Is it a problem that I am a 32-year-old woman who has never been in love and has no friends of the opposite sex?

Hello! I feel your sadness. I want to hug you!

Some people say that women are financially independent and don't need men to do chores or have children. They can even have children without the help of men. It doesn't matter if they fall in love, get married, or have children – they are in control! Everyone is the master of their own life!

Each age group has different tasks and experiences. How can adults without love or sex experience love and sex?

If you don't have children at the right age, you can't experience parenthood.

Girl, 32 years old, it's not too late. Learn how to socialize and interact with others.

There should be more resources like this!

Don't waste time blaming yourself. Believe me, take the first step, and you will find yourself more and more!

I hope you will start learning and practicing soon! I hope you will share the beauty of love!

Best wishes!

Good day, I hope this message finds you well.

You appear to desire the ability to interact with individuals of the opposite sex in a normal manner. However, due to a lack of proficiency in social interaction skills, these interactions are not going as well as you would like. This has led you to question whether there is something inherently wrong with your personality. Understandably, this has caused you significant distress. As a result, you now believe that you will never be in a relationship. Additionally, your job search has not been going well, which has further exacerbated your frustration and disappointment.

In fact, in our daily lives, we often hear self-criticism like this: "I'm suspicious and always suspect others, which ruins relationships," "I'm too aloof and unsociable, so I'm not suitable for a relationship," and so on.

When we encounter these issues, we all feel distressed and want to implement changes. However, when we want to implement changes, we subconsciously identify our shortcomings and engage in self-criticism to eliminate them. This self-critical approach to change is not an optimal strategy.

Is there a less painful way to proceed? One possible approach is to use the following words: "a part of myself."

The use of "part" is a common and effective therapeutic technique in psychological counseling. When an issue is identified within oneself and a solution is sought, it can be challenging to see beyond the immediate problem due to its proximity. There is a risk of confusing the issue with the self.

Once we recognize that the issue is merely a component of our overall identity, we can gain a more holistic perspective.

What is the recommended course of action?

First, avoid defining yourself by your problems. Instead, describe the problematic behavior. For example: I lack experience and skills in dealing with the opposite sex, but that does not define my personality.

Secondly, it is important to recognise that the aspect of oneself that engages in problematic behaviour is only a part of the whole. For instance, a tendency towards withdrawal is only one aspect of an individual's character, and there are numerous other positive and appealing traits that contribute to their overall persona.

Third, identify and acknowledge the other aspects of your personality. For instance, despite my natural reticence to engage in social interaction, I am always willing to extend a helping hand when someone needs assistance.

As you become more aware of your other skills and abilities, you will find that the problems you have always struggled with will become less significant. You will gradually develop a more complete and nuanced understanding of yourself. This process is less painful than self-criticism and is more conducive to personal growth. It is a gentle and accepting approach that can also motivate individuals to discover other strengths and resources they possess.

This is to clarify that the aforementioned characteristics are merely transient and do not represent the individual's overall identity. The following sentence succinctly encapsulates the concept of multifaceted personalities.

It is important to recognize that you possess a multitude of qualities and abilities, not just those that are immediately apparent. You are not defined by a single trait or characteristic. The crucial aspect is recognizing this for yourself. If you find yourself caught up in excessive self-criticism and labeling yourself with negative labels, I would like to share two strategies for identifying other aspects of your personality.

First, identify an individual within your inner circle who you trust and request their input on your situation and behavior from an external perspective. This individual is intimately acquainted with you, yet possesses a degree of objectivity that can facilitate a comprehensive assessment.

Secondly, you may wish to consider drawing the negative part, providing a description of its name, appearance, experiences and messages.

When this challenging aspect of your personality is documented, you may realize that although it originates from you, it is not the entirety of your identity. Each of us has both strengths and weaknesses, and we all have aspects of ourselves that we would prefer to avoid. However, we also possess positive attributes and capabilities.

The process of improvement is not about attacking, criticizing, or doubting oneself. It is not about trying to eliminate negative traits. Instead, it is about allowing these traits to exist and focusing on discovering other aspects of oneself. For example, if one is an introvert who is not particularly skilled at communication, one can focus on the areas in which one excels, such as research and development, design, programming, art, and other occupations that do not require much communication.

I hope this information is helpful to you and I wish you a happy life.