Repeated separations and reunions; what to do when the boyfriend focuses on beautiful women after a separation?

It seems like your boyfriend's behavior is more of a pattern of "mutual depletion" than "mutual achievement." It seems like he doesn't trust you and always questions you in strange ways, making you feel like you're not being trusted.

After a long day, your mood might not be the best. When he keeps asking questions, it's easy to get frustrated and say you want to break up or block him. But you know you're both single now, so you could find someone else. Is that what you want?

♠After breaking up and getting back together a few times, my boyfriend started paying attention to other women.

♠You interviewed him, and he kept calling to ask where you were.

♠Sending messages and then constantly texting back and forth, feeling unreasonable

It might be worth considering splitting up and getting back together.

Sad

Could it be that the other person is trying to make you angry by connecting quickly and seamlessly, and you quickly say goodbye because you want to make him realize his own problems and stimulate him to change his mind?

It can be really draining when relationships come and go.

And whether you two really want to break up.

Even if you decide to end things, can you draw a clean line?

If it's really over, it's probably best not to check each other's social media, because the other person is now free to move on. Whether or not the other person follows some blogger is still up to them, and we as outsiders can only watch with a bit of a sad face.

While it might not meet moral standards, moral standards are for those who can "consciously demand moral conduct." You feel that you have no basis of trust. Did this situation exist from the beginning? He doesn't trust you, you don't trust him, so should the relationship continue?

You've had a lot of arguments and broken up and gotten back together, and there's a pattern to it. Maybe he's paying attention to sexy bloggers to stop you from saying "break up" too easily, while you've said over and over that you want him to take responsibility and make changes.

You're sad, but the other person might not be able to understand that. It seems like there's already a wall between you, making it hard to understand each other and communicate well. So, you need to make a decision when you're calm.

If you feel wronged or controlled, you can take some time to calm down and seek psychological counseling. This might help you figure out if there's still a need for this relationship or if it needs to be adjusted. Love is about mutual achievement and making each other better, not making each other feel worse. I wish you well.

ZQ?

Good day, host.

I extend my support and understanding to you in light of the challenging emotions that often arise in intimate relationships.

It is evident that you are unable to regulate your emotions. Despite the termination of contact due to certain disagreements,

However, it would appear that the relationship has not been completely terminated. Given that the two parties have already formally ended their relationship, it is accurate to describe the other person as your former partner.

It would be advisable to avoid dwelling on his behaviour, as this may indicate that the hostess has not yet fully moved on from the situation.

With regard to the matter of the boyfriend following a beautiful anchorwoman on Weibo, it may be the case that he is feeling lonely and is seeking visual stimulation.

If this occurs during the relationship, the hostess indicates that she is not satisfied with this type of behavior from her partner. If you repeatedly express your displeasure and he continues to ignore it,

This indicates that the boyfriend is indifferent to the hostess's feelings.

Such a relationship is highly detrimental to one's emotional well-being.

To eliminate the pain entirely, it is necessary to sever all contact.

It is imperative that you sever your obsession with this individual from the depths of your being and refrain from harboring any hope.

I believed that if I made a statement, I could facilitate a change. However, I have come to understand that people are not easily amenable to change.

Unless you are prepared to make the necessary changes, no one else can say that you cannot.

If you still believe it is impossible to move on from this person, consider ending the relationship and rekindling it a few times.

The underlying cause of the sadness is the continued presence of illusions about this person.

A positive relationship is not one that is devoid of conflict.

Instead, they engage in frequent disagreements and are unable to maintain a separation.

If you wish to completely disengage, you must sever all communication channels with the individual in question.

It is important to focus on your strengths and interests, pursue personal growth, engage in regular exercise, read books, and invest in your health and confidence.

As you improve, you will also attract a more suitable partner.

I would like to take this opportunity to wish the host a speedy recovery from their ailment.

I am writing to express my warm regards to you, June, and to all of our esteemed colleagues around the globe.

Hello! I'll give you a warm hug from afar first!

You can feel the injustice and anger inside you when your boyfriend doesn't understand, support, or respect you — and you can choose to do something about it!

It's great that you're actively seeking help! It shows you still have the desire to continue your relationship with your boyfriend. His message to you after the meeting made you feel misunderstood, untrusted, disrespected, and unsupported. That's totally normal! And every time you had a conflict and separated, he would go browse some sexy pornographic websites, which made you feel especially hurt and uncomfortable. That's not okay! You deserve better.

You've clearly felt the harm his behavior has caused you. But have you tried to choose to bravely and sincerely tell him your true feelings and how you want to be treated at that moment of hurt? That's the first step to him realizing that his actions have deeply hurt you and that you cannot be treated this way. If he really cares about you and wants to get along with you, he needs to try to change his behavior and attitude towards you. What do you think?

If you express your true feelings sincerely and courageously, you are not only setting self-protective boundaries in the relationship, but also guiding your boyfriend as to how you want to be treated. And when you do this, something amazing happens! You will be treated in the way you expect, and when your expectations are responded to appropriately and accurately, your boyfriend's sense of value, which is intrinsically needed and appreciated, will also be well satisfied. This will inspire him to try even harder to respond to you in the way you expect. It's a win-win!

It's time to get real with yourself! Take a good, honest look at what you're afraid of and what you're worried about behind your inability to bravely express your true feelings and directly speak your needs. For example, what does it mean to you to be afraid of being rejected, denied, or disliked? Does it mean that you're bad and terrible because you cannot accept such a self within you? And when you are not very aware of this part of yourself, you will unintentionally project your inner self's rejection onto others, thinking that others will not accept such a self either.

Out of a sense of self-preservation, you choose to suppress and hide your true emotions. But there's another way!

The great news is that you can take control of how others treat you in a relationship by taking control of how you treat yourself. And the first step to being able to express your true feelings sincerely and courageously in a relationship, and to speak directly about your needs, is to first learn to accept yourself, to accept yourself inside and out, to appreciate yourself, to be able to see both your shortcomings and your strengths.

Absolutely! You should definitely allow yourself to have needs, and your needs need to be responded to appropriately and accurately.

Guess what! The reason why a boyfriend repeatedly pays attention to sexy beauty bloggers may be that in the process, some of his inner needs that are lacking are well met. This part may not be well met and responded to by you, so he seeks it externally. And your sincere and open attitude towards him will, to a large extent, guide and imply that he also opens up to you. How exciting is that?

I'd love to know your thoughts on this!

Behind every inappropriate behavior is a longing for love!

The world and I love you so much!

Don't worry, I'm here to help! Let me try to answer your questions from a man's perspective.

First, constantly asking where you are is a sign that he might need to work on his trust issues. It's totally normal to feel insecure sometimes, but it's also important to have self-confidence. It's a bit clingy, but it could also be a sign of obsession or fanaticism.

You mentioned many times that it was because of him, or did you also behave in a similar way towards him? I'm just trying to understand!

Secondly, you follow your ex-boyfriend on WeChat. Do you think many young people these days have WeChat accounts?

I'm just wondering if it's a habit. Could it be that you're just a plaything for him, or is it just a way for him to monitor your boyfriend's social media activities in his spare time?

I just want to say that I don't think this is the best approach. It's basically the same as your boyfriend's extreme attention and questioning.

It's so important to remember that you both do the same thing, so there's no reason to dislike each other.

Third, breaking up and getting back together many times shows that you haven't completely severed ties with him yet. But you two can absolutely make it work! You just need to resolve the above conflicts.

Fourth, I really don't think your boyfriend is following sexy bloggers because he's separated from you.

With the advent of online social media, following sexy bloggers is akin to previously encountering beautiful women on the street. It's the same principle as when you can't help but take a glance even though you're right next to them. It doesn't necessarily indicate that he has other intentions. Of course, if there is private contact or other actions, it's a different matter.

I really hope I can help you, so please keep up the great work!

Hi there! I'm Qingnian JIA2020, and I'm really looking forward to chatting with you more.

Yi Xinli I'm here to answer all your questions! I'm part of the Answering Questions Hall Mutual Aid Community, and I'm connected to the World and I Love You. You can find me at https://m.xinli001.com/qa