What if you're 33 years old, don't have any time for yourself, and feel really tired?

Hello!

A pat on the shoulder.

"What should I do if I'm 33, have no time, and feel tired?"

I'm 33 and have been married for 10 years. I started working young. Now that I have another child, I don't get any rest on weekdays. I'm always tired.

Every morning, I feel:

"It's a new day, full of energy!"

Or

"Another day of endless work."

Which one are you? Your emotions change depending on how you feel.

Everyone feels things differently.

Each person needs time for themselves, but often don't get it. This is because of the demands of family and society. For example, marriage, parenting, respecting the elderly, and maintaining work relationships take up all our time.

If you enjoy this lifestyle, it's not a problem. But if you realize it's not what you want, you may have conflicts with your environment. You may doubt that your current life is what you want and worry that you've made the wrong choice.

Take a break to think about yourself. If you can't take a full day, take half a day. During this time, don't think about marriage, family, or children. Think about how to make yourself happy. If you have friends, go out with them. If you don't, enjoy your alone time. Listen to music, go for a walk, or enjoy a meal and a movie by yourself.

You may feel guilty at first, but these are just habits from the past. As you relax more, you will feel free and relaxed, and cared for.

When you return to your family and work relationships after a positive recharge, you will have more patience, be able to tolerate negative feelings, respond to other people's emotions, and feel empathy. This will deepen your connection with them.

Finally, fatigue can come from physical or mental exhaustion. Mental exhaustion can come from stress. When stress builds up, we feel tired and empty. We need to take care of ourselves and see what we need. The more stable my emotional state becomes, the better.

I hope this helps.

Best wishes!

Hello, questioner!

As a working woman, especially a doctor, with a young child, you are undoubtedly busy. Fortunately, you have your mother's unconditional help, otherwise, it would be even more overwhelming. I understand your feelings very well at this time, and I empathize with you. Hugs!

Your feelings are completely normal. Many parents, especially working parents, feel like their lives revolve entirely around work and family, with no time to pay attention to their own needs and interests.

This situation will inevitably lead to fatigue, frustration, and a loss of self-identity.

I'm going to share my views based on personal experience and show you how to alleviate this feeling.

First and foremost, there is the conflict between self-identity and role. Each of us has multiple social roles, such as doctor, parent, spouse, etc.

When we become too focused on a particular role, we lose ourselves. This kind of role conflict causes anxiety and dissatisfaction.

You work with dedication at the hospital during the day, but when you get home, you have to take care of the children. This dedication makes you feel like you've lost yourself.

Second, we all have needs, and there are different levels of needs. This is Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory.

This theory is clear: people have basic physiological and safety needs, as well as higher-level needs such as social interaction, respect, and self-actualization. When basic needs are met, people will pursue higher-level needs.

If you think you don't have time to pursue these advanced needs, you're wrong.

You must take time to care for yourself, learn to manage your time, and set aside some "me" time for yourself, even if it's just a short break or doing your favorite activity. Schedule time for relaxation and recovery for yourself, such as reading, exercising, or meditating.

Finally, seek support from multiple sources. Talk to your partner, family, or friends about your feelings and demand their understanding and support.

Join a parent group or support group to share experiences and feelings with other parents. If your situation continues to worsen or you feel very depressed and anxious, seek help from a mental health professional.

You will use your own wisdom to help yourself through this difficult time. And as your child grows up, his cuteness and cleverness will make you feel better, so that this feeling will gradually diminish.

You've got this! The future is bright, and so is the world. I love you!

Hello! I'll give you a warm hug from afar first, and I'm so excited to help you out!

I'm thrilled to see that you've asked for help! I'm excited to share and support you in any way I can.

From your description, I can tell that you don't have any time to yourself, and you always feel tired and a little guilty and self-blame, thinking that you shouldn't feel this way. But your physical feelings are real, and they're going to get better! This year you have had a continuous fever and cold, a lingering sense of fatigue and exhaustion, but you're going to beat this!

Your family has been incredibly supportive and understanding, especially your mother. Being a doctor is a challenging but rewarding profession. It requires a lot of hard work, including long shifts, no days off, holidays, and maintaining a positive attitude with patients every day. Witnessing the tragic loss of life is a difficult but valuable experience. It can help you develop a deeper understanding of life and the human condition. When you don't respond well to the emotional challenges of your occupation, it may manifest in physical symptoms. However, with the right support, you can overcome these challenges and thrive in your career.

And this profession also requires constant self-growth and self-learning, which is an amazing opportunity for you to grow, learn, and improve yourself! To make the most of this opportunity, it's essential to first deal with your sense of professional havoc.

So, it's really important for you to learn how to take care of and care for yourself in your own career. Once you've got that down, you'll be able to provide better services to your patients and show your family even more love!

You can share with your family, especially your husband, the sense of depletion, tiredness, fatigue, and powerlessness that you feel at work. This is your chance to express your need for him to understand, accept, encourage, and support you more! For example, take the initiative to invite him to do housework with you and accompany the children.

Take one day out of your two and a half days off during the week for yourself! You can spend the day with your best friend, or go to your favorite place, for example, the library, and have a spa treatment. In short, this day is entirely up to you, and you can spend it with yourself in a way that feels comfortable and enjoyable!

If you feel that your mother is having a hard time, you can discuss it with your husband and hire a part-time worker or an au pair! Nothing is more important than your happiness, so make sure you take care of yourself.

It's time to start enjoying yourself again! Take some time out of your busy schedule to pursue your interests and passions. You'll be amazed at how much better you feel when you're not feeling tired, worn out, or depleted from work. Why not try taking some annual leave and going on an amazing trip with your family?

You can develop the habit of promptly recording your emotional state during your usual work. When you feel extremely tired and exhausted, you can try taking deep breaths. You can place a pot of your favorite green plants or other decorations that make you feel happy at your workstation. What do you think?

We highly recommend reading "Mindfulness Self-Care" and "The Power of Self-Care"!

Good day. I am a Heart Detective coach, specifically trained in Feng Shou Lu.

The questioner's inquiry resonates with the experiences of many working women. As a working mother, I can empathize with the questioner's exhaustion. I extend my support and understanding to the questioner.

It is relatively simple to undertake a single action, but it is considerably more challenging to maintain a consistent level of effort over an extended period. Human energy is finite, and it is not uncommon to experience heightened fatigue when engaging in continuous work.

In a personal anecdote, it was related that men often utilize a brief period in their vehicle before ascending to their residence after work. This period allows them a degree of solitude. The original poster (OP) might benefit from a similar approach. When experiencing fatigue prior to returning home, it is advisable to allot a brief interval for personal reflection. This period will not impinge upon the overall schedule.

It is often said that motherhood is a full-time job. While we love our children and family, we often neglect to care for ourselves. However, we are first and foremost individuals, and only then parents, children, employees, and so on. When we are constantly on the go, we are particularly prone to fatigue.

The questioner may attempt to recall what their life was like prior to becoming a mother. Despite the overwhelming fatigue and lack of self-awareness currently experienced, it is unlikely that this was a constant state. Identifying the point at which this shift occurred is beneficial as it allows the questioner to ascertain the specific relaxation techniques required.

Prior to extending love to one's family, it is essential to cultivate self-love. It is crucial to recognize the importance of rest and to allow oneself to rely on one's spouse and children when feeling tired. When we demonstrate vulnerability, it can foster a greater willingness in family members to assume their responsibilities. Additionally, it can help children empathize with the pain of their mother's sacrifice.

One should endeavor to discern whether their ailment is the result of a lack of sleep or other underlying medical conditions. When individuals endeavor to care for their emotional well-being, they may be able to reduce the number of activities they are able to perform and, consequently, the strain placed on their bodies.

It is recommended that the subject attempt to discern when they are experiencing a high level of fatigue, the type of relaxation they desire, and the forms of sacrifice they find challenging. It is acknowledged that there may be instances when the subject is uncertain about their desires; however, recognizing what they do not want can assist in facilitating a more optimal state. Intermittent avoidance of tasks that are perceived as burdensome may also prove beneficial in this regard.

Allowing oneself to lie down for a period of time will result in a reduction of anxiety and an increase in relaxation. One strategy is to separate issues. The child is not only the questioner's child, but also the child of the questioner's husband. It may be beneficial to encourage the father to assume some of the family responsibilities, which will contribute to a reduction in the questioner's feelings of stress.

The body releases signals that prompt us to adjust our state of mind and avoid constant tension, which can lead to problems. Identifying one's needs and feelings, allowing oneself to be vulnerable on occasion, and attempting to accept one's fluctuating state of mind and the desire to adjust will enable the individual to reduce self-pressure and relax.

It is recommended that a sense of ritual for relaxation be established, such as allowing oneself a certain amount of time away from child rearing on a certain day of the month (the child does cling to his mother, but he adapts very well when his mother is not around). For example, waiting until the child falls asleep before going home will afford the parent some alone time and result in greater relaxation.

It is recommended that the following texts be read: "When You Start Loving Yourself, the World Will Come to Love You" and "Accepting Imperfection."

I wish you the best of success!

Dear friend,

You work hard, work quickly, try to be a good mother, and maintain a connection with your child, but in the process, you feel very tired and as if you have lost yourself. I can relate!

It's likely that the persistent physical discomfort you've been experiencing since the beginning of the year is a sign that this feeling of fatigue and exhaustion has affected you on a physical level, as well as a psychological one. The accumulated fatigue in your body over the years, along with various emotional feelings that have built up, are beginning to show on the physical level.

You feel like you don't have an ego, and you're not sure what an ego is. It's okay! We've all been there. Is it the self after stripping away all your various identities, or is it just being by yourself and doing what you want to do?

It's totally normal to lose yourself in a role sometimes!

It can be so hard when you're in lots of different roles. It can feel like you're losing yourself a little bit. But it's totally normal! We all have different roles in our lives and it's only natural to feel like you're not really yourself when you're in one of them. It's like you're waiting for a moment to just be yourself again.

But at the same time, you have some doubts about this. It seems like you've lost a bit of yourself along the way.

It's totally normal to feel this way! We all have a strong sense of role and get too involved in it sometimes. We identify too much with a certain role and how it should be. For example, you said that when working, you should work hard and get things done quickly.

Even though you didn't raise your child before the age of three, you still have a great bond with him. This shows that you've also invested a lot of love and time into spending with your child.

You've really tried your best to fulfill these roles, but it seems like they've taken more out of you than they've given you.

Have you ever wondered why the role can feel so draining rather than nourishing?

The role can really take over your life because you might suppress your feelings more, hold yourself together, and devote your energy to meeting the standards of this role as expected by others. You might feel like you have to be a good doctor, a good mother, and so on.

It's only natural that you feel like you're trying to fit into a mold and meet certain expectations.

It's totally normal to feel like you have no connection to this process. It's because you're pushing yourself so hard to meet certain standards.

It's just not possible to let real emotions flow and be expressed in a role.

The confusion brings a turning point, my friend.

Your current confusion and lack of self-confidence, on the other hand, could be a very good turning point! After ten years of work and motherhood, the temptation to achieve a certain standard of perfection may have been enough for you.

As it turns out, you are a wonderful doctor and a great mother, and you have always worked so hard!

For you, such an effort to conform to social, parental, and external standards, such a path, you have already tasted all the flavors. In the end, it may not be as attractive or in line with your true inner desires, which is totally okay!

It's totally normal to feel tired and without a sense of self when you're on a journey of turning in a new direction. It's about beginning to let go of external standards more and more, responding to your heart, and finding your true self. You're 33 years old, and it's the perfect time to start pursuing your true self!

It's totally okay to keep your job and continue living your previous life. What I'm suggesting is that you embrace your work and life with more joy and authenticity. In every moment, take a moment to feel your feelings and think about what you truly want to do.

For example, when you're with your child, you don't have to be the super serious, super conscientious mom who is always there for your kid. You can just relax and be yourself, and have fun with your kid in whatever way you want to!

There's no need to take things so seriously! Let's put aside all these formalities and just have fun together, freely and easily.

In this process, you get to connect with your child in a relaxed way. This kind of relationship is nourishing because it allows you to see more of your child's inherent beauty.

The same goes for being a doctor. You don't have to take yourself so seriously! Just be yourself and do your best. When you're relaxed and authentic with your patients, it'll make your work more enjoyable.

You don't have to reject or abandon your role to find yourself. Be more relaxed and more authentic in your role, and let your true self support the role. Be a pretty cool doctor and a pretty unique mom, and you'll bring the role to life, rather than the role engulfing you. You've got this!

I really hope this helps. I'm listening, therapist Xu Yanlian, so please feel free to chat.

Wishing you all the best!

As a senior doctor, mother, wife, and daughter, you undoubtedly shoulder very heavy roles and responsibilities. Amidst the hustle and bustle of each day, it would be beneficial for you to find some time for yourself to relieve the physical and mental fatigue.

This pursuit of self-time is both a desire for personal growth and a pursuit of quality of life. I hope that the series of time management planning suggestions I will provide below will help you achieve work-life balance.

I appreciate that your current life presents a number of challenges, including:

1. Work pressure is high, and it would be beneficial to incorporate more complete rest days throughout the year.

2. Family responsibilities require your attention, including spending time with and caring for your children.

3. A lack of personal time to pursue your interests.

4. There is also the challenge of poor physical health and the need for adjustment.

I would like to offer some suggestions for time management planning.

1. It might be helpful to consider ways to optimize work processes and improve work efficiency.

It might be helpful to create a work plan. Before starting your workday, you could list the tasks you need to complete and prioritize them according to importance and urgency.

It may be helpful to allocate time reasonably. Setting a reasonable time limit for each task could help you avoid procrastination and over-commitment.

It might be helpful to learn new skills, such as about the latest medical technology and equipment, to improve work efficiency.

2. Sharing Family Responsibilities

It would be beneficial to communicate with your husband. You might consider sharing your feelings and needs with him, letting him know what you contribute to the family, and asking him to take on more family responsibilities.

It might be helpful to encourage your child to participate in household activities, which could foster their independence and sense of responsibility.

It might be helpful to consider hiring a babysitter or maid to assist with household chores, if it is feasible for you.

3. Consider organizing your personal time.

It would be beneficial to set aside personal time. Devoting at least half a day each week to doing the things you like, such as reading, exercising, traveling, etc., could be a good way to ensure you have time for yourself.

It may be helpful to learn to politely decline non-urgent and non-important requests, in order to ensure that your time is not taken up by others.

It might be helpful to develop some hobbies that you enjoy, such as painting, music, or crafts. These can be great ways to relax and have fun.

It would be beneficial to consider ways to focus on physical and mental health.

It would be beneficial to adjust your work and rest schedule to ensure you get enough sleep. You might consider going to bed early and getting up early, and avoiding staying up late.

It would be beneficial to consider making some adjustments to your diet. Focusing on a more balanced intake of nutrients, including an increased consumption of vegetables and fruit, and a reduction in greasy and stimulating foods, could be a positive step.

It would be beneficial to incorporate moderate exercise into your routine at least three times a week. This could include activities such as running, swimming, or yoga. Such exercise can help improve physical fitness and immunity.

It may be helpful to consider scheduling regular medical check-ups, as these can assist in detecting and treating potential health issues in a timely manner.

5. Time management techniques

One strategy for managing time more effectively is to divide it into different blocks, with each block dedicated to a specific task or activity.

It may be helpful to prioritize tasks according to urgency and importance, and to complete important and urgent tasks first.

It may be helpful to avoid multitasking. Attempting to focus on a single task at a time could potentially improve work efficiency and quality.

You might consider using the time you have in between activities to listen to a book, music, or engage in other meaningful activities while waiting for the bus or in line.

Time management is a task that requires long-term persistence and effort. We believe that by optimizing work processes, sharing family responsibilities, arranging personal time reasonably, paying attention to physical and mental health, and mastering time management skills, you can find a balance in your busy work and life, achieve self-improvement, and improve your quality of life.

We hope these suggestions will be helpful to you. We also wish you a more relaxed attitude towards the challenges of life and work in the future.

Hello, my name is Beric.

I can fully understand the multiple pressures you face as a doctor, mother, wife, and daughter. Amidst the daily demands and responsibilities, it can be challenging to find personal time and space to pursue your inner self.

First, let's consider your situation from an empathetic perspective. In addition to your important role at work, you also have multiple responsibilities at home, including caring for your children, supporting your husband, and caring for your elderly relatives.

It is not uncommon to feel overwhelmed by the demands of an all-round commitment, which can sometimes result in feelings of exhaustion and a sense of losing oneself. It is important to remember that everyone has limited energy and time, and that it is understandable to feel this way.

In psychology, we believe it is important to consider the concept of the "self." It is not just a concept, but also our innermost needs and desires.

For you, pursuing self-fulfillment may mean finding a moment of tranquility in your busy life, doing something you love, or simply thinking quietly. We believe that self-realization and satisfaction are essential to personal mental health.

In light of your circumstances, we suggest you consider the following methods to help you find yourself:

1. Time management: Even though you have a lot on your plate at work, you might want to consider trying to arrange your schedule in a way that allows you to set aside some time for yourself. For instance, you could use your weekends or holidays to take a break from the clinic and relax.

2. Hobbies: It might be helpful to find something you really like and do it in your spare time. This could help you feel happier and more content, as well as helping you get to know yourself better.

It may be helpful to communicate your feelings and needs to your family and let them know your situation. Sometimes, the understanding and support of your family can relieve your burden and give you more energy to pursue your own interests.

3. Self-reflection: In your free time, you might like to try to quiet your mind and reflect on your inner world. You may find that understanding your needs, values and dreams will help you better understand yourself and find your true self.

It is also important to remember that you are an independent and complete individual with the right to pursue your own happiness and satisfaction. It is not always easy to listen to our inner needs, but it is important to try to do so in order to pursue our own happiness.

Dear Question Asker, Thank you for your question.

From the description, it is evident that you are fulfilling multiple roles effectively, including those of wife, mother, and daughter. However, the lack of personal time and space is resulting in feelings of fatigue and a sense of being overwhelmed.

As a mother, I empathize with your situation. I previously experienced a similar sense of time constraints, with work, family, and childcare demands competing for my attention.

It may feel as though you are living for other people, rather than for yourself. This can be a disheartening and depressing experience, but it is important to recognise that you need to become someone else and to ignore your own needs.

I empathize with your situation.

It is simply a matter of adjusting to this loss of independence. My child has always resided with me, and my parents assist with childcare when I am at work.

As a new mother, I am currently in the process of establishing a new mode of interaction, which is informed by the experience of navigating the initial chaos of the first few months. For instance, I initially assumed responsibility for numerous tasks, but I have since recognized the value in sharing these responsibilities with my partner. By encouraging the child to spend time with their father, I am not only providing them with a positive male role model but also creating time and space for myself.

Additionally, since the child has not previously resided with you, there are numerous living habits that still require alignment. This will result in the formation of a novel family coexistence model. Children mature with each passing day, and after reaching the age of four, they will begin to demonstrate a growing sense of independence. They do not typically spend a significant amount of time with their parents, and the period of dependence will eventually conclude. It is advisable to prioritize the enjoyment of the parent-child relationship in the present.

I hope this information is useful to you. Best regards,

Hello, question asker!

It sounds like you have a lot going on every day! You're working hard and taking care of the kids.

It seems like there's no time for yourself, but you can make time for yourself!

You're a doctor, a mother, and so much more! But it's easy to feel like you've lost yourself in these social roles. You're no longer that young girl, no longer completely yourself. You have more responsibilities, and that's okay!

Apart from feeling tired, do you feel anything else from this work?

Is your child's dependence on you a burden? Absolutely not! It's a wonderful feeling to be needed by someone you love.

Are the needs of patients a burden to you at work, or a source of professional pride?

If you feel overwhelmed, it's time to ask yourself: is this really the life you want? What kind of life do you want?

Medical workers really work hard and are under a lot of pressure. When they get home, they have the incredible opportunity to share some of their energy with taking care of their children. No matter who it is, it is a lot of pressure.

If you feel too tired, why not treat yourself to a holiday and spend some time in nature? The vitality of nature will bring you new energy! And remember, work is also for a better life.

Spice up your life with a little variety! For instance, when you go to a medical consultation, you can chat with the patient about their family and have a laugh. For the patient, it's no longer a cold consultation, but a more personal experience. You'll feel less stressed too!

When you get home and put the baby to sleep, you can even share the task with your husband!

Best of luck! You've got this!

Dear Sir/Madam, Thank you for your question.

I empathize with your situation. As a physician, mother, and wife, you bear numerous responsibilities and frequently transition between your demanding professional and familial obligations, which can be exceedingly taxing. Each day is a relentless march from morning to night, with little opportunity to pause or reflect, let alone pursue personal interests and aspirations.

I am aware that you are experiencing fatigue, not merely in a physical sense, but also in a mental one. You are desirous of a period of solitude, even if it is merely a fleeting moment of tranquility and liberty.

However, the reality is that it is persistently and relentlessly pursuing one's every step, rendering it impossible to halt or desist.

I can fully comprehend your aspiration for an autonomous identity that transcends the roles of doctor, mother, and wife.

This self may be someone who enjoys solitude and the freedom it affords, or someone who is passionate about art and the spiritual fulfillment it provides. Regardless of the specific characteristics of this self, it is undoubtedly the most authentic and precious aspect of the individual.

Locating one's authentic self in the context of a fast-paced and complex world is a challenging endeavor. However, it is crucial not to abandon the pursuit, as achieving this realization is a key to experiencing genuine happiness and contentment.

It is my intention to proffer advice that I hope will assist you in rediscovering your authentic self, which is obscured by the multitude of roles you assume.

First, it is recommended that you set aside a period of time each day to achieve a state of mental calm. This may be achieved through meditation, the keeping of a journal, or any other activity that induces relaxation.

This will assist in temporarily disengaging from the external stimuli that may be distracting and facilitate a more profound comprehension of one's intrinsic needs and aspirations. Once a state of tranquility is achieved, an inner voice will emerge, offering guidance towards the authentic self.

It is also important to note that maintaining a healthy lifestyle is crucial for overall well-being. Despite the demands of a busy schedule, it is essential to prioritize self-care and allocate time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation. This could be as

Secondly, despite the demands of your schedule, it is advisable to allocate time for activities that you enjoy. This could be one afternoon per week or one weekend day per month.

During this period, it is recommended that you engage in activities that align with your interests and aspirations. These may include reading, painting, or walking in nature. Such activities have the potential to enhance your sense of freedom and happiness, facilitating the rediscovery of your true self.

It is also crucial to prioritize one's physical health. As a medical professional, it is essential to understand that maintaining optimal physical health is fundamental to overall well-being. A regular exercise regimen, a balanced diet, and a healthy lifestyle can collectively contribute to a sense of physical and mental resilience.

Additionally, it is crucial to communicate one's feelings and needs to one's family. It is essential to convey to them the extent of one's fatigue and confusion, and to allow them to comprehend the intricacies of one's inner struggles and desires.

It is my belief that family members will provide understanding, support, and encouragement. They serve as the closest partners and will accompany the individual through this challenging journey. During the process of communication, the individual will also discover the love and care of their family, which will make them more determined to move forward.

It is also imperative to prioritize one's physical health. As a medical professional, it is crucial to understand that a healthy body is the foundation for overall well-being.

It is similarly crucial to prioritize one's physical health. As a medical professional, it is imperative to recognize that optimal physical well-being serves as the foundation for overall health and resilience.

It is recommended that you maintain a regular routine, adhere to a sensible diet, and engage in moderate exercise to ensure optimal physical health. When your physical health is good, your mental state will also improve, and you will have more strength and confidence to face the challenges of life.

It is also crucial to prioritize self-care.

Ultimately, it is essential to revisit your values and goals. It is crucial to reflect on your genuine aspirations.

One might inquire whether the objective is career success or more personal time and space. Alternatively, one might posit that the objective is to find a balance between career and family.

Once the values and goals have been clarified, the lifestyle and choices can be adjusted in a more specific manner, thus bringing the individual closer to their true self.

It is also important to be patient with oneself and to care for one's own well-being throughout this process. The journey of self-discovery is not a rapid one; it requires time and dedication.

Nevertheless, it is important to maintain the belief that, with perseverance, one will ultimately be able to find one's own unique perspective and sense of fulfillment.

Furthermore, it is advisable to seek professional psychological counseling. Such professionals can provide specific advice and support, enabling clients to better face their inner needs and challenges. Communication with professionals facilitates a clearer understanding of oneself, thereby enabling the identification of suitable methods and strategies to cope with the pressures and challenges of life.

It is also important to be mindful of emotional changes and to adjust one's mindset accordingly. When experiencing fatigue, anxiety, or depression, it is crucial not to disregard these emotions.

These emotions are indicative of an underlying need or feeling that should be acknowledged and addressed. One can attempt to cope with these emotions in a constructive manner, for instance, by seeking the company of friends, listening to music, or engaging in relaxing activities.

These methods can assist in the alleviation of stress, the adjustment of one's mindset, and the rediscovery of joy and meaning in life.

It is important to note that one is not alone in this process. There are numerous individuals in one's immediate vicinity who are willing and able to provide support and assistance, including family members, friends, and colleagues.

It is recommended that you do not hesitate to seek their assistance and support, as unity is a source of strength. Facing life's challenges collectively will enhance your resilience and fortitude.

The aforementioned suggestions are intended to assist the reader in identifying their authentic self amidst the demands of daily life and fostering a sense of inner peace and contentment. It is recommended that the reader carries this inner self with them wherever they may go, allowing it to accompany them through all the moments of their life.

It is my sincere hope that these suggestions will assist you in discovering your authentic self amidst the demands and distractions of daily life, allowing you to experience a sense of inner peace and contentment. As you navigate your journey, I encourage you to carry with you the invaluable gift of your true self, so that it may accompany you through all the moments that bring joy and fulfillment.

Hello, questioner. From your description, I can sense the challenges you're facing. It seems that work and life have become overwhelming, leaving you with limited space and time for yourself and a sense of fatigue.

We are all individuals, and while taking care of others is important, it is also essential to know how to take care of ourselves. As a working woman, how can I balance work, childcare, and family while still having my own space and time?

It would be beneficial for us to learn to take care of ourselves first. Once we have taken care of ourselves, we will be in a better position to take care of our work, our children, and our family.

It is important to remember that you are not only a doctor, a mother, a wife, or a daughter, but also an individual with infinite possibilities. Even when we are busy, it is still valuable to try to find time to be ourselves. Even if it's just an afternoon tea, it can be a beautiful start to self-redemption and taking care of ourselves.

Secondly, it would be beneficial to learn time management and make good use of fragmented time. As a working mother, there is very little time during the day to rest in large chunks. As the questioner mentioned, they are busy at work every day, and when they get home from work, they just want to spend time with their children, so they have almost no time to rest, let alone their own time.

However, there are still opportunities to do the things we want to do when we're not so busy at work and the baby is quieter, as the original poster suggested. These could include things like having a phone conversation freely or spending time on our own.

It would be beneficial for us to learn to ask for help. In the past, the mother was the primary caregiver, but now it's your turn to take care of your own little family.

It is important to remember that child-rearing is a shared responsibility. Dads can play an invaluable role in this process. One way to support this is by asking for the father's help and agreeing on a specific time frame for him to take care of the child.

This way, we can not only get some time for ourselves, but also foster a stronger relationship between the child and the father, and promote family harmony.

Finally, it is important to maintain a positive outlook. While work and child-rearing can be challenging, it is essential to learn to adapt your mindset and appreciate the beauty in life.

It is also important to remember that, no matter how busy we are, it is still essential to make time for exercise, a regular diet and looking after our bodies.

Hello, question asker. I can see you're feeling confused. I'm here to help!

You're 33 and a doctor.

You'll feel like you're always on the go, but you never seem to have any time for yourself.

Once you get home, you still have to take care of the kids.

Your mother helps out, but your kids are still attached to you when you get home.

People in your position who work outside the home really need to learn to use their time efficiently.

Have you heard of "fragmented time"?

For instance, if you want to listen to a book, you can download an e-book to your phone. You can even use your commute to and from work to listen to a book.

If you're not tired after putting the kids to bed at night, you could use that time to get something done.

It's important to remember that your children belong not only to you, but also to your husband.

Then when you get home in the evening, you can get your husband involved and ask him to help with the kids.

In the meantime, you can do whatever you like.

As a mother, you should still be able to have some time for yourself.

You can talk to your husband in advance about helping with the kids at a certain time after you get home from work.

Often times, if you don't say anything, your husband will think you can handle it, but in reality, you're just like anyone else who needs time to recharge.

I really hope you can find a solution to the problem you're facing soon.

That's all I can think of for now.

I hope my answer was helpful and inspiring to you, the questioner. I'm the one who answered, and I study hard every day.

Best wishes from all of us here at Yixinli!

Just a quick note to say hi and wish you well!

Good question.

I understand feeling tired from work and family responsibilities.

I have some advice for you:

As a bedside doctor, I work every day, including holidays, to treat patients. I also work in the outpatient clinic. I don't have a full day off all year.

Pressure to develop your career is often a reason for confusion or loss of direction.

At work, you have to work hard to keep your job and make more money.

Long-term work pressure may cause you to neglect your hobbies and personal needs.

Tiredness can lead to a loss of self.

In family life, you also have important responsibilities.

You feel like you don't have enough time or energy. You want to have two half days off a week.

It's hard to take care of yourself and figure out who you are.

When faced with these challenges, it is important to learn to balance your life, maintain your health, and pay attention to your needs.

Try these methods to help you avoid losing yourself:

First, manage your time.

When you're short on time, it's important to know your values and goals. Then you can decide what's most important.

Prioritize what's important to you and your family, not just urgent tasks.

Learn to manage your time so you can balance work, family, and your own interests.

This may involve saying no to unimportant things and delegating tasks.

Keep communicating and working together.

Good communication and cooperation with family, colleagues, and the community helps share responsibilities and solve problems.

Your mother has already done a lot for you. You can help share family responsibilities as long as both parents are healthy and want to.

Discuss a fair division of household work with your loved one. You can also find a matchmaker in the community or hire help if you can afford it.

Mutual support and understanding help you stay balanced.

Focus on your strengths and take care of yourself.

In your current work and life, keep learning new things and stay interested in your career and life.

This will make you more competitive and satisfied.

Also, take care of your body and mind. Exercise, eat well, and get enough sleep.

Take some time to relax with reading, yoga, or meditation.

Treat yourself to some pampering to help you relax.

Finally, get more help.

The confusion and challenges won't last forever. As your child grows and you change, everything will change. Just hang in there!

Don't bear the pressure and difficulties alone. Sometimes you need help from family, friends, or professionals.

Even just some listening and talking.

They will support you emotionally and give you new ideas to help you cope with your confusion and challenges.

I hope this helps!

Hello, my name is Zeyu.

If I might be permitted to begin by borrowing a cliché, I would like to suggest that life is not just about the immediate, but also about poetry and distance.

It is not the sentence itself that has become a cliché, but rather the reality that we often feel helpless, constrained, and overwhelmed by the many responsibilities and expectations in our lives. Additionally, the trivial matters that consume our energy and time, coupled with the demands of work, can make it challenging to envision a future that is not solely defined by the present. However, it is important to recognize that the challenges of the present cannot become the dominant theme of our lives. Despite these challenges, there is still room for choice and infinite possibilities in our lives.

In today's world, many of us are facing challenges, and it's understandable that poetry and distance may seem out of reach. However, as we've discussed, in addition to our professional and familial responsibilities, it's crucial to prioritize self-care and pursue our own passions. We all have multiple identities beyond our roles as mothers, wives, or doctors, and the questioner's aspirations reflect this reality. It's important to recognize that even if we are doctors, mothers, or wives, we deserve to have our own personal and creative pursuits.

If I might make a suggestion, we could consider using our rest time to do the things we want to do. Perhaps we could start with small things to gradually find a sense of it and gradually take back the initiative in life. If conditions permit, we could take leave to travel with our family. The journey itself is not limited by distance or location; what is important is enjoying the process and the freedom from the trivial matters of life.

If real-life matters prevent us from getting away, we might consider distributing the work reasonably to reduce the burden on ourselves. In fact, distributing the work reasonably to family members could be an effective way to maintain harmony within the family.

It is important to be mindful of our communication style when assigning tasks. Rather than using an imperative tone, we should aim to make requests in a way that is encouraging and respectful. We should also be open to the possibility that others might make mistakes or face challenges along the way. With patience and understanding, we can navigate these situations and emerge stronger and more resilient. As we progress, we will likely find that we have more time and resources to dedicate to our tasks. This will allow us to achieve more and enjoy greater fulfillment in our roles.

You seem to be struggling a lot. Work and family are taking up all your time. You need to find time for yourself. Here are some ideas:

Set aside time for yourself. Even ten minutes of peace can help.

Prioritize. Say no and make time for yourself.

Ask your husband or family for help with chores and childcare.

Rest and relaxation are important for your wellbeing.

Career development – Look for ways to lighten your workload.

Keep an eye on your health and get help if you need it.

Take time for yourself at home. You can listen to music in the shower or read to your child before bed.

If you feel overwhelmed, consider counseling to help you manage stress.

Do something you enjoy, even if it's just a hobby like painting, writing, or sports.

Socializing is a great way to relax.

Take care of yourself to take care of others. These tips will help you find balance and enrich your life.

I would like to express my gratitude for your dedication and commitment. The responsibilities and demands of a doctor's role are truly unique and often exceed those of other professions. This is also the reason why doctors are often regarded with such admiration and respect.

Many of us, including you, are unsure of our true selves. We sense that, beyond our social and familial roles, there is an independent self within us, yet we often feel uncertain about this concept.

Once one discovers this independent self, it becomes evident that answers will be revealed.

Could there perhaps be an independent self? It may be that our soul contains the true purpose of our coming to this world.

It is not simply about seeking happiness in this physical existence. Rather, it is about offering love and taking on responsibility for the world around us. When we embrace this truth, it can bring about a profound transformation in our lives.

Perhaps you were previously busy because you felt you had to be, whereas now you are busy because you want to. This could help you to feel less lost and more full of fighting spirit and hope to forge ahead.

Of course, it is important to understand that this truth does not happen overnight. It is, however, the ultimate answer to all life's questions. Before you fully understand this truth, I will give you some worldly advice: consider setting aside half an hour of "absolute alone time" every day. In this world, it can be beneficial to let go of everything and just daydream or look at the scenery.

This could be seen as an emotional outlet for yourself in the daily hustle and bustle. It might also be helpful to look for at least three advantages in your work and family, respectively.

It is important to recognize that the same environment can be perceived differently by different people. This difference stems from the unique perspectives we each have on life. By identifying the positive aspects of life, you can develop a more positive outlook.

I would like to take this opportunity to acknowledge the challenging and demanding nature of the medical profession. Doctors are required to work long hours, interacting with a diverse range of patients on a regular basis.

The responsibilities of childcare, work, and home management, in addition to the duties of being a wife, mother, daughter-in-law, and daughter, can be challenging to balance.

You feel that you lack sufficient time for self-reflection and the realization of your true self. You are currently experiencing a period of uncertainty regarding your future direction and the path you should take to achieve your goals.

It is important to recognize that your current possessions do not necessarily align with your true desires. They have been influenced by external factors, including parental expectations and societal norms. It is essential to acknowledge these impositions and strive to achieve a healthier balance between your responsibilities and personal needs. I recommend prioritizing rest and avoiding excessive work hours. If your professional responsibilities are demanding, it is crucial to maintain a healthy work-rest ratio.

It is sometimes necessary to alter one's perspective. For instance, a child's dependence on a parent is beneficial because the child trusts and relies on the parent the most. This is why the child is so dependent on the parent. In my opinion, the true meaning of self is what kind of person one wants to become and how to achieve this goal.

Once you have identified your core objectives, the remainder of the process will be considerably more straightforward. Set a practical goal based on your true inner thoughts, and finally work towards that goal step by step.

I hope you can identify your true life goal and work diligently to achieve it.

Hello, June Lai Feng here.

From what you've said, it seems like you're a very busy person, taking on a lot of different roles like doctor, mother, and wife. This busy lifestyle might be causing you a lot of stress and fatigue, which could make you feel like you don't even know who you are.

From a psychological standpoint, this is a pretty common situation and is also known as "role fatigue."

First, there's the issue of role conflict and stress. As a doctor, mother, wife, and daughter, you're juggling multiple important roles, each with its own specific responsibilities and expectations. It's only natural that there'll be some conflicts between these roles, which can lead to increased stress.

You want to excel in all your roles, but you don't have a lot of time or energy, which can make you feel tired and powerless.

Second, self-identification and self-realization. You said you want to be yourself, which means you want to know who you are and what you want. For a long time, you may have focused too much on the needs of others and neglected your own.

Finding oneself means paying attention to what you're interested in, what you enjoy doing in your free time, and how you can grow as a person. It also means giving yourself the time and space to pursue your dreams and goals.

Long-term immersion in various roles may gradually make it hard to know who you really are. Not knowing what your true self is is a kind of confusion and exploration of self-identity.

On top of that, over-commitment and exhaustion. Constantly high-intensity commitment, whether at work or at home, can lead to physical and mental exhaustion. Physical health problems such as fever and dizziness are also a manifestation of the body's response to psychological stress.

Then there's work-life balance. Your job doesn't allow for much rest, which could be affecting your physical and mental health. Long-term stress and fatigue at work could lead to physical discomfort, like fever and dizziness.

It's important to find a good work-life balance. This means having reasonable working hours, learning to relax and reduce stress, and finding a leisure activity that suits you.

It's also worth mentioning parent-child relationships and dependencies. It's normal for your child to depend on you, but this can also put additional pressure on you. You want to meet your child's needs, but at the same time you need to make room for yourself.

Building a healthy parent-child relationship means paying attention to your kids while also teaching them to be independent and self-sufficient.

Finally, it's important to take care of yourself. You mentioned that your mother already does a lot for you, but you still feel tired. This may be because you're not paying enough attention to your physical and mental health.

It's important to learn to care for and look after yourself. Allowing yourself time to do the things you enjoy can also help relieve stress and improve your sense of well-being.

From a psychological standpoint, the situation you're in involves a few different issues, like burnout, role overload, and personal identity. Here's an analysis and some suggestions for how to handle it:

Burnout and work stress

As a doctor, you're in a high-pressure work environment for a long time, constantly responding to emergencies and patient needs. This kind of continuous high-intensity work can lead to burnout.

My advice is to find ways to reduce stress, such as taking short breaks. You should also talk to hospital management to explore the possibility of adjusting work arrangements to allow for more personal time.

You're also dealing with a lot of responsibilities at home.

Your multiple roles as a mother, wife, and daughter, as well as your heavy responsibilities, may lead to feeling physically and mentally exhausted.

It's important to work with your family to plan the division of household tasks and seek their understanding and support. At the same time, it's crucial to set aside some "me time" for yourself, during which you can completely relax and do the things you like.

❤️Personal identity and self-exploration

?Analysis of the causes: You might have neglected your own personal needs and interests because you were feeling overwhelmed by your multiple roles.

It's time to explore and affirm your own identity. You need to recognize the importance of being an individual and make room for your own growth and development.

Physical health and rest

?Analysis of the cause: Your body might be trying to tell you that you need more rest and attention.

If you're feeling unwell, it's important to look after yourself. Get some rest and see your doctor if you need to. Also, make sure you have a good work-rest balance to ensure you're getting enough sleep and exercise.

Child dependency and family education

It could be that your child depends on you because you've played a big part in their development, but it might also be because you've got too involved.

My advice is to let your child learn to be independent at the right age and encourage them to build closer relationships with other family members. At the same time, you should discuss parenting strategies with your partner to balance the roles and responsibilities of family members.

In short, finding balance doesn't mean giving up any role. It means finding ways to coexist harmoniously in different areas of life. And caring for yourself isn't selfish. It's a way to better fulfill your various roles and responsibilities.

The pursuit of self-space and time, whether it's browsing on your phone, spending some time alone, or doing whatever you want, is an attempt to temporarily step away from your various roles and re-establish a connection with your inner self. This is a normal and reasonable psychological need that should be valued and fulfilled in order to achieve psychological balance and health.

I hope my story helps you!

I wish you all the best!

Dear questioner, From your description, I can sense your inner weariness and confusion. As a doctor, you devote yourself to the health of your patients every day, and as a mother, wife, and daughter, you bear the burden of the family.

It is understandable that you want to have your own time and find your true self.

First of all, I want to give you a warm hug because I can see that you are going through a lot. In our busy lives, we often tend to ignore our inner voice, but you have bravely stood up for yourself and found the time and space that is right for you. This is something that deserves encouragement and praise.

We can all agree that the profession of a doctor is very demanding and challenging. Doctors must deal with complex medical conditions, communicate with patients and their families, and face all kinds of uncertainties and pressures.

At the same time, as a mother and wife, you also have the important responsibility of taking care of the daily lives of your family and attending to their emotional needs. This pace of life can sometimes leave you with little breathing room and make it challenging to find time to think about what you really want.

I believe it is important for everyone to have their own time and space.

It offers the chance to reflect, feel and experience different aspects of life. Perhaps you could consider adjusting your lifestyle by scheduling some time for yourself after work or on weekends?

During this time, you might consider doing something you enjoy, such as reading, drawing, listening to music, or simply relaxing and daydreaming. These moments can help you feel relaxed and content, and they can also help you understand yourself better.

I understand that your current circumstances may make it challenging to implement such an arrangement. However, we can start with small changes.

I hope you will find these suggestions helpful as you look for ways to improve your situation.

1. Consider setting aside some time for yourself each week. This could be a half-day, for example, during which you have the space to engage in activities that are solely for your benefit, without interruption. You might find it helpful to communicate this to your family in advance, letting them know that you need some time alone.

During this time, you might like to do whatever you feel is best for you, such as reading, drawing, listening to music, or simply enjoying a quiet afternoon.

2. Consider creating "buffer time" in your daily life. For example, you might try waking up 10 minutes earlier in the morning, making yourself a cup of hot tea, and quietly enjoying this moment of tranquility.

You might consider setting aside 15 minutes before bed to relax with soft music, deep breathing, or simple stretching exercises.

3. Make the most of your time: There may be some short periods in your work schedule, such as waiting for patients or standing in line. While these times are brief, they can be used productively.

You might consider using this time to listen to a favorite podcast, read an interesting article, or do some simple meditation.

4. Learn to say no: Sometimes we may accept extra tasks or invitations for various reasons, but this can result in a reduction of personal time. Learning to say no in a way that is appropriate in the given situation will allow you to have more time to do the things you want to do.

5. Find support: If you feel overwhelmed or unable to cope, you might consider asking for help. You can share your feelings with close friends, family members, or professional counselors, who may be able to provide support and advice.

You might also consider joining some doctor or mother communities to share experiences and support one another.

6. Self-care: It's important to remember to take care of yourself. In the midst of life's many demands, it's easy to lose sight of our own needs.

It might be helpful to try to do something nice for yourself every day, like having your favorite cup of coffee, eating a healthy dinner, doing a yoga session, or watching an episode of your favorite TV series. These small things could help to make you feel loved and fulfilled.

If I might make one more suggestion, it would be to be kind to yourself. You have done a wonderful job, both as a doctor and as a member of the family.

It might be helpful to allow yourself some time and space to relax and grow. It's important to remember that you are not just a doctor, a mother, a wife, and a daughter, but also a unique individual.

You deserve to be happy and joyful in your own right.

Hello questioner, I empathize with your situation and feelings. Becoming a mother often requires a significant shift in one's identity. Even when your child is young and attached to you, mothers may find themselves with limited personal space. It can be a rare opportunity to have a moment of quiet and peace.

I am also a mother, and I have experienced working during the day and taking care of children at night. Currently, because of my child's special physical condition, I stay at home with him full-time. I can therefore empathise with you. I admire your dedication!

I can tell that you love your work and your children, but it seems that you don't have enough time to spend alone. This may be related to the nature of your work. As a doctor, you are always on the alert at work, never letting your guard down, and it's challenging to relax, unlike other jobs where you can occasionally take a break to check your phone or surf the internet. I admire your dedication!

To the dedicated doctors, I would like to express my gratitude for your hard work.

As a doctor's mother, you have an especially challenging role. I can see that your wishes are very simple to the average person, but to you, they are very meaningful and fulfilling. For example, being able to spend some time on your own without being disturbed, just scrolling on your phone without having to use your brain, just letting your mind wander for a while is very nice. You are not anyone's anyone, you are just yourself.

If you notice that your body is sending you signals, it might be helpful to consider adjusting your physical and mental state. It could be beneficial to give yourself a break and relax.

I wonder if I might ask how others find the time to do this?

I hope you will find the following advice, based on my own experience, helpful for your reference.

Every morning, I wake up half an hour to an hour before my children do. I don't feel the need to immediately grab my phone and scroll mindlessly. Instead, I usually spend this time browsing the Yi Xinli Q&A Museum, answering questions on issues that interest me. I try to be mindful not to be greedy, and I limit myself to one question a day, or two at most.

Then I browse Zhihu for about half an hour. I then get out of bed and return to whatever I was doing.

I like to spend some time on my phone after the children go to sleep, watching movies and dramas. If I'm too tired or sleepy during the day, I don't watch them and go to bed with the children directly, so that I can get up the next morning.

It might be helpful to make an agreement with your family that every month, on the first and second days of your period, you will get a little more rest. For example, you could ask your husband or your mother-in-law to take your child downstairs to play, so that you can "out of sight, out of mind." If you want to watch a little TV, you could do that too.

She has the option of reading for a while if she wishes, preparing a cup of tea if she feels like it, and tidying up her space and that of her child if she wants to.

I also took the opportunity to explain to my baby that her mother was feeling a bit under the weather these past few days, with some discomfort in her back and waist, and that she needed to rest. Although my child was still quite young and didn't fully comprehend, I felt it was important to communicate this to her so that she would develop an early awareness of being considerate of her mother.

While it may only be a brief hour, it can feel like an entire hour of being yourself, which is very satisfying.

Perhaps you could discuss with your family your own respite time, taking into account your physical condition and specific time arrangements. It might also be helpful to explain that your physical condition needs to be adjusted. If you are frequently unwell, it could be that your immune system is already compromised. I am sure that your family will understand.

If your financial situation allows, you might consider hiring a nanny or hourly worker to help you with the housework every day or a few days a week. You could also temporarily escape from it and do something you enjoy.

From my experience of supporting my family and child through physical challenges, I have gained a deeper appreciation for the role of money in our lives. Money can offer a range of possibilities, but it is not the only solution. Sometimes, if something can be solved with money, it is the easiest solution.

For instance, my child has been diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder. While it is not the most challenging aspect to seek out specialized care at an institution and invest significant financial resources in rehabilitative interventions, the most difficult part is that it requires a great deal of mental and physical effort to help the child to emerge from their own world. This effort cannot be replaced by money, nor can it be fulfilled by a teacher spending just an hour or two a day.

The child's experience has taught us to let go of many things, and we would like to share them with you. While money is important, we have found that health is even more so. We believe that as long as there is someone there, there is hope, there is a future, and your child will be loved.

If your physical and mental energy is limited, you might consider using money to solve the problem if it can be done that way. If not, you could spend the time and effort to do it yourself.

On Mother's Day, may we both strive to be the best mothers and daughters we can be, and also take care of ourselves.