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Personality number 8, a girl, and personality number 4, a boy, are suitable for marriage?

Enneagram Type 8 Type 4 Compatibility Love Marriage
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Personality number 8, a girl, and personality number 4, a boy, are suitable for marriage? By Anonymous | Published on December 18, 2024

I took the Enneagram test. I am an 8, and my boyfriend is a 4.

The two of them have a lot of sparks together. But it's also easy to ignore his sensitivity.

What are the chances of 8 and 4 getting married?

What should I do as an 8 to make an 4 love me more?

Heath Heath A total of 2542 people have been helped

Good day. I believe you are a straightforward, determined, and benevolent individual. You hold a deep affection for your partner and aspire to wed him. You also hope that he reciprocates your feelings.

You are concerned that your boyfriend's sensitivities may be being overlooked, which could potentially lead to a reduction in his level of affection towards you.

You adhere to the Enneagram test and utilize it as a benchmark to assess the prospective trajectory of your relationship with your partner. Is this an accurate representation?

It is not possible to make all decisions based on a single set of standards.

It is not possible to measure anything by absolute standards, and this is particularly relevant in the context of your relationship with your boyfriend.

The Enneagram personality test is a valuable tool that enables individuals to gain insight into their own personalities and to develop a deeper understanding of the personalities of others.

While the Enneagram test can be used as a reference, it cannot be the sole standard for defining personalities or measuring relationship development.

Does focusing on and caring for the other person's feelings genuinely result in greater love from that person?

Personality type 8 is a leader who enjoys assuming control and is highly controlling. This personality type tends to be more dominant in social situations and prefers to take the lead. However, it should be noted that this trait is essential for effective leadership in a professional setting.

Individuals with personality type 4 are often sensitive, calculating, jealous, stubborn, and arrogant. They are inclined to romanticize situations and may be perceived as tragic romantics.

In your relationship with your boyfriend, you typically assume the role of the primary initiator, while he tends to be more passive.

You enjoy assuming the role of the primary initiator and decision-maker in the relationship. This may manifest as a tendency to proactively seek ways to deepen the other person's feelings of love and commitment.

You are concerned that your actions may be perceived as neglectful and that this may result in a loss of interest from your partner.

However, you will come to understand that your initiative and attention will not necessarily result in a greater level of affection from the other person. Instead, it may cause them to become increasingly distant.

Furthermore, this may lead to feelings of apprehension and caution.

If you wish to enhance your relationship with your boyfriend, it is essential to prioritize self-care.

Caring about each other and paying attention to each other's feelings is a common practice among young couples in romantic relationships.

It is also essential to maintain a healthy equilibrium.

From the perspective of the other person, excessive attention can be perceived as uncomfortable and restrictive, potentially leading to a desire for distance.

Furthermore, an excessive focus on the needs of others can result in a lack of attention to one's own feelings and a tendency to undervalue oneself.

It is unwise to attempt to ingratiate oneself with another person in exchange for their affection.

It is therefore more appropriate to focus on your own feelings and emotions before considering the needs of others.

It is my hope that you will accept the premise that the more you love yourself, the more the other person will love you.

Best regards,

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Maximo Castro Maximo Castro A total of 2162 people have been helped

Hello, questioner. I'm pleased to have this opportunity to meet here.

You trust the test results, so I'm sure you'll learn more about your personalities and your boyfriend's. That way, you'll get along better. You love your boyfriend and want to succeed with him. I also want to become a better person for him. You two get along well, so I'm happy you've found love.

The test results clearly show that your personality type 8 is more capable, rational, and action-oriented, while the male personality type 4 is more sensitive and perceptive because it is emotional and romantic.

I understand your concern that despite getting along well, there may be a gap in your character traits. I want to assure you that if time passes, there will be no problems between you. You will be able to successfully enter into marriage.

I know he loves me, and I know he'll keep loving me.

2. Personality differences complement each other.

From the characteristics of the Enneagram personality type, it is clear that you are a little careless. This sometimes results in neglecting small details and little romances that your boyfriend values highly, causing him to become more sensitive. If you have ever had a conflict, this is undoubtedly the cause.

However, your ability to act and make decisions will lead him in the general direction. His gentleness and delicacy will also fill the gaps in your life plan and add more color to your life.

I am certain that this is the reason why you have got along so well so far! You complement each other perfectly and form a true sense of "other half"!

3. The icing on the cake.

You want to be with him for the rest of your life, and a lifetime is a long time. There will be many days and nights when the two of you are face to face. You must adjust yourself at all times.

You're great at managing your relationship. You value your boyfriend and are always looking for ways to improve it.

You can solve most of the problems that are likely to arise between couples as long as you maintain good communication.

You need to be less self-centered when making decisions, consider the other person's feelings more, and tell them how you feel more often.

Lovers will eventually become family!

I am an enthusiastic respondent, a psychological listener, and an offline consultant at Yixinli. I am knowledgeable about how to face life and I summarize experience to help others. I am confident that I can help you.

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Justin Justin A total of 2804 people have been helped

Hi there, I'm sending you a big hug in all directions.

After reading the title, I did some research on the Enneagram. I learned that number 4 is the Romantic personality type, also known as the individualist or artist, and number 8 is the Leader personality type, also known as the controller and protector.

You also said in your question that you two have a lot in common, but it's also easy to ignore his sensitivities.

I think this probably also matches your leadership personality type of 8. You might be worried that if two people get together, can two seemingly incompatible personalities get along?

First of all, I want to say that whether two people can get along well depends more on how they interact and their state of mind. For example, being able to respect each other, empathize, understand, seek common ground while reserving differences, etc.

For instance, a couple both enjoy kayaking. When they go kayaking together, one wants to go left and the other wants to go right, and they end up arguing and breaking up.

Another couple, the husband likes kayaking but the wife doesn't. They talk about going kayaking, and the wife says she'd go with her husband. When they play, they work together and have a great time.

It's not so much about the personalities of the two people involved, but more about how they treat each other and how well they get along.

I know you like durian, which I don't care for, but I'm happy to respect your preferences and buy it for you. I'd never accuse you of eating this stuff!

In short, it means that we can be different, but we must respect each other's differences.

Going back to the question of your personalities, it seems from the Enneagram perspective that it's tough for you to get along.

But first, your personality shouldn't be seen as a label. There's a self-fulfilling prophecy in psychology. For example, if you think you're a leader, you'll act like one, and over time, you'll become one.

This is why so many people find fortune-telling so accurate. If they believe in it, they'll be drawn towards the end of the road.

Another thing you can do is learn some different ways to communicate with different people. For example, you could try "Nonviolent Communication" or "Intimacy (Roland Miller)." There's no such thing as a difficult person or difficult things to communicate with. It's just a matter of people not knowing how to communicate.

Of course, communication is a two-way street. We can try to make ourselves good communicators and influence and guide the other person towards healthy communication as much as possible, but whether the other person is willing to follow up is another matter. After all, we cannot force others to change.

Ultimately, whether you and Boy #4 can walk down the aisle depends on how well you get along and communicate with each other, and on the value you provide to each other.

The bottom line is that if you want to make someone fall in love with you, you've got to make them feel like you're valuable to them.

As a general rule, the value between people is based on sexual value, resource value, and emotional value.

The solution is to give them what they want.

If your partner is a romantic, you can't be too realistic. For example, if your partner says, "Let's buy a bouquet of flowers for 100 yuan," you can say, "Let's buy some radishes instead."

You see, this isn't the same channel. It's just boring to talk about the sky.

Of course, it's not a good idea to always agree with the other person. It's better to agree with them at first and then slowly guide them after they see your value and give you theirs. The goal isn't to change them into your "subordinate," but to find common ground while keeping your differences, so they're also willing to make concessions.

To sum up, this is also a technical job. As it's technical, there's a routine and a technical route. You can read more related materials, books, etc.

Let's get on with it.

I'm a psychological counselor who often feels depressed but also has moments of positivity. I love the world and everything in it!

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Jonah Jonah A total of 2793 people have been helped

Greetings, inquirer.

Upon careful examination of your inquiry, it became evident that during their formative years, many individuals employ various methods, including personality tests and other forms of divination such as astrology, the study of the twelve zodiac signs, and the interpretation of blood types, to ascertain the compatibility of prospective couples and the likelihood of fostering mutual love and affection.

It is my intention to share my personal understanding with you, and it is my hope that it will prove to be a modest source of inspiration.

1. Personality tests can facilitate greater mutual understanding.

At times, individuals may seek to gain insight into their own personalities by taking personality tests.

For example, if Number 8 is a leader, they pursue power, emphasize strength, do not rely on others, and have a sense of justice.

Individuals classified as Type 4 are characterized by a self-oriented, emotional, and romantic disposition, as well as a tendency to prioritize and value their own feelings and emotions.

An understanding of the personality types of the two individuals can facilitate a deeper level of familiarity and understanding between them. The recognition of the differences between their personalities can also enhance communication.

For example, while Number 8 is action-oriented and exhibits minimal concern for self-reflection and self-analysis, Number 4 demonstrates a high level of self-awareness, self-reflection, and self-exploration.

This will facilitate an awareness of the diverse response patterns and habits that each of you will bring to the relationship.

This is a highly positive development.

Concurrently, it is imperative to recognize that

Personality tests or other forms of assessment are merely a reference point. Given the vast number of individuals in the world, categorising them into nine distinct types is an overly broad classification.

It is challenging to categorize an individual into a specific type.

Individuals belonging to the same type may exhibit numerous similarities, yet they also possess distinctive characteristics.

In light of this understanding, personality tests can be utilized as a means of fostering enhanced interpersonal relationships, without being constrained by the limitations of the test itself.

Both you and your partner possess distinctive characteristics. It is therefore important to recognise that a fulfilling relationship requires effort and mutual respect. By doing so, it is possible to identify the key to your own happiness.

2. A beneficial relationship provides nourishment to both parties and fulfills their fundamental needs.

For those interested, a book entitled "How to Make the One You Love Love You" is available for perusal.

It is evident that love necessitates a certain degree of proficiency.

For example, the two individuals can cultivate a profound sense of intimacy and accentuate their shared characteristics.

A more balanced relationship in terms of effort and reward will result in greater happiness.

This concept is analogous to the adage "You're great, and I'm not bad," which is typified by a more enduring and profound form of affection.

If one partner is the primary contributor to the relationship for an extended period while the other receives more than they offer, the relationship will eventually become imbalanced and may not withstand the test of time.

I concur with the assertion put forth by Cong Feicong that it is imperative to meet the core needs of one's partner.

To illustrate, if one desires a greater degree of affection from one's romantic partner, it is essential to ascertain the underlying values that are most important to that individual.

The ability to satisfy one's partner is of paramount importance.

This phenomenon can be observed in some women, who, despite their physical attractiveness, tend to exhibit a heightened sense of insecurity and a strong preference for security.

Therefore, a man who is able to provide a sense of security for a woman, regardless of his physical appearance or financial status, may also be inclined to marry her and demonstrate affectionate behavior.

It would be beneficial to ascertain what your boyfriend values. Has he ever expressed this to you?

It can be reasonably assumed that everyone longs to be respected and understood. However, it is unclear whether the individual in question truly cares about these things.

In addition to sensitivity, what other emotional needs must be met for him to feel cared for?

When two individuals complement each other, it can facilitate mutual satisfaction.

With regard to the objective of fostering a greater degree of love and affection from one's partner, it can be posited that the conviction that one is deserving of love and that one possesses intrinsic value is conducive to the attainment of this goal.

One must always maintain confidence in one's own uniqueness and value. It is therefore implausible that a woman of such qualities could fail to be perceived as attractive.

Please disseminate these ideas.

Please disseminate these concepts.

One must have confidence in oneself in order to find one's own love and happiness.

This necessitates individual exploration.

I wish you the best of luck!

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Comments

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Helen Jackson The more you engage in diligence, the more you discover.

It sounds like a unique dynamic between an Eight and a Four. The Enneagram suggests that Eights are powerful, dominant types while Fours are more introspective and sensitive. Sparks can fly between you two because of the contrast but it's important to be mindful of his feelings. Marriage chances depend on how well you both can adapt and grow together. As an Eight, learning to soften your approach and showing vulnerability can help him feel more secure in expressing love.

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Alden Davis Knowledge is power, and the more knowledge one has, the more powerful one becomes.

Understanding each other's core motivations is key. An Eight like yourself thrives on strength and impact, whereas a Four seeks authenticity and depth in relationships. To deepen his love for you, try being attentive to his emotional needs and offer support without overshadowing his individuality. This balance can foster a profound connection.

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Brisbane Davis Time is a marathon, not a sprint.

Every relationship has its challenges, especially with such different personalities. But this difference can also be a great asset. Focus on building a foundation of trust and respect. Be patient and give him space when he needs it, which shows understanding and can strengthen the bond between you two.

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Hali Miller Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.

The Enneagram reveals much about our inner worlds. As an Eight, you might come across as strong and protective, but don't forget that love thrives on mutual understanding. Try to create moments where you both can share deeper emotions. This will make him feel valued and appreciated, encouraging a deeper affection for you.

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Conan Thomas Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

It's not just about what you do, but how you perceive things. Being an Eight, you're likely used to taking charge, but consider stepping back sometimes and letting him lead. Recognizing his artistic and sensitive nature and giving him opportunities to shine can increase his admiration and love for you.

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