What are the reasons for being impatient when talking to parents?

Hello. I believe many people can relate to your question and recall instances where they may have been impatient with their parents. I have experienced this myself. I would like to share my personal understanding with you in the hope that it may be helpful.

First of all, it is important to recognize that family relationships inherently contain a certain degree of conflict. As Chen Hai-xian insightfully observed, this conflict can be seen as a tension between the desire for belonging and the need for autonomy. Our bonds with family members are often the strongest and most enduring relationships we have in life. Apart from the survival dependence we experience in childhood, there is also a lifelong need for emotional belonging.

It is therefore understandable that we have an emotional attachment to our parents and that we have certain emotional expectations of them. However, at the same time, everyone ultimately has to grow up and become an independent individual, and this also means that there is a need for separation and personal space.

Sometimes, when we are with our parents, we may feel that our personal space is being restricted or interfered with. This can lead us to react in ways that are not always constructive, such as becoming impatient during communication or distancing ourselves from the conversation.

It is not uncommon for there to be a difference in perspective between parents and their children. Even if parents are open-minded and up to date with the times, their experiences and life stages may differ from those of their children, and their views, concepts and needs may be different. Disagreements are to be expected, whether on major issues like views on marriage and love or on minor daily details.

Every year around the Spring Festival holiday, we see spirited discussions online about young people feeling apprehensive about going home and facing pressure to get married. The segment "There is a kind of coldness called 'Mom thinks you're cold'," also reflects a family reality. When children feel that their parents are pushing for certain outcomes, they often feel frustrated. They want to let them know that "that's what you want, not what I want," but they also feel that communication is challenging or often ineffective, so they may express their dissatisfaction in a direct manner.

It is also worth noting that the relationship with parents is often particularly close, especially in families where there is a high degree of parental care. This can result in children being more relaxed and less concerned about other people's feelings and feedback than when dealing with people outside the family. To put it more colloquially, they may be less afraid of offending their parents, which can allow for more spontaneity in speech.

To improve communication with your parents, you might consider putting yourself in their shoes and listening to their thoughts first, to gain a better understanding of their background and needs. It may also be helpful to reflect on whether you feel your personal boundaries are being violated. If so, you may wish to think about what boundaries you would like to set. Then, when everyone is calm, you could look for an opportunity to communicate with your parents and tell them your needs.

It might also be helpful to remind yourself to pause for five seconds when you feel yourself becoming impatient, and to consider whether you could state the matter-of-factly instead.

The growth and change of the self is contingent upon one's ability to genuinely love others.

To truly love others in a professional context means to wish and facilitate the happiness of others, and to mentally accept, forgive, and accommodate everyone, including the exceptional, the average, and the less capable. If there are mistakes or shortcomings, they can be corrected. Everyone has the right to happiness, regardless of the nature or proximity of the relationship, whether it is beneficial or detrimental, and we all hope that others can be happy and improve. People can provide mutual support and even joy to each other. It is beneficial to love and accept others and oneself, to tolerate shortcomings and limitations, and to be kindhearted. This is to benefit others or society, not to dislike or reject average performers, not to be jealous or intolerant of high performers.

If you find it challenging to connect with others, it can lead to negative energy and emotional issues. To truly love others and adapt to people and situations, you must align your energy field to enhance your ability to form and maintain loving and mutually beneficial relationships and careers. You can also share and exchange insights, experiences, and interests with others in real life and online, such as through the Douban community.

Additionally, it is important to maintain a positive outlook on life and to appreciate the smaller aspects of it.

Negative energy can affect your physical health. Maintaining a comfortable and healthy body can provide a full-body massage. The head massage includes the forehead and face, which also have meridians. Use deep, firm strokes to massage the head, and use a firm massage brush to massage the stomach. Avoid massaging the stomach on an empty stomach, and then take a walk.

If you experience negative emotions, thoughts, or behaviors, you will not feel comfortable physically or mentally. You will often encounter unhappy people and things, interpersonal conflicts, relationship and marriage problems (which will affect your professional reputation), and even problems in your academic or career life. This is because when you are too self-centered or pursue self-interest, you accumulate a lot of negative energy. The more self-centered you are, the more your professional reputation will be negatively affected. You need to learn how to truly love others and adapt to people and things, correct your professional reputation, resolve conflicts, improve your emotions and professional relationships, and better solve the above problems. In addition, if you know how to truly love the people and things in the world, you will not be too attached to love, reduce negative emotions such as separation anxiety and pain, and will not feel lacking inside. You will feel happy and your life will become fulfilling and meaningful.

If necessary, they can also facilitate growth and change among those in their sphere of influence.

The manifestations of excessive self-centeredness vary from person to person. They include: 1. The psychological motivation to pursue self-satisfaction, striving for self or repressing self-deprecation to please others, blindly giving in order to gain, being afraid of losing, or disregarding the gains and losses of self-interest and emotions. 2. Being too narcissistic or inferior, paying too much attention to oneself, generating pressure and worry, social phobia, being caught up in one's own emotions and thoughts, attaching too much importance to what others think of oneself, not accepting one's own shortcomings and deficiencies, forcing oneself to be perfect, being obsessive, controlling, possessing others or forcing others to satisfy oneself, otherwise resenting and being discontent, being unable to let go of oneself to forgive and forgive, brooding.

If you focus solely on your own needs, you may experience feelings of anxiety, depression, and fatigue, which could hinder your ability to adapt to the dynamics of your school or workplace environment. Conversely, if you prioritize the well-being of others and adapt to your surroundings, you will naturally feel less self-focused and experience an increase in positive energy.

In summary, it is important to do your best, have good intentions, and avoid causing harm to others, as nobody wants to suffer as a result.

Dear Landlord, I can understand the kind of mood you're in from your description. I hope my sharing can bring you some inspiration and help.

As you outlined in the article, your best friend is engaged in a dispute with her mother, and you are in a similar situation with your own parents.

The reason you always come up with is that when you talk to your parents, you feel impatient and that they keep rambling on and on, similar to the behavior of the monk Tang Seng.

This is a common occurrence. As adults, we find it unpleasant when our parents address us in a manner that is reminiscent of childish behavior.

Parents are from the older generation and may not be aware of the latest trends and developments in the younger demographic.

It is possible that some of our parents' opinions and suggestions are not applicable to us.

Furthermore, when parents persist in their nagging behavior, it can evoke feelings of discomfort and irritation in their adult children.

However, we are all still children in our parents' eyes, regardless of our age.

It is worth noting that parents who engage in nagging behavior may be driven by a sense of emptiness and a lack of communication.

Upon their children's return, parents will consistently engage in dialogue with them and inquire about their activities.

Furthermore, the words our parents say often seem to us to be a constant repetition of a mantra.

When our parents express their opinions and offer advice, it is important to listen patiently and consider their perspective.

It is an unavoidable fact that we are our parents' children, and that they will always see us as such.

It is not uncommon to encounter videos on online platforms such as TikTok that explore the theme of children longing to care for their aging parents, despite their parents' declining health and ability to provide care themselves.

In the current climate, the perception is that parental nagging is not beneficial, but rather causes impatience.

It is also important to consider that as we grow older, our parents will also grow older.

Furthermore, it is important to adapt to our parents' nagging. After a few years, this may even become a source of enjoyment.

It would be beneficial to view our parents' nagging as a habit. When we have time, we should encourage them to nag, communicate, and interact with us more.

I hope you find these thoughts helpful.