Good day. I extend my support and encouragement in the form of a 360-degree hug.
After reviewing your inquiry, I would like to suggest a book for your consideration. The title is "Can a Child Who Has Grown Up Bruised and Scratched Recover on Their Own?" This book is also available in traditional Chinese characters. It has not yet been published in mainland China, but it will be interpreted at the Yixinli Reading Club. I believe it is an excellent resource for you, and I encourage you to attend the event to learn more.
This book is designed to assist individuals who have experienced childhood trauma in overcoming the challenges associated with it, understanding its underlying causes, and effectively addressing and healing it. It also serves as a comprehensive parenting guide, providing insights into the essential nourishment that young lives require for their optimal development. We believe this book will be a valuable resource for you. You can access an interpretation of this book at the Yixinli Reading Club.
Regarding the paperback edition, we have checked the major online retailers and are unable to confirm its availability at this time. However, it is currently available for pre-sale.
There are typically multiple avenues for recovery from trauma.
First, it is essential to rebuild positive interpersonal relationships.
Trauma is essentially a lack of stable, safe, warm, and controllable interpersonal relationships during the growth process. As a result, healing also occurs in interpersonal relationships, where new experiences are gained in positive interpersonal relationships, and the neural circuits of the brain are reshaped, thus achieving the desired effect.
If you require assistance in developing positive interpersonal relationships, we recommend engaging the services of a qualified counselor.
Secondly, it is advisable to seek social support from alternative sources.
For instance, volunteering provides the opportunity to engage in interpersonal relationships through service.
Join a support group to connect with individuals who share similar experiences, offer mutual understanding, encouragement, and warmth, contribute your own strengths, integrate, and engage in positive interpersonal relationships.
You are already married, and your husband will be a valuable source of support. However, it is unclear how empathetic and understanding your husband is. If possible, I recommend pursuing family therapy. With the guidance of a counselor, you can effectively manage your intimate relationship and leverage it as a robust support system for your healing process.
However, this will depend on your husband's cooperation.
Thirdly, it is recommended that you attempt to document the traumatic events in question.
It is recommended that you write them down, take a moment to step away from the situation, and then review them. You can remind yourself that at the time you were too weak to handle the situation effectively, and that was not a mistake. However, now that you are an adult, you have the ability to overcome the traumatic event.
We recommend the pocket exercises from One Psychology, which include a variety of exercises. These exercises are accompanied by guidance, theory, and interpretation.
Should you require further assistance, you may also engage the services of a coach or counselor.
I encourage you to give this approach a try. Accept the trauma, identify the root cause, and embrace the path to healing. When you understand yourself better, you can provide a different kind of nourishment for your children.
As a counselor, I experience periods of depression and periods of positivity. I extend my love and appreciation to the world.


Comments
I can totally relate to the pain and anxiety you're feeling. It's heartening that you've taken steps to heal and are so mindful of not passing on those old patterns. Every day is a learning process, and just by being aware and seeking better ways, you're already doing an incredible job as a mother. Consider setting boundaries with your motherinlaw regarding your parenting approach; communication might help her understand your perspective.
It's really commendable that you're working hard to break the cycle and be a nurturing parent despite your own experiences. Remember, it's okay to not be perfect. Your child will benefit from seeing you grow and adapt. Perhaps engaging in family therapy could provide support for you and also offer a platform to discuss and align on parenting strategies with your motherinlaw in a constructive way.
Parenting is such a challenging yet rewarding journey, and it sounds like you're deeply committed to giving your daughter the best start in life. The fact that you're reflecting on your actions and actively trying to create a healthy environment shows how much you care. Maybe finding a community or support group of parents who share similar values can offer you guidance and reassurance. Also, taking time for selfcare is essential; when you're well, you can be more present and patient with your family.