I'm terrified of communication. Why do my comments sometimes make people feel awkward and uncomfortable?

From the host's description, I can see the host's desire to communicate with the outside world in a kind manner. Despite the host's best efforts to express kindness, negative responses from others can lead to feelings of defeat, disappointment, and even self-hatred. I can sense an honest heart that longs to be treated kindly.

However, in the face of some harsh, rude, thoughtless, and irresponsible negative responses, I have experienced hurt and doubted the world, life, and myself.

I can see that the poster is still trying to explore, even though she is hurt, disappointed, sad, and angry. It seems that she is looking for a place where there will be more kind and thoughtful responses, a place that is more suitable for quietly exploring oneself rather than blaming oneself, and perhaps a place to practice deep communication and explore one's inner self, rather than just superficial responses to everyday life.

The original poster also said that most of the time, people are not offensive, which means that most of the time, most people do not bother themselves. In fact, most people are probably like the original poster, able to cope with ordinary life, but deep down inside, they may have some secret desires and doubts that they have nowhere to tell or get answers from for the time being.

Speaking well can express persistence and also hold onto others with kindness. This is probably an ability that many people would like to develop. However, it is likely that few people in the world can speak just right, like a classic script line. Most people are ordinary people who often say the wrong thing.

If you are unlucky enough to be hated, try to accept it. Learn from your mistakes and try to correct them. Growth is often a winding path of constantly discovering mistakes and then correcting them.

If you make a mistake, it might be helpful to let it go. It's also important to remember to keep moving forward.

You might find it helpful to read the book The Courage to Be Disliked, which may offer insights that resonate with you.

Hello, host. I'm Wuyu.

It's normal to worry about being hated by others.

When I started writing this, I was worried: would you read it? Would it disgust you?

Will you like my answer? If you don't like it, will I be embarrassed?

There will be a lot of drama, preconceptions, and fantasies.

[These fantasies are caused by past experiences.

I'm afraid you won't like my answer because someone else didn't like mine. I'm afraid you'll hate me because someone else chased me for 300 rounds.

I think you've had bad experiences in the past.

I want to hug you. You may have been hurt and it still hurts.

You may have liked a TV show, movie, or book and wanted to tell someone about it. But then that person said, "What did you watch?"

You may have felt emotions, wanted to share them, but the other person said they weren't important.

You may want to get close to someone, but they tell you to stay away.

You feel you can't change the world or other people's opinions, so you attack yourself and deny yourself.

But I want to tell you that the past is not the truth and every moment is new.

It's like answering your question.

The words, feelings, and reader are all new.

You'll only know if you like my writing or not if you like it or respond.

Every action is a bit like a card draw. I think I have a 10% chance of getting your approval. I try to polish my writing, which may increase the probability to 20%.

If I don't write this, the probability is 0%.

If you like it, the probability is now 100%.

Failure is important.

Use failure as a weapon against yourself and belittle yourself.

Failure can be useful in other ways.

Failure helps you understand your emotions and the situation.

If someone always belittles you, it doesn't mean you're bad. It means you hate him and don't want to be friends with someone like him.

Tell yourself, "I hate this person!"

This can help you avoid people like that in the future and find friends who make you happy.

Learn from your failures and protect yourself. Avoid using failure to hurt yourself.

I hope this helps.

The questioner indicated that, in most instances, communication with others is a natural and normal process. However, a situation that elicits feelings of fear is when others provide negative feedback. In one particular instance, the initial response was one of disgust. Disgust is typically associated with a physical sensation, whereas a psychological interpretation may be shame, which encompasses feelings of embarrassment or humiliation.

The act of naming one's feelings represents the initial step in the process of healing emotional pain.

The field of psychology posits that our language has the capacity to facilitate healing. When some of our internal experiences cannot be articulated in words, they often manifest as chaotic and painful emotions. This can result in a state of internal suffering, compounded by the inability of those around us to fully comprehend our distress. The initial step towards healing is the ability to identify and label the various experiences and feelings within us. To illustrate, when I mentioned the instance of saying the wrong thing and being met with silence or disgust, it is evident that a complex array of emotional and potentially physical experiences were occurring simultaneously. These could include unconscious frowning, nausea, a rapid heartbeat, and a flushed face. These reactions occurred rapidly and caught people off guard, resulting in intense discomfort.

It is imperative to identify and categorize the internal sensations and emotions that arise. This process allows for a deeper understanding of one's emotional state and the underlying causes. For instance, physical tension and frowning may indicate feelings of anxiety and tension, while nausea may correspond to feelings of anger. A rapid heartbeat may be a reaction to inner fear, and a flushed face may be an expression of embarrassment and shame. Naming these emotions allows for a more nuanced and accurate description of one's inner experiences.

As the ability to describe and name emotional experiences increases, the internal experience of ta becomes less overwhelming and chaotic. The capacity to articulate these experiences facilitates the healing process in interpersonal relationships.

It is possible for trauma to be concealed within the body.

The questioner indicated that this situation originated during his childhood, specifically in the fourth grade. You recalled that you were experiencing depressive symptoms at that time. It is unclear what you were going through, but it is possible that you were young and lacked the maturity to cope with the challenges you faced. Some of these experiences may have led to a traumatic event. If not addressed promptly and effectively, the trauma can manifest as physical symptoms and resurface when similar situations arise, potentially leading to a relapse into the painful emotions associated with that traumatic experience from years past.

The aforementioned observations are merely conjectures. To ascertain the underlying causes of one's personality traits, it is essential to conduct a more profound introspective analysis.

Finally, it is important to recognize your own resilience.

Our attention is often readily absorbed by strong stimuli, which can result in our focusing on pain to the exclusion of other experiences. This can lead to a lack of awareness of the positive aspects of our surroundings. Learning to identify and appreciate one's own resilience and positive qualities is an important skill that can help us navigate challenging situations more effectively.

You indicated that the majority of the time, communication in your interpersonal relationships is typical and that you must acknowledge this aspect of yourself, given that it occupies a significant portion of your time.

It is my sincere hope that you may find peace of mind. I am Shao Hanbiao, a counselor who is here to support you on your inner journey.

Hello! First, I'll give you a big, warm hug from afar!

I'm thrilled to have read your request for help! I'm excited to share some support and help. I also applaud you for being aware of the fear and unease you show in your relationships and your inability to communicate normally with others.

From your description, I can feel your internal inferiority, lack of self-confidence, and extreme lack of acceptance of yourself. The good news is that you can work on this! It's important to recognize that you don't have a clear awareness of this part of your inner self, which will make you unintentionally project the emotions of not accepting yourself inwardly onto the person you are dating. You think that he/she will not accept you either, so you become extremely sensitive in the relationship, paying special attention to the attitude and evaluation of others towards you, and are easily "hurt." What do you think?

And guess what? Our relationships with others are often a reflection of our relationship with ourselves. So, if you can't get along with your inner self and don't fully accept your true self, it's going to be tough for you to be true to yourself in relationships and express your feelings and needs sincerely, especially when you feel hurt.

So, here's the good news! You can change your current state in relationships by learning to accept yourself, building self-confidence, and enhancing your sense of self-worth. When you fully accept yourself from the inside out, believe that you are good enough, and know that you deserve to be treated well by yourself and others, you can truly be yourself in relationships.

You can learn to accept yourself better by making a list of your strengths. This will help you to see your shortcomings and inadequacies, but also your many bright spots and advantages. You can cultivate self-confidence and enhance your sense of self-worth by keeping a gratitude journal. Develop more interests and passions, so that you can control more and more things in your life.

While you're feeling afraid, try to be true to yourself in relationships and express your feelings and needs honestly. You've got this! You are good enough. Being rejected and denied is not because you are not good enough, but to a large extent, it only shows that other people's opinions and positions are different from yours. Because you also reject and deny others' rights and freedoms in relationships. What do you say?

I highly recommend reading "How to Overcome Social Anxiety."

I'm Lily, the little ear of the Q&A Museum! The world and I love you!