How to win back my wife who wants a divorce due to personality incompatibility, as our child is only a few months old?

Good day.

From what you've shared, it seems that your current married life is causing you some distress. The birth of your child should have been a joyful occasion, but you may now be facing some challenges in understanding your partner's emotions and actions. Despite these difficulties, you have chosen to seek help and work towards improving the relationship. Your commitment and responsibility are evident, and you are a good husband and father.

I believe we can work together to find a solution by sorting out the problems and allow a good life to return again.

It might be helpful to try to first calm everyone's emotions.

It might be helpful to consider taking care of your emotions first.

Due to your wife's actions, you may be experiencing feelings of frustration, fatigue, and even resentment and anger. If this is the case, it's important to consider how these emotions might affect your children, who are still developing and learning how to navigate the world around them.

It's important to remember that children are very sensitive and vulnerable. Even though they're still very young, they can sense their parents' emotions even before they're born. While your wife is dealing with her own issues, it's crucial to ensure that you're taking care of yourself. Your children still need you, and it's essential to prioritize their well-being.

It would be beneficial for you and your children if you could find a little time every day to do something that releases emotions. You might like to try running, push-ups, singing, confiding in someone, meditation, or anything else that you enjoy.

If I might make one more suggestion, it would be to try to find 10 or 20 minutes a day, even when you are busy, to do something that makes you happy and lets your emotions out.

(2) Secondly, it would be beneficial to consider taking care of your wife's emotions.

It might be helpful to keep in mind that the baby is only a few months old. This change will bring with it an additional role for the two of you: one is the father, and the other is the mother.

It is worth noting that mothers often have to navigate more changes than fathers, including shifts in appearance, hormone levels, and life priorities. During this period, women may be particularly sensitive, vulnerable, and prone to depression. It is therefore important to ensure that your loved one receives the care and support she needs. It may be helpful to check in on her for signs of postpartum depression.

I can see that my wife is now experiencing a lot of negative emotions and behaviors, such as indifference, sulking, extreme thoughts, and avoidance. It seems that she feels that you don't care about her. These emotions may not have appeared all at once, but are the result of long-term suppression. It's possible that she doesn't know how to express her emotions, and she may be struggling to love herself or those around her.

It seems as though she is seeking your love, which is something she may be lacking. We often seek what we lack the most.

Given the option to seek help on the platform, I believe you have been tolerant and understanding of her. During this special period, it might be helpful to give her more love and tolerance.

Perhaps you could help her to recognize her emotions, support her in getting out of the depression, and encourage her to exercise, talk, and engage in the activities she enjoys.

It might be helpful to try to look at life from a developmental perspective.

Everyone goes through several stages in life, such as studying, getting a job, getting married, having children, and retiring. When you go from one person to two, your life changes a little, but it's not much different from being in a relationship. We can successfully pass this test if we try.

When the number of people in a household changes from two to three, it can be a significant shift. Previously, everyone might have only cared about taking care of themselves, but now they have the opportunity to learn how to take care of a child. The number of things they have to do every day will also increase from one to dozens. Everyone is a novice when it comes to a newborn, so it is understandable that they might feel nervous, anxious, and overwhelmed at first.

If the elderly in the family need to help out with childcare, it will undoubtedly lead to changes in the extended family dynamic. There may also be differences in living habits, challenges in aligning work and rest schedules, and other factors to consider. These are the paths we navigate in life, and it is often these seemingly minor matters that make life rich and interesting.

Given that you mentioned that you two met through a matchmaking service, it seems there may not be a particularly strong emotional foundation. In today's world, many people may find themselves relying on matchmaking services to enter into marriage. Some families may also fall into the category of "getting married before falling in love," which could be seen as similar to the state of marriage among the older generation.

For this reason, it is important to view every difficulty encountered in life as an opportunity to strengthen the bond between husband and wife. Similarly, every quarrel can be seen as a small test. If one person is able to understand the question and provide an appropriate answer, it is likely that the issue will not arise again.

Life is not easy. It requires hard work. It's important to maintain a positive outlook and find joy in life. ? It's also crucial to be resilient and wise.

Greetings!

It is understandable that you are experiencing a range of intense emotions, including anxiety, pain, frustration, helplessness, and anger, due to your wife's desire for a divorce.

Your wife is immature, and there is no significant conflict between you. However, she has initiated divorce proceedings and has abandoned the infant, who is only a few months old. Despite your numerous grievances against her, you believe there is still potential for salvaging the marriage. Moreover, the child is still very young, and it is inevitable that a marriage will encounter difficulties at this stage. It is therefore essential for you and your wife to actively adjust and learn how to coexist harmoniously. However, you are uncertain about how to convince your wife or how to salvage the marriage, which has led to feelings of confusion and helplessness.

1. Cease the practice of complaining and blaming.

In your description, you indicated that your wife lacks responsibility, is indifferent, and disregards your needs and those of your children. These are her issues, yet when you address these concerns in relation to him, you are, in fact, complaining and blaming. While I acknowledge the veracity of your statements, engaging in such complaining and blaming is an ineffective approach to problem-solving and may even result in unintended negative consequences.

The act of criticism often implies the presence of underlying expectations, and the act of criticizing others can be seen as a means of indirectly expressing unmet needs.

It is therefore recommended that you first control your emotions, refrain from complaining and blaming, and allow yourself to let go of such thoughts in order to become aware of your own inner needs.

2. Greater understanding and tolerance.

It is possible that you have already identified the root cause of your wife's personality issues. Her upbringing by her grandmother from an early age resulted in a lack of parental love, which in turn led to a deficiency in her capacity for love and a tendency towards irresponsibility. From this perspective, these are not her faults, and she is deserving of understanding and tolerance. If you can comprehend her situation from this vantage point, you will develop greater compassion and tolerance towards her. This shift in perspective will markedly enhance your attitude towards your wife.

Once an individual is able to comprehend and accommodate another's perspective, they may be inclined to prioritize the fulfillment of their needs and the gratification of their desires.

3. It is advisable to commence with oneself and then proceed to modify the relationship from the vantage point of the relationship as a whole.

All relationships are reciprocal. When one party complains that the other is too indifferent, it may be indicative of a deeper-seated need for dependence.

Once an individual is able to adjust and comprehend their partner's needs, while simultaneously recognizing and articulating their own, a channel of communication may be established. This process is contingent upon a mutual understanding and the capacity to build relationships.

It is important to note that this is a challenging process, requiring the ability to discern and process negative emotions, and to reciprocate with positive emotions. For instance, in response to an adamant attitude towards divorce, it is possible to express one's own attitude and thoughts in a gentle but firm voice, demonstrating determination to salvage the marriage through personal efforts. Once the individual has calmed down, communication can be initiated, and care can be shown in daily interactions. It is essential to recognize that the individual possesses a more mature perspective and a higher level of perception than their partner. The primary objective is to salvage the marriage.

4. The process of growth and change is inherently time-consuming.

The upbringing environment has a profound impact on an individual's personality, and this process is inherently time-consuming. It is therefore essential to exercise patience and tolerance while awaiting the desired changes and growth.

It is my hope that the response from Hongyu will prove beneficial to you. I am grateful for your inquiry.

Dear Question Asker,

My wife is adamant about pursuing a divorce due to our incompatible personalities and the fact that our child is only a few months old. What is the best course of action? Let's resolve this matter together.

After two years of marriage, the couple has already passed the honeymoon period and moved from the ideal model of intimacy to the reality of life together. They may find that the other person is very different from their ideal partner. At this time, if they can reflect rationally on themselves, be tolerant of each other, and see more of the other person's good points, their relationship will smoothly enter the attachment stage.

If we choose to terminate the relationship through divorce, while the immediate issue may be resolved, the underlying pattern of intimacy remains. This pattern will likely manifest in subsequent intimate relationships.

It is important to exercise caution when considering divorce, particularly in cases where children are involved. The parents' relationship has a significant impact on a child's development, and it is essential to recognize that a child needs a complete home, which requires the input of both parents.

It is recommended that couples seek family and marriage counseling together. During counseling sessions, both parties may be prompted to express love and affection that they have previously neglected, which could potentially lead to the dissolution of resentment and the achievement of reconciliation.

Additionally, there are self-regulatory methods that the questioner may wish to consider.

(1) Discontinue the practice of judging the other party.

When we categorize our colleagues as a specific type of person, our perspective on them may become limited. This narrow view may cause us to perceive their actions as always aligning with our expectations, which could result in missing the positive aspects of their contributions.

(2) Demonstrate greater consideration for your wife.

It is challenging for a new mother to care for a child who is a few months old. The family should not place sole responsibility for childcare on the mother. She also needs support in identifying her needs and receiving her husband's love.

When your wife is visibly upset, it may be beneficial to inquire about the source of her frustration and explore potential solutions together.

(3) Postpone the discussion of divorce.

According to recent surveys and statistics, the implementation of a one-month delay in the processing of divorce has resulted in an 80% reduction in the divorce rate. This allows us to temporarily set aside the divorce and focus on getting our lives back to normal. It is now possible to resume normal work and childcare routines.

Allow time for everyone to calm down and resume discussions.

(4) Listen to the other person's thoughts.

In this situation, communication may be challenging, but it is still possible to discuss your concerns with your partner. For instance, if your child is young and has lost their mother, you could ask your wife how to respond if the child asks where their mother is. When issues are contentious, it may be helpful to negotiate a solution that is acceptable to both parties, such as a prohibition on certain words or behaviors.

Additionally, it may be beneficial to request that the other party articulate their needs. By gaining insight into the other person's expectations, it becomes possible to collaborate towards a shared goal and a direction for change.

(5) Should this approach prove ineffective, it is advisable to accept the situation and consider how to proceed.

I hope this information is useful to you.

Best regards,

Hello, question asker! It's like seeing you in person when I read your words!

After reading your post, I could really feel how helpless and anxious you must be feeling in your intimate relationship. I could also sense that you still want to save your marriage, whether it's for love or for the children. I'd love to give you some inspiration from a female perspective:

1. I see that your little one is only a few months old. You mentioned that your wife is indifferent and unconcerned about you and your child, only demanding and not giving. She can come across as irresponsible, has a bad temper and gets angry easily, can't take a joke, and never cleans up after herself or takes care of anything at home.

It seems like you're focusing on the negative things about your wife, and I can't say I blame you. But as a fellow mom, I just want to remind you that your wife is still in that sensitive period right after giving birth, so her emotions are likely to be all over the place at the moment. Are there any other symptoms?

Has she been like this since you started living together, or did she only start behaving like this after the pregnancy and birth? It's still not common for a new mother to be indifferent towards her child, so it's important to look out for her.

I think it would be really helpful for you to compare her before and after, and give her a little more tolerance and help, especially as most breastfeeding mothers experience postpartum depression. If there is a real need, I think you should take her to see a psychologist for an assessment to see if you can really help her.

2. You mentioned that your wife was brought up by her grandmother and lacked parental love. Now she won't listen to anyone, has extreme ideas, and says that anyone who tries to persuade her is forcing her to die. It's clear you've been paying attention to your wife's upbringing environment, which has likely shaped her personality in significant ways. However, it's not usually so extreme as to mention "death" at every turn.

I just wanted to let you know that this might need a bit of extra attention. She talks about death all the time, and I get the feeling that she's going through a lot of confusion and pressure. She really needs someone to help her sort things out and guide her.

3. I heard you say that you were brought together by a matchmaking agency and that you didn't have an emotional foundation at the beginning. Now she has a serious deviation in her thinking, and you don't know what to do or how to salvage the situation.

I think it's so important to remember that you've been together for two years and have a child. No matter whether you felt a spark at the beginning or how you got together, there must be something in the past that you can cherish and remember together. You mentioned wanting to salvage the relationship, which is so admirable. I don't know if it's out of a sense of responsibility to the child or out of love for her, but I'm here to support you either way.

In any case, as long as you have a heart that wants to be reconciled, you can do something to make it happen. I have some small suggestions that I think you'll find helpful.

Forget the current negative comments about your wife and think about why you got married in the first place. Have you ever seen her good side? I bet you have!

When you put aside all those negative comments you've been making about her, you'll have a great starting point for communicating with her. It's so important to remember that your feelings will also be communicated to her.

I really think it would help if you took your wife to see a psychologist. There are lots of great ones at local maternal and child health hospitals. They can help you figure out what's going on.

In this nuclear family, you should be your wife's greatest driving force and pillar. If you want to save your marriage, your attitude and behavior are really important. Let her see how sincere you are. When she slowly puts down her armor, she may become softer and be able to release her true emotions and thoughts.

I really do wish you all the very best for your happiness!

In light of the challenges imposed by the system, it is evident that you and your family are grappling with significant difficulties. The three individuals within the family unit—you, the child's mother, and the infant, who is a few months old—are all experiencing a crisis.

The information provided has been analyzed, and the results will be presented in order to determine if they are of any assistance to you.

Firstly, the term "redeem" was employed, which suggests a perception of personal responsibility for the marital situation. It would be beneficial to identify these perceived contributions and engage in a constructive dialogue with your wife to clarify your understanding and emotions.

It is important to note that the tone, intonation, speed, and timing of communication are crucial elements that should be considered. Given that your wife may be in a highly sensitive state, it is advisable to avoid communicating in the same manner as you would normally do, which may involve speaking without much thought.

The rationale for this assertion can be found in the second point below.

Secondly, it is possible that your wife is experiencing emotional distress. You have indicated that the child is only a few months old, which suggests that your wife has recently given birth. During this period, women often experience hormonal imbalances at all levels. If the family's primary focus is on the child, or if the child receives more attention than the postpartum mother, it can further exacerbate the challenges faced by this woman.

In particular, you mentioned her childhood experiences. She received minimal affection from her mother and father, which may have contributed to her difficulty in becoming a mother and providing her child with the love and care expected of a mother. She received limited maternal love from her own mother, and she has no precedent within her own experience to guide her in providing maternal love to her child. The indifference you observe may be a manifestation of her pain. It is widely acknowledged that loving our children is an intrinsic aspect of our nature, and it can even be argued that hormones play a role in influencing this behavior.

Her emotional state is likely to be characterised by a profound sense of conflict and distress. It is plausible that she is contemplating divorce as a means of escaping the pain she is experiencing. When we reach a point where we are unable to cope with our circumstances any longer, we tend to activate what is known as the "escape mode".

It may be beneficial for both parties to take a moment to calm down and refrain from placing blame on the other for their perceived indifference and irresponsibility. There is a possibility that she has only become a wife and mother in terms of identity, but that her true nature remains unchanged. It is possible that she is unable to act in a responsible manner, particularly in the roles of a woman, wife, and mother. It may be necessary to provide her with assistance in becoming a qualified wife and mother. It is important to note that the emphasis here is on providing help, not on qualification.

There are numerous methods for assisting an individual in assuming a role. These include modeling, education, viewing documentaries, and self-directed learning.

In conclusion, it is essential to remain calm, acknowledge the mother's pain, and provide support to facilitate her growth and development.

Another crucial point is the child, who is a few months old. In the event that the mother is unable to provide care and love, the child still requires these things at this time. It is therefore necessary to provide them with these things, as it is difficult for the mother to do so in a short period of time.

However, there is a critical period in a child's development. If we delay until all issues have been resolved and then provide care for the child, we will have missed the critical period for the child's important psychological development.

It is further recommended that an assessment be conducted to determine whether postpartum depression is a factor.

I wish you the best of luck.

Good morning, host.

I empathize with your situation and feel for you. I want to give you a big hug and feel the warmth of the world.

It seems that the issue between you and your wife may have been present before your marriage, and that it was only after you got married that you felt that the two of you had incompatible personalities and that you had many grievances against your wife.

It might be helpful to consider that the wife you see now has some significant character flaws. Given that you say she lacks parental love and was raised by her grandmother, it's possible that she may also be a left-behind child. The trauma of childhood can take time to heal, and growing up inevitably leaves certain character flaws.

It seems that you feel your wife has a number of shortcomings, including a lack of responsibility and a lack of understanding of how to give. You also feel that she is indifferent to the children. This could suggest that she is still a child herself, equivalent to an adult who has not grown up. In terms of immature personality, perhaps there are problems with the way you two communicate.

It's possible that she's unhappy and has something on her mind, which might explain why she's not happy to talk to you about certain things. When she's not happy, she might start sulking, which is a way of expressing her unhappiness.

It seems that your wife may have some concerns, but is unsure of how to express them or to whom she can turn. As her husband, you are the person she can rely on the most. However, if you also treat her with an antagonistic attitude, it may lead to feelings of rebellion and a sense of being alone.

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider things from an objective and comprehensive perspective, rather than focusing on our own perspective alone. After all, there are often two sides to a story. It might be beneficial to approach the truth dialectically. Your wife mentioned that you don't always provide comfort, and that you're unsure how to care for her. Is this an accurate reflection of the situation?

Perhaps it would be helpful to consider that your wife's feelings may be hurt more easily than you realize. It's possible that she has some shortcomings and deficiencies, and that she may not see the level of dedication in you that she would like.

It seems that she is experiencing a sense of isolation and abandonment, which has led her to perceive a lack of care and support from you, her husband.

If the original poster still wants to be with your wife, doesn't want a divorce, and wants to continue maintaining the family, it would be helpful to consider the situation from your wife's perspective.

Perhaps it would be helpful to try communicating with him calmly, rather than resorting to complaints and blame. This approach may not be as effective as it could be in resolving the issue, and it may even intensify the conflict. It's a kind of extreme pulling that might not be helpful in the long run.

If you truly empathize with her, perhaps consider letting go of your opposition and talking things over with her. You could say something like, "Have I been neglecting you lately?" and then listen to her feelings. If you've been neglecting her in any way, apologize, talk to her nicely, and give her a way out. Women are often very easy to please, so it's worth trying to repair the relationship.

Perhaps you could take her out to the movies, the amusement park, the park, or just for a walk. It might be helpful to try not to talk about annoying things during this time, and just spend some time with her, to see if she'll be willing to tell you what's on her mind.

It is important to communicate and understand each other, to be tolerant, and to avoid blaming and complaining. While these actions may not necessarily help your relationship, they could potentially lead to its deterioration.

It would be beneficial for the original poster to consider refraining from complaining, demonstrating greater empathy, and attempting to comprehend his wife's perspective. It is important to understand the underlying reasons for her anger and frustration.

It's possible that what she thinks and what she expresses may not always align. It could be that she struggles to regulate her emotions or express her inner needs and thoughts effectively. This might lead you to perceive her actions as unreasonable, but it's important to recognize that many girls find it challenging to express their emotions.

Perhaps when the original poster understands this, they might as well try to be more tolerant and communicate with him calmly.

I hope the original poster finds happiness and joy in their relationship.

You know if you're a good match.

Marriage isn't the start or end of a relationship.

People who get together after dating are successful because...

They have equal conditions, don't mind each other, and have similar expectations. They think the other person is acceptable, so they get together and get married.

It can work out even without an emotional foundation.

Two years is not short. Your partner has also given birth.

Pregnancy and childbirth can cause depression in women. This is because they are easily frustrated and may feel neglected.

If someone lacks love, they'll appreciate the love you give them, especially if you give it a lot.

Do you show her care, concern, and love when you're with her?

When an avalanche happens, no snowflake is innocent.

Have you been there for her when she's vulnerable? Have you kept your promises?

Have you done that?

Has she been unhappy for a long time, or are there issues on both sides?

Hopefully, there won't be any other stories, like past relationships.

Everyone is concerned about themselves. It's natural to be demanding of others. Just as you feel she wants a divorce and is demanding of you.

You don't want her to leave and hope she'll listen.

It's about character.

If you can, talk to her.

Her dissatisfaction is due to you, your family, or your lifestyle.

If she's unhappy, it's probably because she doesn't like you.

What didn't you do?

Is it possible to salvage the relationship by coaxing her more, accepting her indifference and demands, accommodating her temper, not joking around, accepting her failure to clean up, and following her wishes?

If you can do the above, can you salvage the relationship?

Or do you insist on doing it until the end?

If you can't do it, you might say the person isn't right for you.

If you have the chance, talk as much as you did on your first date.

What do you want?

What does the other person want? Can you make compromises? Even if there's no room left?

If there's no hope, say goodbye.

If there's still room, work together to make it happen.

If you do it all or she adjusts it all, it won't solve your problems. There's your family, her family, your children, etc.

You need to face these things and share them.

Maybe after talking it through, you'll know how to handle the relationship next.

If you fit and can love and support each other, then satisfy your needs. Even if you get divorced.

You can remarry. You can still get in touch, meet, and get back together.

A marriage is a legal document that protects rights and obligations, but it is not necessary for maintaining a relationship.

If you can't get along, coordinate, or communicate, there's no point in keeping a paper record.

The point is to live well together.

All of these things need to be dealt with.

In relationships, you need to deal with problems one by one.

Trivial matters can be annoying.

Marriage doesn't solve life's problems.

It gives you the knowledge that someone is there to face it with you.

This is for reference. I hope it's good.

Dear Question Asker,

From your question, I can discern your feelings of helplessness and frustration, as well as your appreciation for your marriage and your love and protection for your newborn child. It is evident that you are experiencing significant challenges. I suspect that you are also at a stage in life where things are becoming more difficult, and I hope that your family life is still in order. When there is a change in the family, the one thing that is always considered is the family. First, I want to provide you with some encouragement.

I wish you the best of luck.

From your inquiry, it is evident that your wife is also facing significant challenges. The hormonal fluctuations associated with lactation, including the surge of estrogen prior to childbirth and its subsequent decline postpartum, can precipitate a range of negative emotions, including depression. Additionally, your wife's upbringing was marked by a complex environment, which may have contributed to her current circumstances. As a woman who has recently given birth, she is confronted with a multitude of family responsibilities and a novel personal and social role. Consequently, your wife's situation appears to be more complex. To salvage your marriage, it is essential to consider the following avenues:

First and foremost,

Given the circumstances, it is evident that your wife requires the love and companionship of her family, particularly the love and acceptance of her husband, which is of paramount importance to her. It is therefore imperative that you exercise patience and understanding towards your wife. At this juncture, it may be necessary for you to demonstrate even greater patience than you did in caring for the newborn. This entails providing care and support, expressing concern and love for your wife, and emphasising the value you place on her. It is crucial to recognise that your wife is facing significant challenges, and that these can be overwhelming without the necessary support. Consequently, it is essential to prioritise your wife's well-being and address her extreme thoughts with the utmost care and attention. This is the foundation for any effort to retain her.

Secondly,

It is imperative to relinquish your expectations and demands on your wife. Her proposal of divorce is indicative of a need for assistance. It is implausible that an individual would choose to dissolve their family just after the birth of a child. Your wife must be experiencing a considerable degree of confusion and may be uncertain about how to address the multitude of challenges she is facing. It is possible that she finds it challenging to meet your demands and expectations. She may have resorted to filing for divorce as a means of evading reality and seeking your attention and support. It is plausible that she is not fully aware of her own needs.

In conclusion,

As a final consideration, it may be helpful to assist your wife in adapting to her new role. Should circumstances allow, it may be beneficial to seek psychological counseling and psychotherapy. It is therefore important to utilize your wisdom in order to support your wife and your family through the implementation of evidence-based strategies.

Furthermore, I extend my sincerest wishes for your well-being and hope that you may find resolution to your difficulties and embark on a new chapter in your life.

Hello, topic starter! Let's dive right in and discuss this together!

It all started when he met and got to know his wife. They didn't have an emotional foundation at the beginning, but that didn't stop them!

They've been together for two years and their child is already a few months old!

My wife is indifferent to the family and gets angry easily, which is something we can definitely work on!

When things go wrong, he makes the bold choice to escape and file for divorce.

I can feel the deep sense of helplessness in the questioner, and I can also feel the questioner's desire to maintain the marriage and family, which is great!

Without an emotional foundation, there may not be enough understanding between each other. But there's so much potential for growth and understanding!

They have been together for two years, and I don't know if the past two years have been spent in discord. On the bright side, she was brought up by her grandmother and has a strong connection with her family.

"He's not ready to divorce, but he's feeling that his wife lacks a certain sense of security, so he's looking for ways to make things better."

The questioner can choose a time when she is calm and sit down with her to have a heart-to-heart talk. It's a great idea to list all the problems and solve them one by one!

I feel like you could really benefit from understanding each other better. I think you could learn a lot from her indifference and avoidance.

She doesn't understand your dedication to the family either, but she will!

My wife's emotions are quite extreme, and she has extreme thoughts and says extreme things that make people feel devastated. I also feel that her thinking has gone seriously awry. In the eyes of the questioner, she is quite selfish and doesn't care about the overall situation. But here's the good news! I can work with her on this.

The most fundamental thing is communication! Indirect arguments that are never resolved will affect normal life and the healthy growth of the children.

It's always a great idea to prepare for a long and detailed conversation!

It's a great idea for both parties to list out any problems they have. You can use a mobile phone note or something similar to record the problems, which will be more comprehensive, and you can also record them so that they can be solved if they arise in the future.

Let's solve this together! To do so, we'll need to remain calm and reassure each other during our communication. We can tackle the various problems head-on!

It feels like the questioner is relatively rational. If his wife has just had a deviation in thinking, give her some advice, give her some comfort and help as appropriate, establish a sense of intimacy, and make an appointment to work together for the family in the future.

I really hope my answer can be of some help to the questioner!

Dear question asker,

It might be interpreted as a gesture of support and encouragement, indicating that she perceives the marriage as facing challenges and is receptive to your efforts to provide a stable home for the children.

It is important to remember that just as you want your wife to be gentle and sensible and know how to run a household, your wife also hopes that you are considerate and sensitive. When something happens, our attribution is very important. Many people prefer external attribution, that is, they think that the fault lies with others, not themselves.

If you continue to attribute your difficulties to the actions of others, you may be overlooking your own role in the situation.

This kind of ideology can lead to the perception that everyone is problematic, and if one is stubborn, it can cause those around you to dislike being with you more and more. Over time, it's possible that the people around you may even want to escape and not want to have much contact.

Marriage is like two people rowing a boat. If they don't row in time with each other, they may find themselves staying in the same place and unable to reach the other side. It may be helpful for the two people in a marriage to reflect on themselves. When conflicts arise, it may be beneficial for them to consider how they can resolve the issues at hand in a constructive manner.

It might be helpful to consider what you could have done differently in this situation. Instead of focusing on your wife's shortcomings, it could be beneficial to reflect on how you could have handled things better.

Marriage is a family matter. There is no definitive right or wrong in family matters, but it is possible to empathize with the feelings of everyone involved.