The senior son is depressed, and he resists seeing a psychologist. Don't know what to do.

Hello, I can totally see how anxious and worried you must be as a parent.

"My son is a senior this year. I've realized that I've been beating and scolding him since he was young, which has caused him a lot of harm." It's so important to recognize your own emotional problems. I know it must be hard on you when you realize that your emotional instability may be the cause of your child's depression.

"My child is now very self-deprecating, refusing to communicate with us, and spending all day locked in his room...not brushing his teeth or washing his face, and only wearing the same clothes. "I can feel that my son lacks vitality, and the family is full of anxiety, but he is unwilling to go to the doctor. As parents, we are anxious to see what we should do?

First of all, it's really important to show your son lots of understanding and support.

It's so important to try to understand your son's position and concerns. We all have different experiences and ways of thinking, and your son might have some concerns or misconceptions about seeing a psychologist, just like most people do.

Have a nice, honest chat with your son. Let him know you're there for him, and listen to what he has to say.

- Look for other options, okay?

If your son still isn't ready to see a psychologist, don't worry! There are other options you can try, like contacting the school's psychological counselor. As a student, you might be able to get support from the school, too.

Another great idea is to take your son on a trip to show him a new environment and help him relax during the trip. This could really help to make him more approachable and receptive.

Give him some space and time to figure things out. It's important to respect your son's decisions, but also let him know that you're always there for him.

Let him have some time and space to work through his emotions, while you stay in touch and keep the lines of communication open.

Above all, keep on showing your love and support.

Let your son know that he's not facing this alone. Let him see how you're there for him, and how you care about him. That way, he'll have the courage to come out.

This is the perfect blend of knowledge and action. I truly hope that we get to enjoy many more happy moments together in the future!

Hello! I'm listening with great interest.

I can feel that you are constantly caught up in self-blame because you feel emotionally unstable, scold your child, and cause your child to feel inferior. You feel powerless when your son doesn't want to communicate. You feel distressed when you see your son shut himself in his room all day, never going out, and going to bed late. But, you can do it! You can take back control. You can be the parent you want to be. You can be the parent you need to be. You can be the parent you deserve to be.

Seeing him unable to take care of himself gives you a chance to think about how you can help him in the future. All kinds of thoughts and emotions well up in your mind, and you feel a mixture of emotions. You really have had a hard time, but you're going to get through it!

This is your path to growth!

1. It's not your fault!

But you were also not properly seen and treated as a child. You are emotionally unstable because you were also not properly cared for and loved.

It's not your fault! When you were a child, your primary caregiver was unable to provide emotional stability, and you never had the chance to learn how to do it yourself. But now you've started on the journey, and by seeing your own pain, you can see the pain in others.

This is the perfect place to start!

2. Discovery is the beginning of growth!

You've taken the first step by recognizing your emotional instability. This is a great start! You can make changes to your communication pattern.

Be gentle, non-judgmental, and look at your child with a complimentary eye to find his or her bright spots and give affirmation and praise. Instead of jumping to conclusions, deny your child's perceptions and behaviors.

For example:

You stay in your room all day, never going out—and you love it!

Sleeping in late at night and sleeping in until noon!

Not brushing your teeth or washing your face!

And only wearing the same clothes!

Now, what do you see in these questions?

What can you think of? And what about the consequences?

Is your conclusion an over-exaggeration of the idea of disaster? Absolutely not!

In fact, if you look into it, you'll find that many children are like this, and it's not just your child!

Absolutely! There is so much about your child that is worth seeing and praising!

3. Have a chat with your child about the results of his choices.

Children may not have the same wealth of knowledge and experience as you do, but you have your own unique set of skills and abilities! You can talk to your child about the life he wants to lead in the future and what kind of efforts he needs to make if he wants to live that kind of life. There are also feasible plans!

Let him learn the consequences of his actions and be able to bear the consequences. This is an amazing opportunity for him to learn and grow!

4. The child is not sick, just different from you in behavior and thinking — and that's a good thing!

Please don't look at him as a patient. He's just a little different from us, and that's a good thing! Accepting his current unhappiness is the only way to truly see his change.

You've got this! I'm here for you!

Good question!

You feel self-blame, anxiety, and worry. You are worried that your child is avoiding social interaction and hiding in his own world, and that he may be depressed. You realize that scolding and beating him when he was young caused him a lot of harm, and you know you are largely responsible for not raising him well. You feel so much self-blame, and you know you need to find a way to stimulate his vitality.

Let's explore this together.

What's wrong with my son?

My son is in his senior year of college and is experiencing the stress of graduation and job hunting. Given the poor employment environment, he will be particularly confused, which is normal. Everyone has gone through this stage. However, everyone's coping methods are different. My son's current procrastination is his coping method. He has no energy to take action and needs to procrastinate like this.

You need to stop trying to help him. The more you do, the more pressure you put on him. He may even feel useless, superfluous, unfilial, and increasingly decadent.

Therefore, at this stage, you must do nothing. Give him the greatest possible freedom. Understand that his current state is what he needs. Give him time. Wait for him to take the initiative to ask you for help.

[Your anxiety]

As a parent, it's natural to worry about your children. However, we must take responsibility for our own anxieties. My son is in his fourth year of university and is ready to face society independently. It's time for us to let go and stop focusing on him.

We must learn to relax and not be affected by our son. We cannot expect our son to make changes to alleviate our anxiety.

[Separate the issues]

We must learn to detach from our son's problems, even though they cause us distress. All the love in the world is for coming together, but the love of parents is for parting.

Parents must be close to their children and nurture their growth. They must also separate from their children and promote their independence.

Your son needs to face and resolve his own problems.

Assess the impact your son's problems have had on you. If they affect your normal life, seek help from a professional psychological counselor or consultant.

I am confident that this will be helpful to you.

I am your son, who has grown up with you. Thank you for your attention.

Hello!

From what you've told me about your son, I can see that you're really worried and anxious. It's so sad to hear how worried you are about your son's state.

You're worried that your son might be depressed, but he's not ready to go out for treatment. You're concerned that things might get worse and that your son's safety and health could be at risk. You're sad and feel like you've made mistakes, especially since you've been emotionally unstable and have scolded and beaten your son since he was young. You wonder if that might have caused him harm and led to his current feelings of inferiority and self-isolation.

It's natural to feel responsible for your son's current situation. It's important to remember, though, that there are many causes of depression, and being scolded and beaten since childhood isn't one of them. If you look it up online, you'll find lots of information about the causes of depression.

Your son is a senior this year, which is a big transition for anyone! You say he is now very self-deprecating, which is totally normal for a teenager. He has refused to communicate with his parents, which is a bummer, but it's also a sign that he's going through a lot. He locks himself in his room all day, doesn't go out, sleeps late at night, sleeps until noon, doesn't brush his teeth or wash his face, and only wears one set of clothes.

It's totally understandable that you're feeling overwhelmed by your son's behavior at home. It's natural to worry when our kids seem to be struggling, especially when it seems like their lack of hygiene and unwillingness to go out could be signs of low self-esteem and depression. It's so important to remember that we can't make assumptions about our kids' mental health, and it's not your fault if you're feeling worried.

I can see why you're worried. It's hard when our kids shut themselves in their rooms and don't communicate with us.

First of all, is he currently feeling depressed? It's totally understandable that you don't have a diagnosis from a psychiatrist. It seems like he's just feeling reluctant to communicate with you and to leave his room.

His schedule is similar to that of other college students, who often have a lot on their plates! Many college students always sleep in and get up late. Many college students like to spend time in their rooms, and they communicate with each other in their own unique ways online.

They don't really hang out together that much. These students in their twenties are adults, and they want to be treated like adults and have their own space.

They want their parents to treat them like adults and don't want to be tied down by their parents. But they're not financially independent yet, so they can't be completely self-reliant.

It's so important to feel like you're in your own space, like you get to choose your own clothes and arrange your own schedule.

It would be really helpful for us to have a clear understanding of the situation with your son. I know it can be really hard to calm down when we're feeling emotional, especially when we're used to reacting in certain ways. When your son was younger, you hit and scolded him because of your unstable emotions.

I can see how you might think that your son's inferiority complex is caused by this. It's only natural to want to control your son's behavior and correct what you think are his problems. But, if you continue to feel this way, it might make things worse for him.

So, the question is, how can you find a way to calm your emotions? This is something you can work on together.

However, psychology is all about who is suffering and who needs treatment. So, who is most affected by the son's symptoms?

Who noticed it first? Who is most concerned?

Who is suffering the most? If it's you, you might really benefit from some psychological counseling. If your son is comfortable with these behaviors, it could be a sign that he's comfortable with himself.

I can see how you might think your son is more self-deprecating and depressed than he really is. He seems quite self-assured, so it's understandable that he'd refuse to go to a psychologist. It might be helpful to consider that there might be something else going on with him, and that the relationship could be a factor.

It would be really great if you could try to change the atmosphere in your family relationship. It would also be a big help to your son if you could find ways to establish a good connection with him.

Even if your son has some problems, he might not be ready to go to a psychologist with you right now. So, why not take the first step and try to connect with him?

Once you've done that, you can start to think about the second step, which is to establish an appropriate communication channel with your adult son. The third step is to focus on building a good mother-son relationship with your son.

Then, you might want to think about whether it would be helpful to see a psychologist. You could go together as a family or you could go individually. You could choose the time and you could choose the counselor.

It would be really helpful for you and your son if you could try to understand each other from your son's perspective. Have a nice, calm chat with him, rather than getting impatient and demanding that he do something.

First, it's really important to try to be in a calm frame of mind, to be open to any outcome, to ask your son questions, to listen to him carefully, to try to understand his thoughts, and to be as tolerant and understanding as possible.

It's time to make some changes in the mother-son relationship! It's important to establish boundaries that are suitable for you both, and to learn to communicate and interact with each other like two adults.

Your son is an adult who needs his own space, time to think, and a certain amount of independence. It's great that he's taking a college course in mental health! You should believe that he knows more about this part of psychology than you do.

You can trust that he knows himself better, has his own thoughts, and has his own needs.

If your anxiety is keeping you up at night and affecting your diet, please don't go through this alone. If you need help, don't hesitate to reach out to a coach who can support you in exploring your needs and seeing yourself in a new light.

It's so important to let a professional be there with you through this difficult time.

The world and I love you, and we want you to love yourself too!

I totally get where you're coming from and I'm here to help. I've been in your shoes and I know how tough it is. I've got some advice that I think will really help you and your son get through this tricky time.

First, it's important to recognize that your actions have caused your son a lot of pain. His current reactions are the result of a long, cumulative effect. That's why we need to take targeted measures to help him heal and gradually change his lifestyle and mindset.

Second, we need to build a strong, trusting relationship with our son. Even if he's not ready to communicate with us right now, it's so important for us to try to understand his innermost thoughts and feelings.

You can show your love and care for your son in so many ways! One of the best ways is by writing him letters or leaving him messages. Let him know that you're there for him and that you want to help him get through this tough time. You can also start with things he loves, like his favorite music, movies, sports, etc. Connect with him through his interests and build a stronger bond.

Third, we really need to actively seek professional help. I know your son is currently resisting seeing a psychologist, but I just want to reassure you that professional treatment is definitely still an option.

It's so important to remember that you're not alone in this. You can talk to a professional psychologist or counselor to get advice and treatment options for your son. If possible, you can also go to the doctor with your son to show him that you support and accompany him.

Fourth, we need to help our son establish healthy living habits. This includes good eating habits, regular rest and sleep, personal hygiene, etc.

You can work out a healthy lifestyle plan with him and encourage him to develop regular habits. It would also be great for him to participate in some positive and beneficial activities, such as outdoor sports, travel, volunteer work, etc. This will really help to enhance his self-confidence and social skills!

When you're facing this dilemma, I've got some suggestions and strategies that I think will really help you and your son.

1. Show him you care: It's important to let him know you're there for him and that you understand what he's going through. Listen to him and reassure him that he can share his feelings with you.

2. Build an emotional support network: It's so important to find other family members, friends, or professionals, such as teachers and counselors, to help you and your son cope together. They can provide additional support, understanding, and advice, which will really help!

3. Let your son express himself in a positive way: encourage him to express his feelings and emotions through writing, drawing, music, or other forms of art. This can help him release emotions and reduce inner stress.

4. Help your son learn some healthy coping methods! These could be things like deep breathing, meditation, exercise, or taking classes in relaxation techniques. These methods can help him manage his emotions and reduce anxiety and stress.

5. Find and join a support group: It's so important to find people or families who have similar experiences to your son and join a relevant support group or community. This way, he can feel that he is not alone and can gain inspiration and support from the experiences of others.

6. Nurture a happy family: It's so important to create a positive, supportive, and warm family environment. Show your love and affection, encourage the development of close relationships, and spend more time doing fun family activities together, like cooking, watching movies, or going outdoors.

7. Keep an eye on your son's progress: This is a long-term process that requires patience and constant attention. It's so important to communicate with your son regularly to understand his situation and needs, and adjust and improve your support strategies according to his changes.

Above all, give your son lots of love and support. With patience, understanding, and positive actions, help him regain confidence, build a positive self-image, and create a bright future for himself.

If you're still having trouble, it's a good idea to chat with a professional psychologist or counselor. They can offer more specific advice and support.

And finally, we just need to give our son lots of love and patience. Throughout this process, we need to try to stay calm, rational, and caring, and give him lots of positive feedback and encouragement.

We know it might take a little while to get through this, but we're going to stick with it together. We're confident that we can help our son get through this tricky patch and build up his confidence and self-esteem again.

Hello, I'm Liu, your listener.

It's clear from your words that you're feeling the exhaustion that comes with parenting. It's heartbreaking to see your child suffering and withdrawing from the world. I can see a parent who is full of guilt and helplessness in your words. In any case, you haven't given up on your child. At the very least, you're trying your best and haven't given up hope. This is worthy of respect and recognition.

At least you've finally had a breakthrough.

Then it might not be too late.

1. There are many factors that contribute to how a person becomes who they are. A traumatic experience in the original family may be the initial source. The child chooses to shut themselves in, trying to isolate themselves from the repeated torment of the memories.

I hope you can really get him in this part.

He's just as challenging as you are.

It's easy to put yourself in someone else's shoes, but it's not so simple in practice.

In particular, when we may also be the instigator, the feelings we have towards our children can be especially complicated. One day, we discover that our children refuse to be sensible and well-behaved, refuse to be filial and affectionate. When we think we have finally overcome the most trying period of being a parent, and all the storms have passed,

We want to start over, but he's not on board.

Later on, he started thinking about how he'd hurt his child. He wanted to be there for the young, wounded soul with a kind heart, a positive outlook, and open communication, but his child just shut the door in his face. It's even worse that he seems to have chosen to "exile" himself at a very critical time in his life. You're worried about his physical and mental health, and you're worried that he'll give up on himself.

You want him to have a healthy biological clock and lead a self-disciplined and positive life.

All of his outward signs

It makes you want to make a change and get something in return.

The storm did eventually pass.

But the destroyed trust, the frightening memories of being scolded, the tears in the dark after being rejected countless times, the loss of longing to be loved, affirmed and cared for but not being able to get what he wants, are all wrapped up in the heart of a child with low self-esteem. His fear won't go away just because time passes. Even if he's no longer the weak person he once was.

There are different kinds of fatigue, and mental fatigue can leave a person with too little energy to act.

In this house, he's constantly reminded of painful memories. For him, it's like being left in the lurch after a storm.

It's like a constant rainy season.

As adults, we tend to view childhood trauma with a kind of natural skepticism. We stand above it all, looking down from our own growth experiences, and sometimes we can't help but think, "We've been through so much worse, and we didn't... Is the child just too weak-willed? Many people who have experienced trauma, including ourselves, have carried it and survived it, so why can't they?"

I just want what's best for him, and I only want what's best for him, so why won't he cooperate?

I'm not trying to be critical. Nobody's born a parent. We choose to take on the weight of creating life, and we're not perfect in the process. But if we really want to help children with family and parent-child relationship issues,

The idea is that

We really need to get to know him better.

We need to understand what he's going through right now, what's happened in the past, how he's feeling about the future.

2. Based on what you said, it seems like there's still some missing pieces to the puzzle of your child's current situation.

It's true that family relationships are a big part of this. We can't ignore them when we're trying to figure out what's going on. Looking at your child's behavior and state of mind, it seems like he's dealing with not just things from the distant past, but also some more recent issues.

(1) He's not just a teenager, he's a senior facing all kinds of unknowns. It looks like he's home for the winter break.

Or did he leave early because he didn't have any classes in his senior year? Graduation is a big deal.

(2) Currently, he has limited social interaction within the home environment, with few options available. Could some difficulties in his interpersonal relationships at school have contributed to his low mood?

(3) We see a closed door, a late bedtime and rise-time, and no washing or changing of clothes. So, how does he spend his time?

Are there any games or plays he likes?

Or maybe he likes reading? While excessive indulgence is a cause for concern, what's even more worrying is that he's lost interest and enthusiasm.

(4) What's the family atmosphere like? Even if the child seems isolated from you, he'll pick up on the atmosphere around him. Has anything happened in the family recently?

We also need to pay attention to the details and observe how our children are feeling. We want our children to feel comfortable enough to speak up, but we also need to be aware of what's going on around us.

It's important to understand him.

III. Based on your situation, I'd like to suggest the following, which are just my personal opinions for your reference.

(1) Before we look at the issues your child is facing, we need to take a step back and look at our own state of mind. If we're always feeling anxious, we're likely to fall into a cycle.

It's important to remember that parents' emotions can affect their children.

It's also important to consider the parents' state of mind.

Dear questioner,

We may have to get to a point where we can forgive ourselves before we can become the kind of parents our kids need us to be. I hope you can be patient with yourself in this process.

I can tell you're feeling impatient. This pressure you're putting on yourself is getting in the way of building a good relationship with your family.

If we want to help our kids,

We need to focus on taking care of ourselves first.

I know you feel guilty towards your child. When the past can't be changed, we end up punishing ourselves, and both the child and you suffer. If you can, talk to someone you trust. As parents, we need guidance, and we need to understand our own issues. You can start by talking to a professional psychologist to work through your emotions.

(2) The more this happens, the less you should panic. Give him some time, respect his space, and let him know you love him.

Once trust is established, there's a good chance he'll reach out to you. But because he's been hurt too, he's still a bit afraid. He might even turn away from your outstretched hand.

This will take some patience.

What he needs to know now is that you're offering him security and that you won't "abandon" him or deny his humanity. We don't really know what happened to him, but we can at least tell him that you'll always be here for him, no matter what.

Love is often shown through actions and words.

You could write him a quick note. Don't jump to conclusions. Give him a little support. Ask if he needs to go for a walk, if he's been under too much pressure recently, and if he'd like to talk about what's been going on.

Ask him what he likes and what you can do to help. Then tell him you want him to be happy.

We may have to deal with rejection again and again.

Don't give up, though.

Ice needs heat to melt.

(3) Given the situation with the child, it seems that psychological intervention is needed, and his initial resistance is understandable.

The way you communicate is important. To make him feel accepted, we need to let the child know that we allow him to have his own safe space. When trying to discuss this possibility with the child, we need to let the child understand that if he has something on his mind that he is not willing to tell his parents, he can talk to a counselor who can be neutral. It's important to understand that his initial psychological defense is normal.

Let him know you won't be interfering with his counseling and that you respect his independence. Hopefully, he'll have a safe space to talk about his thoughts.

If he's still not keen on going out, online counseling could be a good option.

If the child shows symptoms of somatization, etc., we need to consider the possibility that there may be a more serious psychological disorder, in which case intervention is necessary to ensure the child's safety. We can consider taking the child for a complete physical and mental assessment first, and then make adjustments according to the results of the assessment and follow the doctor's advice.

Nothing is more important than his health.

That's all I have to say for now.

Thanks for reading.

I'm a mental health coach.

Psychotherapist, Lihong Liu

Please feel free to talk to me, ask questions, and exchange ideas.

Hi there!

I'm happy to answer your questions. I understand the issue you're facing.

First of all, you said in your description that your child resists going to the psychiatrist. This is understandable because "doctor" is forever associated with illness. Your child is suffering from low self-esteem, not an illness, and psychiatrists often deal with mental illnesses. At this time, you can use the simplest role reversal to think about it. If someone suddenly dragged you to the hospital to see a psychiatrist, what would your first reaction be?

It's likely to be rejected, and your child is the same. To some extent, if your child really has low self-esteem, what he needs is not a psychiatrist because he is not sick; what he needs is a counselor.

Here's a quick explanation. Psychologists and psychiatrists both study the mind, but one focuses on communication and the other on medication. I think that if everyone you know took you to the hospital to see a psychiatrist, you'd also feel uncomfortable.

Second, you wrote in your description that your son is a senior this year. You said that because of your emotional instability, you have been beating and scolding him since he was young, which has caused him a lot of harm. You also said that the child is now very inferior. It seems like you believe that the child's current behavior pattern is due to the harm caused when he was young. At this time, what really needs to be adjusted is the child's psychology, but this is not the main problem. The main problem is you. The one who needs to make adjustments is you. To put it bluntly, don't try to change your child's behavior and thoughts. Instead, change your own behavior and thoughts.

It might be worth noting that even though you've now identified the root of the problem, it's still going to be difficult to change your habits or control your emotions.

It can be tough to ask your child to change when you're feeling the effects of your own emotional instability. Your child's behavior may be a reflection of your emotional state, and it can be challenging to break this cycle. Even if your child does change, it might not be because of your emotions, and the situation might revert to the way it was before. Here's a simple analogy: cooking. If you personally dislike eating chili peppers, but your parents are used to adding them to rice, and you start a hunger strike because you hate chili peppers, whose problem is it?

So whose problem is it, and should the blame be placed on you for not getting used to chili for so long? And parents' habits may have been habits for twenty or thirty years, and it is difficult to ask them to change.

So who's really to blame?

You also mentioned that your daughter is "refuses to communicate with us, locks herself in her room all day, doesn't go out, goes to bed late at night and sleeps until noon, doesn't brush her teeth or wash her face, and only wears the same clothes." This is a clear sign that she's neglecting herself. The important thing to understand is that she doesn't want to communicate with you. There are a few reasons why:

First, they tend to lecture on things that aren't really moral or principle-related.

Second, they don't take their kids' opinions into account.

Third, they take things too seriously.

Fourth, they refuse to admit fault in front of their kids.

Fifth, they just aren't interested in talking to their kids at all.

Sixth, parents are unreasonable about many things.

7. There are all kinds of moral kidnappings.

Finally, they always get their way.

Here are a few suggestions:

1. Try to strengthen the relationship or build trust between you and your child. I believe that every parent has good intentions for their child, but sometimes, because of these good intentions, it's easy to lose the child's trust.

2. Parents need to learn to listen and think because their external role makes it easy for them to see their children from the perspective of previous generations. But times are changing fast, and kids are getting smarter. It's often the parents who can't keep up.

3. The child is already in their fourth year of university. If the family's financial situation allows, it's still a good idea to take the child out and about to see the world. Give them the chance to broaden their horizons, rather than confining them to the size of their room.

4. Look into professional psychological counselors who can help you communicate with and untie your child's knots. Before doing this, remember that the child must be willing.

The above content is for reference only.

Hello!

I totally get it. I can see how worried and confused you are. I've got a few ideas about how we can help your son.

It's so important to try to understand your son's situation. This includes trying to understand his emotions, behavior, and habits. When you understand his situation better, you can provide better support for him.

It might also be a good idea to chat with his classmates, friends, or teachers.

It's so important to respect your son's wishes. If he doesn't want help or refuses to communicate, it's okay! Don't force him to do anything he doesn't want to do, as this may make him feel even more isolated and resentful.

Give your son plenty of time and space to gradually get out of the situation on his own.

It's also a great idea to try to change the family environment. The family atmosphere can have a big impact on your son's mood and behavior. You can try to improve things by reducing conflicts and arguments and increasing parent-child interaction. This can really help your son feel safer and more stable.

Be there for your son. Give him all the support you can. You can do this by offering words of encouragement and support, or by helping him with practical tasks.

For example, you can prepare a delicious meal for him or help him tidy up his room. These small things can really make a big difference!

In short, we just need to be patient and pay attention to our son's situation. We should support and help him as much as we can, while respecting his wishes.

I really hope these suggestions will be helpful for you. I wish your son a speedy recovery and that he will soon be back to his old self, full of confidence and joy.

Dear Question Asker,

Your son is in his final year of college, exhibits a lack of punctuality, is unkempt, and is reluctant to communicate. This situation is causing you significant distress and anxiety. You are uncertain about how to respond and feel a sense of helplessness.

My son is currently in his senior year of high school. I am uncertain as to whether this state of mind will have an impact on his academic performance. It is currently winter vacation, but I am curious as to whether this is the prevailing state at home.

The observation of one's child in this condition can elicit feelings of anxiety. It is plausible that the child is experiencing a depth of emotion that surpasses that of the parent.

The future is inherently uncertain during one's tenure at the university level. It is not uncommon for individuals to feel adrift in this environment. While the manner in which one treats their child during their formative years may potentially exert an influence on their current circumstances, it is not necessary to engage in self-recrimination.

Even if you do not scold, but rather encourage and affirm, it is still possible that the child may be in his current situation.

Indeed, inferiority is a quality inherent to humans, given their relatively insignificant position in the natural order.

Furthermore, I have inquired with others, and it is evident that nearly everyone has experienced feelings of inferiority at one point or another. Therefore, it is crucial to recognize that the current circumstances of the child may be a reflection of this universal experience. It is essential to utilize this insight to take a moment for introspection, reflection, or rest, in order to release the accumulated stress and allow for personal healing.

It would be prudent to gather the requisite energy for the next stage of the journey, in order to set off in a more optimal state.

Furthermore, you are uncertain of the appropriate course of action. It may be beneficial to address these emotions directly.

It is possible to engage in dialogue and request assistance on this platform, as well as to take the initiative to seek help. In the event that one is uncertain about how to proceed in the presence of one's child, it may be helpful to prioritize self-care and personal well-being.

For example, it would be beneficial to establish a regular daily routine and engage in physical activity, while also pursuing activities that bring you joy. It is likely that your positive and optimistic demeanor will have a profound impact on your child. It is often the case that actions convey more meaning than words.

Inaction may be the most effective course of action in the present circumstances. It is possible that the current state of your child is not conducive to excessive intervention, and that he is not equipped to sustain this state for an extended period. This may be the optimal time to allow for natural progression.

It is advisable to allow the natural process to unfold at its own pace. Each individual will reach a point of flowering at a different time, and it is therefore important to be patient and allow the process to occur without undue intervention.

It is my sincere hope that this information will prove beneficial. Wishing you peace and joy!

Dear Poster, I am deeply concerned about the situation you have described regarding your son. You have already taken commendable steps, and I am confident that, together, we can help your son regain his confidence and happiness.

First and foremost, it is imperative to recognize that your son's current circumstances are not a result of his own actions, but rather the consequence of prolonged mistreatment and a lack of care. His current emotional state and behaviors are a natural response to protect himself, given the traumatic impact on his psyche.

It is therefore essential to treat him with a gentler and more understanding attitude in order to demonstrate our love and support.

With regard to the matter of consulting a psychologist, we can adopt a different approach to assist him. You may wish to consider placing some books or materials on mental health in his room or other locations where he spends time, so that he can see them unintentionally and gradually become interested and start to understand.

It may also be beneficial to invite friends or relatives he trusts to engage in conversation with him about his concerns, thereby fostering a sense of companionship and support.

Additionally, you may wish to consider implementing some strategies to assist him in reclaiming a sense of joy in life. One approach could be to assign him some straightforward household tasks, allowing him to gradually rebuild his self-assurance by starting with these relatively minor responsibilities.

Another option is to take him for a walk in order to allow him to experience the beauty and tranquility of nature, thereby providing him with an opportunity to relax and unwind.

Furthermore, I recommend that you engage in activities with your son that foster a positive parent-child relationship. These could include cooking together, watching movies, playing games, and other enjoyable activities.

Additionally, it is recommended to engage in in-depth conversations with the child to gain insight into their inner world and thoughts, and to provide them with the necessary support and encouragement.

In conclusion, it is important to remember that every child has their own unique growth process and rhythm. Patience and guidance are essential at times like these. With unwavering commitment and support, we can overcome challenges and restore a sense of hope and positivity in our lives.

I hope my advice will be of assistance. I hope your son will soon be able to overcome this challenging period and regain his happiness and confidence.

I encourage you to persevere.

Hello. I hope my answer helps.

I understand your worries and I can feel your guilt. I commend you for coming here for help. It takes courage, right?

Our advice is:

1. First, become more stable. Your child will also be affected when he senses your change.

If you want your child to change, you have to change too. If you keep scolding and hitting him, he'll keep avoiding you.

If you can stay calm when you're with him, he'll feel safe and come to you more.

You can become a more stable person by getting counseling, writing for therapy, meditating, and exercising. He will also be influenced by your role as a model.

2. Build a good relationship with your child. Show him you understand, accept, and respect him.

If you don't get along with your child, he won't listen to you. He needs to feel that you understand, accept, and respect him.

You can learn to communicate with your child in a way that is respectful and non-judgmental. This helps you understand each other better and can be healing for both of you.

3. Encourage and trust your child to build self-confidence. Believe that it is never too late.

You know that constant criticism makes him feel bad. Let's try a different approach. Keep showing him you appreciate him. Give him recognition and encouragement, even if he can do something small by himself.

Your child needs your appreciation, encouragement, and affirmation. Stay strong!

For your reference. Best wishes.

Hello, I'm Jokerev. I understand your anxiety and self-doubt, but you can get through this.

First of all, I want to tell you, as a counselor, that your reflection and deep love for your child are already taking the first step to change the situation. The current situation of your child is indeed very worrying, but you must remember that every life has the power to heal and grow.

We cannot change the past, but we can and should apologize to our children. We must tell them about our remorse and our determination to change. He may not be willing to communicate face-to-face for the time being, but you can try writing him a letter. You should sincerely convey your inner feelings and promise not to repeat past mistakes. You should also give him unconditional support and love.

You must be patient and persistent in the face of your son's low self-esteem and avoidance behavior. Forcing him to see a psychologist is not the answer. Start with his living environment. Create a comfortable, stress-free space, respect his daily routine, and slowly guide him back to a normal routine.

Also, find things that interest him or activities that he once loved to build bridges. Share music, books, movies, or other nonverbal activities to reconnect.

Seek advice from a family therapist. They can provide specific family interaction strategies and teach you how to improve the family atmosphere and repair parent-child relationships without causing the child to resent you.

Finally, I am going to encourage you with the words of the philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche: "What does not destroy me makes me stronger." This also applies to your son.

Your child will emerge from the darkness and find their own light as long as you are patient, understanding, and loving. Forgive yourself in the process because parents are also constantly learning and growing.

Dear Sir/Madam, I am pleased to be able to respond to your query and hope that I can be of assistance. From the information you have provided,

You are concerned about your son's current state of mind. He is now perceived as inferior, refuses to communicate, spends the majority of his time in his room, avoids social interaction, sleeps late at night and sleeps until noon, neglects personal hygiene, and only wears the same set of clothes. This situation is a source of concern for you and many other parents. When a child experiences difficulties, it is often the parents who express the greatest concern.

The subject believes that her emotional instability and the physical discipline she employed during her son's childhood have caused him significant psychological harm. She feels remorse and regret for the harm she has caused her son.

You are concerned about your son's well-being and wish to seek the guidance of a psychologist, yet he is reluctant to participate. You are uncertain about the best course of action.

It is important to note that the current issues your son is facing cannot be accurately assessed based on the information provided in your narrative alone. It is insufficient to simply state that your son is exhibiting signs of laziness, a negative mood, or psychological difficulties, or even a mental illness such as depression. It is unadvisable to make a casual diagnosis of depression without sufficient evidence.

This is a highly problematic approach. Regardless of whether your son is afflicted with a medical condition, it is unethical to label him.

Furthermore, it is inadvisable to assume that your son is depressed, as this may exacerbate your concerns.

Secondly, it is imperative to cultivate a trusting relationship with your son. From your account, it is evident that the relationship between you and your son is relatively distant, and communication is hindered.

It is imperative that you establish a trusting relationship with your son. To achieve this, you must first dissolve the barrier between you and your son, which can be likened to the spring breeze melting snow. In order to do so, you must reflect on your previous actions of scolding and beating your child. You must then express your remorse and apologize sincerely to your son. You must do the same with your own son.

A child who has been subjected to disciplinary actions such as scolding and beating may develop a resistance to the parent or caregiver and may also exhibit hostile behavior. It is essential to address the emotional opposition and resolve the resistance and hostility.

This will test the sincerity, patience, and love that the parent has for their child. If the parent can re-establish a trusting and close relationship with their child,

Subsequently, one can engage in discourse regarding the child's present condition. It is essential to ascertain the gravity of the situation by evaluating the underlying cause. This may entail determining whether the child is merely exhibiting signs of laziness, experiencing a transient mood disorder, or if there are underlying psychological issues, or even a more severe mental illness such as depression.

Subsequently, the appropriate measures must be taken. In the event that the issue is merely laziness, educational and persuasive measures must be employed. Conversely, if the problem is emotional outbursts, open and honest communication is necessary to defuse the situation.

In the event that the issue is a psychological problem or illness, it is imperative to persuade the individual to seek professional assistance.

The most crucial foundation for the aforementioned approach is the establishment of a trusting and close relationship between the parent and the child. It is essential that the parent demonstrates patience, sincerity, and communication on an equal footing with the child.

If one is sincere, it is possible to overcome any obstacle. Would you not agree?