Husband cheats, relationship with mother-in-law is bad, should I get a divorce?

Good morning, my name is Fei Yun, a heart exploration coach. I believe that life is a beautiful journey, not for appreciation, but for blossoming.

The situation you describe involves a husband who has been unfaithful, a three-year-old child, and a poor relationship with the mother-in-law. You are considering divorce. These few words convey the inner turmoil and conflict you are feeling.

From your perspective, the marriage is over. Your husband has engaged in infidelity, breached the marriage contract, violated your trust, and caused you emotional distress.

If the in-laws have something positive to contribute, it may also help to alleviate the sense of grievance and anger you feel. It should be noted that the relationship between husband and wife will affect the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law may escalate into conflicts between husband and wife.

From the perspective of a mother, the desire to provide a complete family for a child of three years of age is understandable. However, it is important to recognise that the essence of a family is not simply the presence of a father and mother, but rather the existence of harmonious relationships characterised by warmth and love.

It is only in such a family environment that children can grow up healthy and happy. Furthermore, only a good intimate relationship between husband and wife can provide more nourishment to children.

Parents play an important role in their children's lives, providing them with the psychological nourishment they need to grow up healthy in body and mind. This includes love, a sense of security, and a sense of worth.

If the couple lacks maturity and growth in a broken marriage, the children will bear the brunt of their parents' failed marriage, becoming the unwitting recipients of their parents' emotional distress.

In comparing the two rights, it is advisable to select the lesser of the two.

Prioritize your personal strengths.

Many women adhere to traditional mindsets, investing significant time and energy into their families and households after marriage and childbirth. This often results in a lack of self-care.

If the other party demonstrates remorse, if there is still room for maneuver in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and if you still wish to maintain the marriage, it would be advisable to implement improvements and begin anew.

If you have the confidence to implement changes in both yourself and the other party, you can still try your best. However, you should be fully prepared for the consequences of your actions. If the situation does not change, will you be able to maintain your new beliefs?

It is important to be your own strongest supporter and focus more on nurturing your children and strengthening yourself. One way to do this is to make new friends and learn a new skill.

Financial resources and a network of friends provide the means to maintain independence even in the absence of a marital union.

Use this incident as an opportunity to examine and enhance your conflict resolution abilities. Transform your experiences into valuable lessons that will help you become a more mature, resilient, and confident individual.

I hope the above is helpful to you. Best regards, [Your name] [Your title]

Should you wish to continue communicating, you are invited to follow my personal homepage, "Heart Exploration Service".

Hello. I give you a 360-degree hug.

This is a very tricky situation. It seems that no matter which option you choose, you will not be the winner. My advice is to weigh the pros and cons, know what you want most, and what compromises you are willing to make for what you want most.

You're asking whether you should get a divorce. This shows you're considering getting married. There are many practical considerations, though. If you have a child under three, you may be reluctant to get a divorce because you don't want to separate from your child. If you get a divorce, your life may be in trouble. If you don't get a divorce, your child may suffer. If you don't get a divorce, you'll still have the shell of a marriage. You'll still need to live alone as a single person.

In short, you will lose no matter what. You have to be rational and consider the reality, namely the financial aspect, and not emotional value.

This family has not given you much emotional value, and it is all draining you. You must first figure out your bottom line, for example, for the sake of your children.

If you can't bear to let your child go and you don't have enough financial resources to raise your child on your own, my advice is this: If your spouse is unwilling to divorce you and your husband's income can provide you and your child with stable financial support, then don't get divorced. Just treat your spouse as a cash machine.

If the other party is willing to pay sufficient child support, it is recommended to get a divorce. Divorce means cutting off a lot of responsibilities and obligations. For example, if the relationship with the mother-in-law is bad, as a wife, you have obligations to your husband. As a couple, you have a mutual obligation to support each other.

If you're ready to let go of your child and the other party can take good care of them, then get a divorce and leave your child with the other party. You can focus on earning money and visit your child more often during the holidays.

This must be agreed upon during the divorce and written in the divorce agreement to make it legally binding. If the other party obstructs and you can't handle it yourself, the law will support you.

You should spend more time with your children when you can afford it.

If you choose not to divorce, whether it is for the sake of the children or for the financial support that the other party can provide, you must build up your psychological strength and do not expect the other party to provide emotional value. In a marriage, each partner provides sexual, financial, and emotional resources to the other.

If the other party cheats and you choose not to divorce for the sake of the children, focus on the financial value that the other party can provide. Don't expect any sexual or emotional resources.

If the other party cannot provide financial value, it is not worth putting yourself through hardship for the sake of the children. Even if you get divorced, the children will not be hurt.

If the family relationship is bad, the child will suffer more.

If you choose to divorce and you have the means, you should get the child. The other party will not necessarily give it to you.

As a mother, I can tell you with certainty that I would not feel comfortable leaving my child with such a family. Be prepared for the possibility that the other party may not pay child support.

If you don't have enough money, don't have children yet. Work hard to earn money and visit your children more often. You don't need to worry about your children's development. Everyone has their own destiny.

If you're concerned about the other party obstructing you and speaking ill of you in front of the child, you can and should keep evidence of your efforts for the child, such as taking them out to play and buying them things. Leave evidence behind, and when the child grows up, they'll be able to tell right from wrong.

You will lose either way, so choose the option that causes you the least damage. You will definitely feel aggrieved, but you get to decide whether you want to feel aggrieved financially.

I advise you to prepare yourself for whatever may come your way.

Talk to a counselor.

I am a counselor who is often Buddhist and sometimes depressed, but I am also occasionally positive and motivated. The world and I love you.

You get married for happiness, and you get divorced for the same reason. You need to think about what you want most.