Hello. Your boyfriend cheated on you, your best friend broke up with you, and you feel insecure. You don't trust yourself or others, and you are anxious. You don't know how to adjust to your situation.
People who lack security often lack self-awareness. They need others' approval and blame others for their failures. They feel empty and confused.
You will feel insecure about things you can't control. You will live in tension and anxiety, and it will be hard to relax. You will feel like you've done something wrong, but you're not sure what. You will become more critical and extreme.
This situation is related to the father figure in the original family. If a girl's father was present and loving, she will feel secure.
Such a girl will be more courageous and optimistic. She will be brave and say "no" to anything that offends her. This is because of the love she received from her father during her childhood. She believes she can be brave and worthy of love.
If you don't have a stable core, you'll keep searching. How can you fix this? First, love yourself. Build a strong, consistent self.
Accept yourself, recognize yourself, respect your own merits, and tolerate your shortcomings. Pay attention to your feelings and understand your negative thoughts. Face your emotions.
Set goals, be independent, and improve yourself. When you shine, you will attract people who appreciate you. You can only take the first step by getting rid of what is holding you back.
Despite past traumas, you must repair your relationship with yourself. Re-connect with the child within who needs your love. Be independent. When you are stable, you will be confident and calm.
These personal views are for reference only. I hope they help!


Comments
I can understand how distressing this situation must be for you. It's important to address these feelings of anxiety and try to resolve them. Maybe reaching out to a professional counselor could provide some guidance and help you gain perspective on your concerns.
It sounds like this has been a heavy burden on you for quite some time. Have you considered talking to someone about it, perhaps a trusted friend or a family member? Sometimes sharing our worries can lighten the load and give us clarity on what steps to take next.
Reflecting on past experiences is natural, but it seems these thoughts are affecting your present life significantly. Could trying to engage in mindfulness or meditation help you stay more grounded in the present moment? These practices might ease your anxieties and improve your daily experience.
It's really tough when we feel like we're being judged or talked about. Building up your selfconfidence might help counteract those negative feelings. Engaging in activities that you enjoy and excel at can boost your selfesteem and make you less concerned with what others might think.
Given that this issue stems from college days, revisiting that environment might offer closure. Maybe attending a university event or reconnecting with classmates who were not involved could change your perspective and reduce your fear of what others may say.