I've fallen out with a friend of seven years, and I feel so sad. Was it my fault? What should I do?

Hello, question asker.

From what you've said, you and your friend were really close before, but after your friend got a boyfriend, your relationship changed and you're feeling pretty confused. You're not sure what to do.

I can see that you're grateful for your friend's support in the past and have reciprocated to show your appreciation. However, after your friend got a boyfriend, you shared everything with each other, but your friend didn't value it.

I think your friend may not care about you as much as she used to after she got a boyfriend. You also have some kind of dependency on her. It seems like your friend doesn't value your friendship as much as she used to. After she got a boyfriend, she gradually became indifferent to you and stopped replying to your messages. This is actually disrespectful behavior towards you and also towards your friendship.

From these minor issues, you may have also felt your friend was neglecting you and spending a lot of time with his boyfriend. You also feel neglected, and your friend is gradually distancing himself from you. However, when these things happen, your friend thinks it is your fault and that you don't treat him as a friend. Then I don't think you don't treat him as a friend, but that he ignores your feelings and position, and will put the blame on you. I personally don't think he values you as a friend.

Of course, if we've given everything and found that our friends still don't value us, we can actually stop. We've taken the initiative and given to such friends, but if they don't treat us as friends, we can also choose to leave. There are many people in the world that we meet and part with. Although you've experienced some sad days, if you don't share the same goals and values, it is not realistic to be friends for life. So for now, you can analyze yourself and your friends to see if you can be friends, or if you can calm down and analyze the current situation together and then actively solve the problem.

In my opinion, true friends don't worry about suspicions or trivial matters. As long as two people treat each other sincerely and with genuine kindness, can support each other in critical moments, and can give each other timely responses, I believe this kind of friendship is true friendship. Of course, everyone has a different idea of what makes a good friend. The questioner needs to explore, understand, and then make friends who are truly worth it.

I hope this helps.

Hello, I'm Yan Shiqi, and I'm happy to answer your question.

From what you've written, it seems like a one-off session of nonviolent communication between you and your friend would do the trick.

Before your best friend got a boyfriend, you two were pretty close. But when your friend got a boyfriend, you felt a bit neglected. You got through the separation period by adapting to the situation.

If your friend is still comparing the relationship to the past, she might feel like you've changed and think your relationship has become distant.

The truth is, there hasn't been a big change in your relationship. It's just a shift in how you interact with each other.

It would be a good idea for you both to sit down and have a chat. You can agree on a way of getting along with each other during this period.

It's like you're getting to know each other again. When the situation changes a little, you'll find a new way of getting along.

When both people are on the same page, they'll naturally avoid complaining about each other or feeling negative emotions.

This is a great way to handle change.

It's not just friendships that change. Family relationships and romantic relationships change too. The good news is that you can agree on a way to get along with anyone, at any time.

As long as the general principles are followed—that is, there is no qualitative conflict between the two people's values—these can be resolved.

That's my take on it. I hope it helps.

It seems like this recent fight with your friend has been going on for a while.

Your friend ignored you because she was in a relationship, and you got used to it.

Your friend said you ignored her because of something that happened recently.

You both blame each other.

It's hard to know who's right or wrong in a friendship.

If someone's circumstances change, the way you get along with them will change too.

Relationships change.

In a good relationship, both people are honest and respect each other.

You had already planned your exam schedule.

When she asked, you could have told her.

"I didn't know you were going with me. I've already booked my trip."

She feels bad because not going with you means being rejected.

Tell her, "Let's meet up and talk about it. We can support each other."

You could say, "Let's go out after the exam."

Tell her that going to the exam together won't affect your relationship.

Your response to her showed you were emotional.

Maybe she was cold for a long time.

Maybe she doesn't consider you a friend.

She questioned your friendship.

You felt resentful, angry, and disappointed.

These feelings make you angry.

Talk to your friend about how you really feel.

"We were both busy and didn't think about your exam."

"You're still my friend, and this won't change just because we didn't take the exam together."

"When you were busy, I felt sad. I had to adapt. Now I'm more independent."

It's bad to lose face. You feel weak when you say something angry and then apologize.

This may also be an important stage in your friendship. You'll both find a new way of getting along.

Someone who takes the initiative to maintain a relationship is not inferior. They do so because they want to.

When we try our best, we can accept the result.

Your relationship might get better, or an apology might not bring back the friendship. Either way, you'll feel better.

Hope this helps.

Hello!

I can see where you're coming from.

You don't think you did anything wrong, but you're not sure if you should apologize. You're not sure how the other person will react, and you're worried about being rejected.

Take a step back and view yourself from a new perspective.

You said you were 22, had few friends, and were someone who would take the initiative to make close friends. You also said you would take the initiative to admit your mistakes, even if things went wrong.

So, the picture here is that you're worried about being isolated, you want to build a genuine connection, and you're looking forward to being accepted.

So you're willing to be the one who takes the initiative.

The questioner is passionate at heart, but they've built up a lot of defenses.

I agree with the questioner that friendship is important. It's a kind of relationship, and the more relaxed you are in it, the more relaxed the relationship will become.

If you don't feel relaxed and are feeling pressured, it'll make the relationship more difficult.

I don't know if you've ever been neglected by your parents, but I know you have a lot of passion for them.

This makes you afraid that, as their child, your position is being taken over because they can't protect you with their sincere gaze and warm hands.

So you're enthusiastic one minute and cautious the next.

The questioner made some comparisons between her friend's boyfriend and her relationship with her friend, like how often they meet and how quickly they reply to messages.

You were disappointed on the inside, which led to some issues.

You re-established your relationship with your parents.

2. Friendship is a two-way street.

The questioner is upset about the difference in their friendship and feels like they're not being valued as much.

He kept his cool and answered his friend's question in a less direct way.

Afterwards, the questioner felt a little guilty about how her friend reacted.

In the novel Nirvana in Fire, Xiao Jingrui and Yan Yujin are lifelong friends.

Yan Yujin has night blindness, so Xiao Jingrui goes to the bottom of the well to help him find the Jadeite Pendant.

Yan Yujin joked, "This is the perfect time to give me a compliment."

Xiao Jingrui replied, "Believe it or not, I'm going to go up there and smear you with mud."

The relationship is relaxed, and you can joke around with each other.

If you already feel uncomfortable, forcing a rationalization and forcing a smile will only make you feel worse.

3. Use the time you have alone to grow.

Maybe you felt angry before.

You might even feel remorse.

It's important to recognize and accept these emotions, both in the past and in the present. Allow yourself to embrace the naturalness and authenticity of your emotions.

You mentioned exams, so I just wanted to wish you the best of luck.

When you're on your own, you'll realize how much you miss your friends. It's also important to take some time for self-reflection.

You can choose who you want to be friends with.

Choose how you can help each other grow in the context of change. Choose to express your feelings.

The "apology thought" you're currently aware of seems to be more like a temporary fix to ease the inner conflict, which makes you feel like you can gain some security in return.

We need to recognize that this kind of security isn't really solid or secure.

Don't suppress your feelings about events and people that have affected you. Explore the trajectory of spiritual growth.

I believe that friendships can bring vitality and beauty, even if they gain or lose something along the way.

Forget the stereotypes and start from the heart.

Hello, my friend! Let me give you a hug!

From what you've said, I can see that you're a flexible and resilient person. When your friend got a boyfriend and started to neglect you, you felt a bit uncomfortable at first, but then you gradually built up your mental strength, adjusted your perception, and came to understand and appreciate your friend. You also took the time to reflect on your own personality traits, such as attachment and dependence, and gradually reduced your dependence on your friend by taking action, comforting yourself, solving your problems independently, and reducing the frequency of communication with your friend so as not to disturb her. So, I want to praise you for your thoughtfulness, empathy, adaptability, action, as well as your ability to reflect and self-awareness!

Next is your female friend. She may not realize that she's been neglected, but she does care that you're not as dependent on her and that you're not communicating as frequently. She mistakenly believes that you're no longer as close as you once were. I have to say that you're both very lovely girls. You're both guessing at each other's thoughts without naming or revealing them. This is the loveliness of girls: they're subtle, but it's also a place that's prone to misunderstandings.

It's not just between girls, but also between men and women, partners, classmates, and colleagues. When problems arise, it's important to communicate them in a timely manner instead of speculating. In fact, many things are actually simpler when discussed.

Your female friend may have ignored you for a while because she had a boyfriend, but her reaction now shows that she's always been thinking about you. She may have predicted that your dissatisfaction would result from her neglect, and the fact that you've reduced the frequency of communication with her just confirms her thoughts. This has always been her worry, and now it's come true, which makes her feel bad. This makes her explode at this point in time when she's taking exams. First, there's the pressure of the exams themselves; second, things may not be going well between her and her boyfriend; and third, she feels that she may lose you as a close friend. Emotions such as panic, irritability, pressure, dissatisfaction, and confusion pile up, and so an argument breaks out between you.

I think it would be a good idea for you and your friend

After the exam, arrange to meet and talk openly. The exam pressure will be off for a while, so you can meet up. You can tell her directly and honestly how much you depend on her and why your relationship has changed. Just as you told the counselor, tell your friend what you told her.

You've had a deep relationship, and you've helped and supported each other when you needed it most, which shows that your hearts are connected. If you talk openly about things, you'll definitely understand each other better.

If you're feeling shy about meeting up in person, you can always use words, just as you do on the Yi Xinli platform to confide in your friend.

You're hesitant to speak up because you've placed this friend in a higher position than everyone else. You view her differently from others. When you care about someone, their actions affect you more, and misunderstandings and hurt feelings are more likely to occur.

If you can understand this, you'll understand your true feelings for this friend and your strong desire for this friendship. So, be brave. Speak up for the sake of someone you value. Don't let shyness or embarrassment get in the way of a friendship. Speak out about your emotions, concerns, and what you're feeling. Listen to what she has to say. You might hear something different from what you expected.

Let's give a big cheer for friendship!

Good morning,

It is acceptable to receive physical affection. It is important not to overstress or blame oneself. In any relationship, both parties must work through the process together. Only through true mutual acceptance and genuine understanding can the relationship be maintained and advanced.

Do I lack sufficient understanding of her perspective?

Recently, she has a boyfriend, and at work, I have observed that whenever I share something with her or tell her about my worries, she either says a few words or does not reply. Additionally, she does not share the interesting things in her daily life with me.

There are occasions when we do not communicate verbally for several days. While I feel somewhat neglected, I believe she is preoccupied with other commitments or engaged in conversation with her boyfriend. I do not believe that close friends are required to communicate daily. I therefore take comfort in this belief and feel better.

I am attempting to develop the habit of processing my concerns independently. As a result, I have begun to respond to her messages and share details of my life at a similar rate to how she responds to me. I have not explicitly informed her of this change in approach, as I was concerned that she might dwell on the issue and perceive me as uncooperative.

From the events that have transpired, it is evident that the questioner has demonstrated a commitment to friendship and loyalty, assuming the role of an active listener and exhibiting a profound sense of empathy. Consequently, they are adept at fostering a sense of security and intimacy within their relationships. However, when their selfless "silent giving" is not reciprocated, they experience feelings of hurt, nervousness, and unease. However, they refrain from expressing these emotions to avoid creating conflict. The real conflict arises when the same area of interest results in a convergence of their lives. The questioner's silent endurance and the other person's feelings of "neglect and "being neglected" emerge simultaneously. This is not unexpected, given that both parties have overlooked the necessity of mutual trust for genuine understanding in a relationship.

It is therefore inaccurate to attribute the entirety of the problem to the questioner. Both parties have not performed to an adequate standard. For the questioner, while maintaining independence is important in getting along with friends, we also need to learn to express our feelings without trying to be perfect all the time. For friends, in this relationship, "putting emphasis on romantic relationships and neglecting friendships" requires a certain degree of control, otherwise not only will friends not understand you, but everyone around you will also feel left out and gradually fade away from the relationship.

1. Learn to express your emotions.

When I feel uncomfortable, please don't forget that you have the right to express your feelings. The reason we are afraid to express is that we are worried about being rejected by the other person, which will result in negative emotions. However, if you don't express, the other person will not really know what is going on, and may make a wrong judgment. When the other person cannot feel a positive response, and you cannot look at this matter positively, a rift in the relationship will appear.

Therefore, if the questioner truly cares about the other person and is aware of their emotional state, they should not simply state, "Your response makes me feel sad because I require your support." If the other person values the questioner, they will be receptive to the request and understand its purpose.

2. Enhance your interpersonal skills.

While demonstrating empathy and active listening in interactions can foster a sense of security and trust, it is also essential to receive a genuine response and active listening from the other party. By understanding our own emotions and those of others, we can facilitate more effective listening and communication. When both parties comprehend each other's genuine needs, they can adjust their words and actions in a timely manner, alleviate mental strain, and enhance trust.

3. Prioritize self-care and cultivate a positive experience of communication with others.

Low social trust can impede communication and openness. However, individuals who feel supported and understood in communication may exhibit more expressive behavior than expected, which can foster deeper relationships. When an individual feels inferior and believes they cannot receive genuine recognition and support from others, they may remain on guard, lacking the courage and confidence to address conflicts and problems. The more they avoid them, the more anxious they become.

It is akin to a friend who persistently inquires, "Are you avoiding introspection and reluctant to confront your own thoughts and actions?" The individual in question can readily accept this inquiry and respond constructively. However, due to the disapproval of the words and actions of a past associate, the individual is unable to express an answer that refutes their own beliefs, leading to a psychological avoidance of conflict.

However, this approach will not yield the desired result. The individual in question must learn to communicate effectively with their colleagues and gain some positive communication experiences in order to address their own concerns and those of the other person, expressing their feelings without resorting to accusations. If the other person expresses surprise and confusion, this can be discussed in person at a later stage. If they are unable to understand and the other person holds them responsible, this is a matter for the other person to resolve.

Do not be afraid to set boundaries. Those who are genuinely interested in forming a connection with you deserve a genuine connection in return.

Best regards,

Each individual serves as a source of illumination, whether by posing inquiries or offering responses. Through the medium of language, we can shed light on the minds of others, and this is the energy we disseminate.

Greetings, I am Xin Tan, your coach Fei Yun. It is evident that you are experiencing distress due to the recent discord with your closest friend. You perceive that the emergence of a romantic interest in her life has precipitated a subtle yet significant shift in the dynamics of your relationship, leading to heightened sensitivity and a renewed focus on the nature of your friendship with her.

This concern contributes to your reluctance to engage with her, your relationship, and the subsequent conflict. It is recommended that you maintain a safe distance while addressing the issue.

1. Due to your concern for the situation, you are exercising additional caution.

Is it your impression that, during your childhood, the greater the degree of concern expressed by your parents about your safety, the more likely you were to engage in risky behaviors that could result in injury?

It is precisely because your parents were overly worried that they unconsciously projected this worry and anxiety onto their child, and the child used their behavior to fulfill their parents' fears.

You have a limited number of friends and a close relationship with her. Intimate within your own consciousness, you regard her as your most trusted and closest associate.

However, the sudden appearance of her boyfriend disrupted the tacit understanding, harmony, and intimacy that had previously existed between you.

Such considerations have also crossed your mind: "I am a third party, I cannot destroy my friend's love." It is more accurate to describe your disposition as "self-conscious" rather than "sensitive." As you have previously stated, you have "few friends, and in order to make close friends, you will be a very proactive person."

You exhibit a lack of confidence, a desire for understanding, acceptance, and approval, and a fear that others do not like you. You frequently engage in behaviors intended to gain the favor of others.

An individual's self-confidence is closely associated with their sense of worth. Those who possess a high sense of self-worth are confident in their abilities and do not feel the need to "prove" themselves through their actions.

Those with a low sense of self-worth tend to seek external validation and affirmation from others to bolster their sense of value.

In the absence of external validation, individuals may develop self-doubt and self-negation, leading to the formation of negative self-perceptions such as feelings of unworthiness and exclusion. This can result in feelings of loneliness, as well as an inability to form positive relationships with others due to an inability to give and receive positive regard.

2. Prioritize personal growth and pursue self-care.

You have developed an awareness of your own emotional needs and the importance of self-reliance. This realization marks a significant step towards emotional maturity and the capacity to manage your emotions independently. This is a commendable achievement, as it signifies your readiness to embark on a journey of personal growth and autonomy.

Recognition from others can assist in the development of a sense of worth, which is often sought externally. An alternative approach is to pursue this sense of worth internally, through the processes of learning and personal growth. This can facilitate the development of self-love and self-connection. As this sense of worth increases, confidence is likely to grow, and external opinions are less likely to affect emotional states.

As a result of self-assurance and an understanding of one's intrinsic value, unexpected comments are unlikely to have a significant impact.

Every individual enters our lives to assist us in attaining significant life lessons. Even parents cannot remain with us indefinitely. This is particularly true of friends. By examining your relationship with her and your interaction patterns, you can discern your own patterns.

Identify your own life lesson and pursue it with dedication. It may entail developing courage and confidence, or cultivating self-love and enhancing emotional intelligence. In essence, it is a valuable asset in your relationship with her.

It would be prudent to adopt a bold and confident demeanor, and to take the initiative to communicate with her. It is important to consider that she is merely a transient companion on the journey of life; therefore, it would be beneficial to cherish the present connection.

One may also learn meditation, writing methods, and books that are beneficial to one's physical and mental health and growth.

It is my sincere hope that the aforementioned information will prove beneficial to you and to the world at large.

Should you wish to continue the communication, you are invited to click on the link entitled "Find a coach," which can be found in the upper right-hand corner or at the bottom of the page. This will enable you to engage in further dialogue and growth with me on an individual basis.

Hello, question asker! I'm Jiang 61, and I'm here to help.

Thank you so much for trusting us and sharing your heart with us in search of a solution. It's so hard when we fall out with friends, isn't it? I'd love to help you figure out whose fault it is and what you can do to make things right.

Let's take a look at the actual problem, analyze it, and find a solution together.

1. Personality

1. Your personality

You're a 22-year-old woman with a few friends. You're proactive and eager to make close friends. You're even willing to admit your mistakes when things have soured. I can relate! I've also fallen out with a good friend I've had for seven years. I don't have the courage to go to her, either.

From reading your first paragraph, I get the impression that you have few friends, so I can imagine how much you value the friendships you have made. You are empathetic, introverted, sensitive, and a bit stubborn, which makes you an interesting person!

And you'll go out of your way to make friends by pleasing others. I also noticed that you might feel a bit inferior and lack confidence, which is totally normal!

I'm not sure if your personality is affected by your upbringing. It seems like you and a friend you've known for seven years have had a falling out, and you're feeling unsure about going to her to make up.

I read your detailed supplement at the end, and I totally get what you're saying. Your relationship with friends should definitely be related to your personality!

If you have a melancholy personality, you might find this description helpful!

People with a melancholic personality tend to have a few things in common.

You're a thoughtful, highly sensitive, idealistic person who is in pursuit of truth, goodness, and beauty.

You've got some great strengths! You're sensitive, loyal, talented, and insightful.

On the other hand, there are a few things that could use some work. You might be a little stubborn, indecisive, self-centered, pessimistic, or passive.

From what you've told me, it seems like you might have a melancholic personality.

A lovely, pleasing personality!

People with a pleasing personality are often very caring and thoughtful. They may worry about upsetting others or seem to try to please everyone around them. They often care deeply about what others think and may even worry about causing trouble for others.

You have a kind and gentle heart, but you also have a fear of conflict.

You're not the best at saying no or making demands, which is totally okay!

You get a little upset easily, and I know you worry about what others think of you.

You have a lovely, agreeable personality. When someone gets angry or there's a disagreement, you're quick to admit your mistake and show kindness to win back the friendship. This is also a side of you that could use a little more confidence.

2. Your friend's personality

We used to live together and we were like sisters! We never confirmed that we were each other's best friends, but we were definitely there for each other. She was so caring and helped me a lot when I was feeling down during my exam preparation. I also tried very hard to care for her.

From what you've told me, it seems like your friend's personality is quite similar to yours. She's got some of the same traits as you, but she's also got her own unique qualities.

For example, she'll go out of her way to care for and help you when you're feeling down. After accepting help from others, you said it was "very hard" to care for her.

This is where you differ. It's totally understandable! We all have our own unique personalities, and it's clear that you're a self-centered person, which means you rarely care about others.

After making this friend, you also care for and help her in return. She's a very sensitive person, and she senses the changes in your relationship, even though she doesn't say anything.

Because you two are so similar, people tend to gravitate towards each other, and your friendship just kind of grew and grew over the years!

2. Why things fell apart

1. Changes in the relationship

It's totally normal for your friend's relationship with you to change a little bit after she gets a boyfriend. Here's what you can expect:

It's totally normal for friends to send fewer or no text messages sometimes.

They don't share their life's interesting stories with you, which is totally understandable!

It's totally normal for daily conversations to gradually become less frequent, and for there to be a few days between speaking.

It's totally normal to feel a bit uncomfortable and upset when your friend seems to be ignoring you. It's natural to have all kinds of thoughts and even start to complain.

2. Your opinion

It's totally understandable! Your friend is busy with her boyfriend and can't reply to text messages or share interesting things in time.

Self-comfort: The best friends don't have to talk every day.

I've also been thinking about how I might be coming across as a bit too dependent on her, and that I might be feeling a bit neglected. I'm trying to work through all these tricky emotions on my own for now, as I don't want to burden my friend with my thoughts.

From what you've shared, it's clear you're invested in the nuances of your friendship. You've taken steps to understand her perspective and find ways to comfort yourself.

But, deep down, you felt ignored and tried to calm your troubled emotions by doing your own thing. This was your way of showing how unhappy you were with her approach.

3. How to turn things around

Because you were feeling a bit resentful, you ended up treating her the same way she had treated you. It's a bit of a vicious cycle, isn't it? You didn't reply to her messages and didn't share your life with her, just as she had done to you.

It's clear that at this time, even though you didn't say it directly, your actions showed that you were upset with her and were using this technique to get back at your friend. Your friend also felt it, but neither of you broke the ice.

I really feel for you. If only you'd discovered the conflict at that time and taken the time to sort things out face-to-face, it would have prevented your friend from saying hurtful things when she was not in a calm frame of mind. I'm sure you'll agree that you lacked timely, effective, and good communication.

4. Things got a little more intense between you and your friend.

I totally get it.

Because the test center for your exam is in the same city as your friend's, you arranged your own travel arrangements for the exam without consulting your friend. When you discussed how to get to the exam, you didn't tell your friend the real reason for your arrangements, but I'm sure it was for a good reason!

So, when you were chatting, your friend didn't quite understand why you were acting the way you were, which made past disagreements seem even more intense.

My friend's thoughts on the matter:

Your friend felt a bit ignored when she saw your response, and she started sharing her thoughts and feelings about the subtle changes in your relationship and what she was thinking during this chat.

You didn't want to go with her, saying that your feelings towards her had changed and that you felt you could end things with her whenever you wanted.

I can see how you might be feeling. It's totally understandable. Your thoughts

I totally get it. I think the reason you didn't tell your friend was...

The test areas are all in the same city district, but the test locations are different. We both had to get up early to go to the city on the day of the test. I also wanted to go alone, so I didn't tell her. I thought that the test was all that mattered and that not going together wouldn't affect our relationship, so I didn't think much of it.

It's possible you didn't realize that what your friend cared about at that moment was whether you would go with her. This shows that you still cared about her and were thinking about her. In fact, what she really cared about was whether your relationship was still good.

Let's dig a little deeper to find the heart of the matter.

It seems like you're both caught up in your own thoughts, which can lead to misunderstandings. I know you were trying to explain further, but your subsequent explanation might have come across as an excuse for your own grievances.

Even someone on the outside would think you were speaking angrily without meaning to hurt the other person. But the actual effect is even more hurtful.

I just said that I had planned something myself, and I couldn't really say that I didn't want to go with her, because that would be even worse for her.

She also said, "Oh, why don't you explain to her why you're not going, sweetie?"

I said, "I'm sorry, I don't think there's anything to explain. I'm not her boyfriend, I wouldn't do anything bad. She didn't tell me in advance that we were going to be together. I had already booked a hotel and had a backup plan to either stay at the hotel the night before or have my family drive me there that day.

I ended up saying things like, "I thought you could understand me, but if you don't, no problem! We can just agree to disagree." It was also a bit of an angry remark, but I was just feeling a little frustrated.

I really felt for you after reading your conversation.

First, I think we could all benefit from discussing the matter in a more dispassionate manner. It seems we're arguing over every little thing, focusing on one or two words and interpreting the issue from our own perspective.

Secondly, it seems that you and your partner don't always feel able to communicate openly with each other. This can make it difficult to understand each other's feelings, and can result in words being spoken in a way that isn't as kind as they could be.

Third, it seems like you're not communicating effectively in a state of congruent communication, hoping only that the other person will understand you.

I think what's happening is that you're focusing on your own feelings, which is totally understandable, but it might be helpful to also consider the other person's feelings. It's possible that there's a communication gap, which is something we can work on together.

3. How can we work together to find a solution?

I think I can understand these things, but she just can't. Now several days have passed and we haven't spoken. Now that I think about it, it really hurts. I don't know what to do. This time I just couldn't bring myself to go and see her. Have I really done something wrong? Could someone please give me some advice?

You're still the same understanding person I've always known and loved. I know it can be hard to understand why your friend can't stand in your shoes and see your thoughts and situation, but I can see that you've stopped trying to please others and have become someone who wants to face problems and solve them.

It's so important to remember that you're still the same empathetic person, even if your friend can't stand in your shoes and understand your thoughts and situation. It's great to see that you've stopped trying to please others and have become someone who wants to face problems and solve them.

You're doing great! Give yourself a pat on the back for growing up!

It's totally normal to feel a little blue when you don't speak for a few days. It's so sad when a good friendship like yours, which has stood the test of time, gets a little rocky. It just goes to show that you don't have enough trust in each other, which is totally understandable.

And, coupled with the lack of good communication, this has really made things worse. But, there is still hope! Can it be fixed and the broken mirror reunited?

I'd love to offer you a bit of advice!

1. Build up a sense of trust

When you're trying to repair a friendship with someone you care about, it's really important to make sure you can trust each other.

And be honest with each other, my dear friend.

Be honest and open with your friends. If something unpleasant happens, choose a good time to talk and repeat what happened.

It's so important to express your feelings when you're feeling them, to share your understanding of the situation and how you handled it, and to be honest about any misunderstandings or actions you might have taken during the problem-solving process. Striving for mutual understanding is a great way to build a strong, loving bond with your friends!

We're here for each other, and we trust each other!

It's so important to trust each other! Be honest with each other about things that matter to you both. And if you make a promise, keep it! Don't let others down.

Do things that make each other trust each other. When problems arise, you can help each other, and we'll get through them together!

It's always there for you, through thick and thin.

No matter what, always believe that your friends are the most trustworthy people. They can always trust you, too! Always do your best to be trustworthy.

We all want to be there for our friends, so let's make sure we don't let them down!

2. Effective Communication

Communication is all about sharing information with each other. It's the whole process of sending a message to someone and hoping they'll respond the way you want them to. If you're able to do that, you've got effective communication!

Communication is made up of both verbal and non-verbal messages. It's often the case that the non-verbal part is more important than the verbal part. This includes things like body language, eye contact, facial expressions, and so on.

From what you've told me, it seems like there might be a bit of a communication breakdown. It's totally normal to forget to consider the other person's point of view sometimes, but when that happens, it can make things feel a bit awkward.

I'd like to share with you a four-step method for effective communication.

I can see that you're feeling a bit overwhelmed right now. It's totally normal to feel this way when things get hectic. I'm here to help you through this.

It's so important to remember that when we're communicating, it's not about the emotions, but the feelings.

Step 2: It's so important to express what you want, not what you don't want. It's also good to express that you are angry, rather than just expressing anger.

Step 3: It's so important to express your needs, not just your complaints. It can be really hard to let the other person know what you want, but it's so worth it!

Step 4: Think about where you want to go, not where you've been. Focus on the end result, not the event itself.

In your dialogue, you expressed your emotions rather than feelings. This made it difficult for the other person to understand your feelings, so they responded with emotions. In the second step, you didn't explain what you wanted, but rather blamed and expressed your anger. This made the other person feel uncomfortable, so they responded with anger.

Third, you got a little sidetracked by a word or two, and what was explained didn't quite match what was intended. This led to a bit of a misunderstanding, and you ended up attacking each other, which was unfortunate. Fourth, it would have been helpful to explain the purpose of your visit instead of dwelling on the incident.

However, when you change the way you express yourself and repeat the same thing, the effect will be different.

3. Emotion Management

It's so important to manage your emotions well, whether you're with friends, teachers, classmates, relatives, or friends. It's a great way to keep up good interpersonal relationships! Emotion management is all about recognizing emotions, accepting emotions, expressing emotions, and cultivating emotions.

It's so important to recognize your emotions!

This is the first step in managing your emotions. When you feel an emotion, take a moment to recognize what it is: anxiety, anger, sadness, etc.

It's so important to accept your emotions.

It's so important to remember that healthy emotions are those that match up with what's going on around us. When you're feeling what's going on in the moment, the best thing you can do is to tell yourself, "This is totally normal," and then just accept your feelings.

This way of thinking will help you feel less stressed and more relaxed.

It's so important to be able to express our emotions!

When we express our emotions, we're simply letting others know how we're feeling. It's all about being honest and open. We often say "I...", or "My feelings...", to let others in on what we're experiencing.

Cultivating emotions

I know it can be tough to handle all kinds of emotions, but you've got this! With a little bit of practice, you can learn to manage your emotions and grow stronger.

1) Try to lead a regular life. This will help keep your emotions nice and stable!

2) Develop your hobbies, let positive emotions drive you, love yourself and life, and feel the beauty of life!

(3) Learn to care for and look after others, let love dwell in your heart, help others to help themselves, and you'll have a happy life!

4) Spend more time in nature! It'll open up your mind and soothe your emotions, making them more stable.

5) It's so important to have good, trustworthy friends and spend time with people who are emotionally stable. This will really help to reduce any emotional interference and fluctuations.

My dear questioner, I hope these suggestions will be of some inspiration to you!

Wishing you all the best!