excited to discuss this topic with you!

Now, let's dive into the past! The past will affect the present, so let's explore it together.

As the questioner wrote, I remember having good friends when I was a child. My mother always opposed and blocked it, saying that I should spend my time studying and that I would have a better life if I became successful later.

Let's imagine this: I was invited by a classmate to sing and go shopping. My mother objected, but I was excited to go anyway. What was the scene like? What were my thoughts? What emotions and feelings did it bring me? Or, let's try this: I was invited by a classmate to her house, but my mother stopped me. What was the scene like? What were my thoughts? What emotions and feelings did it bring me?

And we can ask ourselves another question: if we hadn't listened to our mother, what would we have said? What would we have done?

Oh, the possibilities! What will happen?

However, the great news is that past experiences do not determine our present and future! We just need to have the courage to look forward.

Now, let's dive into the fascinating topic of interpersonal relationships! Adler once proposed the intriguing idea that all human troubles may actually stem from these relationships.

Because people are always afraid of being hated by others and being hurt in relationships, they are prone to develop an inferiority complex. But here's the good news! The inferiority complex that plagues people is often not an "objective fact" but a "subjective interpretation." And here's another good news! We can overcome this challenge by recognizing that we have already set up scenarios in our hearts, such as "I don't want this" and "I will disturb the other person."

This is why the challenges we face in our relationships can be a gateway to deeper self-discovery and understanding.

Let's ask ourselves some great questions! What about ourselves makes us feel like we have limited knowledge? What about ourselves makes us afraid of disturbing others?

And we can also ask ourselves: What is the ideal interpersonal relationship? What is the ideal self?

What do I really need? What can I do?

It's time to take a good, hard look at our circle of friends! We all have different types of friends, from those we're super close with to those we're just casually acquainted with. There are friends in our inner circle, friends in our outer circle, and friends even further out. The best friendships are built on mutual respect and support.

It's time to find a friend with whom you have a relatively good relationship and have an honest conversation with them! It's all about listening to what they have to say and how they feel when they are with you. This will help you to understand yourself better and also release pent-up emotions.

Absolutely! We can also seek help because if this bothers you, it is not easy to overcome it immediately. Try to find a counselor or a supportive group to talk to and express your true thoughts.

And there's more! We also need to enrich our inner selves, open our hearts, read and learn more, participate in group activities with friends, discover our unique value, and expand our interpersonal relationships. When your core is strong, you can show yourself with more confidence!

I highly recommend "Meet the Unknown Self"—it's an amazing book!

Hello! I can tell from your words that you're looking to build a great friendship with others. First of all, I want to give you a big hug and hope that my answer will be helpful to you!

Looking back to my childhood, I can remember that the family environment may have prevented me from trying and growing in terms of making friends. I made a few good friends in college and early work, but due to work changes, we lost touch. So it seems that we don't have a close and lasting best friend, which seems to be a regretful and frustrating thing. There are two sides to everything. On the one hand, we will crave lasting and intimate companionship even more because we don't have it, and on the other hand, we can also see the independent and autonomous aspects of the questioner. Therefore, it seems inaccurate to say unilaterally that you are quite boring. We need to look at ourselves in a comprehensive way, don't you think?

I'm so happy to help you with this! We can explore this together, and I really hope it will be helpful to you in facing the questioner's current need to establish a lasting and intimate companionship.

It's so important to get involved in social activities! Try to attend social events like company parties, team-building activities, or community events.

This is a great way to make new friends and meet new people! Don't worry if you're not an expert on everything — most people are happy to chat with newcomers and will appreciate your input.

Why not propose some activities? You could offer to organize small gatherings, such as lunches, coffee, or outdoor activities.

This is a great way to get to know someone better and show them that you're invested in maintaining friendships.

It's always a great idea to find common ground with others. You can do this by identifying shared interests or goals, such as common hobbies, work projects, or life experiences.

This helps to create a deeper connection and makes the conversation flow more naturally, which is really lovely!

Be a good listener and show empathy and understanding for other people's experiences. It's so important to listen and empathize!

People really appreciate it when you listen to them. It's a great way to build deeper relationships! And expressing empathy is a wonderful way to show that you care about them. It'll really deepen the bond between you.

It's always a great idea to work on your communication skills! And if you're looking to expand your knowledge, why not try reading some books on pop culture, fashion trends, or even some life hacks?

This will give you more things to chat about during your conversations and make you seem even more interesting!

Be yourself! Don't try to be someone you're not. Express yourself sincerely and show your true self.

People are more likely to form deep, wonderful friendships with people who are genuine and unpretentious.

Stay in touch! Even if you're not in the same place of work, it's always a good idea to keep in touch with former colleagues or friends. You could catch up on social media, give them a call, or send them an email.

Just a little note here and there to say hi and check in on how you're doing can go a long way in keeping the spark alive in your relationship.

Be open-minded! Keep an open mind to new things, and be willing to learn and try new things.

And the best part is, it'll enrich your life experience and also make for great new topics of conversation with others!

It's so important to feel good about yourself. We all have different strengths and talents, and it's great to recognize that your value isn't just based on your work achievements. It's also about who you are as a person and what you enjoy doing in your free time.

You have a beautiful singing voice, which is a great way to show off your talents at the right occasions!

Self-improvement is a wonderful thing! It allows you to learn new things and gain new skills, which not only makes you more competitive at work, but also gives you more things to talk about in social situations.

Everyone has their own way of life and values, and there's absolutely no need to force yourself to adapt to other people's standards. Just stay true to yourself, be open-minded, respect others, and value your own feelings.

Building a deep relationship takes time and effort from both of you. There's no need to rush things, but it's important to nurture and develop your relationship slowly.

It's totally normal to accept that not all relationships will develop into deep friendships. What's really important is to find people who truly appreciate you and connect with them.

I really hope you can find friends who share your interests and create beautiful memories together!

I really hope my answer is helpful for you! I love you all so much, and I hope you have a wonderful day! ??

In life, we all want close friends who support us and share our joys and sorrows. But reality is often different, and sometimes we find ourselves alone in a crowd.

We must take a fresh look at our relationships with others and how we can break down barriers and establish stable and deep friendships.

First, we must understand that building a friendship takes time and effort. It's not something that happens overnight. We need to be willing to put in the work and maintain the relationship over time. It's not just about our own needs and feelings. We also need to learn to think from the other person's perspective, understand their differences, and respect them.

This is the only way to gradually establish a deep emotional connection in our interactions.

Second, it's crucial to understand that friendship is a two-way street of giving and receiving. When we interact with people, we must be grateful and appreciate everything they do for us.

We must also learn to give our time, energy, and care to help and support those friends we cherish. This is the only way to make the spark of friendship burn more vigorously in mutual care.

Next, we can start with the following aspects to establish a stable and in-depth friendship:

1. Actively seek common ground.

Everyone has their own unique characteristics, but there are also common ground. These commonalities can be our shared interests, professional backgrounds, values, etc.

Focusing on these commonalities allows us to identify topics and entry points for communication, fostering closer relationships. Participating in activities or projects together also deepens mutual understanding and trust.

2. Learn to listen and express yourself.

When interacting with others, listening and expressing are essential. Listening allows us to understand others' thoughts and feelings, while expressing allows others to understand our inner world.

It is essential that we learn to listen attentively to what the other person is saying and resist the urge to interrupt or give advice. At the same time, we must also learn to express our thoughts and feelings with confidence so that the other person understands our true thoughts and needs.

3. Respect and accept differences.

Everyone has their own personality and characteristics, and these differences make our world more colorful. When interacting with others, it is essential to respect and accept these differences. Attempting to change the other person or make them adapt to us is counterproductive and unproductive.

We must learn to appreciate the uniqueness of others and draw nourishment and inspiration from it. Accepting differences allows us to better understand each other and establish more inclusive and profound friendships.

4. Initiate contact.

In establishing friendships, taking the initiative is crucial. Don't wait for others to invite you to activities or parties. Take the initiative and invite or suggest participation.

Initiating contact is a powerful way to show our positive attitude and desire for friendship, attracting more like-minded friends. It also allows us to control the pace and initiative of the relationship, ensuring we don't miss the chance to establish a friendship with others by passively waiting.

5. Stay true to yourself and be kind.

Sincerity and kindness are essential qualities when dealing with people. Only when we remain sincere and kind can we win the trust and respect of others.

When interacting with friends, maintain sincerity and avoid hypocrisy or pretension. Also, care for and support your friends so they feel your warmth and love.

By remaining sincere and kind, you can build stronger, more lasting friendships.

Finally, we must understand the preciousness and difficulty of friendship. Setbacks and difficulties are part of the process of establishing friendships. As long as we maintain a positive attitude and work tirelessly, we will find friends who are truly worth cherishing.

We must also learn to cherish and maintain these friendships, as they are one of the most valuable assets in our lives.

Building stable and deep friendships requires effort and patience. It's as simple as actively seeking common ground, learning to listen and express ourselves, respecting and accepting differences, initiating contact, and being sincere and kind. These steps will gradually break down barriers, establish deep emotional connections, and win friends who are truly worth cherishing.

Dear question asker, I empathize with your aspiration to cultivate enduring and profound friendships. I recognize that your previous experiences may have led to some uncertainty regarding the process of forming friendships.

It is important to note that each individual's life trajectory is distinct, and we are all engaged in a continuous process of learning and growth, driven by a desire for connection and empathy with others.

From your narrative, it is evident that you are a diligent and prudent individual. Your family background and upbringing have shaped your emphasis on learning, but may also have constrained your social interactions with peers to some extent.

Concurrently, one is conscious of one's deficiencies in specific social skills, which engenders a modicum of unease when interacting with others. However, it is imperative to recognize that these are not insurmountable challenges.

In the course of life, it is essential to cultivate the capacity to form profound connections with others. This endeavor necessitates not only fortitude but also discernment and endurance. It is my intention to present a series of specific recommendations that I believe will prove beneficial in facilitating more meaningful interactions with others.

1. Adopt an open and proactive approach. When encountering an individual who piques one's interest or seems worthy of further acquaintance, it is advisable to take the initiative and initiate an in-depth discussion. One may commence with a relatively informal topic and subsequently transition to more profound matters.

It should be noted that sincerity and openness are fundamental to the formation of friendships.

2. Cultivate shared interests: One may endeavor to gain knowledge about subjects or skills that pique one's interest but are previously unfamiliar, such as flower cultivation, pet ownership, home decoration, and so forth. This approach facilitates the identification of common ground with others, thereby enriching the discourse.

Additionally, one may cultivate a broader social circle by joining interest groups or club activities, which often facilitate the formation of connections with individuals who share similar interests.

3. Develop effective listening and communication skills. When interacting with others, it is crucial to listen attentively to the thoughts and feelings of the other person and provide positive feedback.

Concurrently, it is essential to develop the capacity to articulate one's perspectives and emotions, thereby facilitating the other person's comprehension of one's internal reality.

4. Explore alternative socialization methods: In addition to traditional face-to-face interactions, it is also possible to utilize novel socialization methods, such as online social platforms or communities. These platforms provide the opportunity to interact with individuals from diverse geographical regions and backgrounds, thereby facilitating the expansion of one's social network.

5. It is important to maintain a positive outlook when faced with challenges in the process of establishing friendships. Believing in one's capacity to form deep and lasting relationships with others is crucial for success in this endeavor.

It is important to remember that every attempt provides an opportunity for learning and growth.

Additionally, I would like to present a brief anecdote regarding friendship. There was a time when two individuals, despite their markedly disparate personalities, forged a profound bond of friendship.

This is done because there is appreciation for each other's uniqueness and willingness to invest time and energy in each other. There is often sharing of life experiences, interests, and dreams, as well as support and encouragement when needed.

Such mutual understanding and support serves to foster the growth of their friendship.

Dear friend, I am of the opinion that you are capable of forming your own friendships. It is my recommendation that you maintain an open mind, be adventurous in your approach to social interaction, and continue to expand your knowledge and skills.

It is important to remember that true friendship is built on mutual respect, understanding, and support. It is possible to have stable and deep friendships and to spend quality time with people who understand and value you.

Ultimately, it is my sincere hope that you will encounter a multitude of like-minded individuals and establish a multitude of beautiful memories in the process.

Hello there, question asker!

It's not easy to find a true friend in life, and it's even harder to find one for a lifetime. It's really special when you have just two true friends in a lifetime.

Before you find your soulmate, make sure you're a good person! People with similar interests will naturally be attracted to each other.

You know what they say: birds of a feather flock together! So, what kind of close friend do you want to find?

You know what you have to do? You have to become that kind of person. And if you do that, you'll find that you become the kind of person you like.

And the best part is, you'll attract friends with the same interests!

I really believe that shared interests are the best way to find close friends. And it's so important to develop your own interests too!

People with the same interests can have so much fun exploring and learning together, and they can grow together, too! It's no surprise that they naturally become close friends.

It's often said that if you want something, you have to give something first. And it's so true! Love gives love back, and happiness brings happiness.

If you want a friend who cares about you, then you've got to be able to care about the people around you too!

If you're looking for a friend who can accept you, you've got to be the kind of person who accepts others.

It's so true that our relationships with others are really relationships with ourselves.

It's so true that how you see yourself is how others will see you. If you think, "It seems pretty boring, nothing attracts friends anymore,"

I'm sorry to say that you probably won't attract any friends.

You really have to see the good in yourself. We all have our own bright spots!

You'll find it when you're ready. In the meantime, just show the world your own special sparkle!

Who naturally attracts admiration!

Mo Yan said something really lovely: "We spend our whole lives searching for someone."

"Your soul is close to you, and you'll finally discover that the only one who fits is yourself."