Hello, question asker!
I am honored to be invited to answer this question. Since the questioner has already done some homework and understands some basic concepts and improvement methods of emotional intelligence, I will answer some of the questions you did not mention.
You must first understand IQ.
To understand emotional intelligence, you must first understand intelligence quotient.
IQ, or "intelligence quotient," is the typical method of studying psychology using the methods of natural science research, quantifying human intelligence. The research methods include "intelligence tests," as well as many other tests, such as the Binet-Simon Intelligence Scale, etc.
Once IQ was recognized, EQ was proposed reluctantly by analogy. It is popular, but IQ research has limitations that are even more obvious in EQ research. Emotions cannot be quantified, so we can only say that EQ is high or low.
Let's return to emotions.
Emotional intelligence first studies emotions. To understand emotional intelligence, we must return to the study of emotions.
Emotions are innate and instinctive psychological activities that occur unconsciously.
All mental activities are generated around people's "needs." The questioner has the need to improve their speaking ability and level in social situations, and this will generate a series of emotional experiences.
You should refer to a series of tests and scales that quantify emotions.
Know yourself.
Knowing yourself is the core of emotional intelligence. It means being aware of your inner self and controlling your emotions.
Knowing yourself is the only way to become the master of your own life, regulate your emotions, and express them in a timely and appropriate manner. This is the crucial stage of emotional intelligence management.
You can learn more about this in the "Emotional Management" course on the Yi Xinli platform.
[Make someone feel comfortable]
You must fully understand yourself before you can observe and feel the needs and emotional feelings of others.
The final step is also the most crucial step in improving emotional intelligence. In the most common terms, this means making others feel comfortable.
Psychologically speaking, this kind of "comfort" is about making others feel recognized, affirmed, praised, and subtly "hatted" in interpersonal relationships in terms of the psychological need for "acceptance and recognition."
I'm not sure if this analysis and explanation is helpful, but I'm sharing it anyway.


Comments
I've struggled with saying the wrong things at the wrong times too, and I believe improving emotional intelligence can really help. Emotional intelligence is about recognizing and understanding emotions in yourself and others and using this awareness to guide your thoughts and actions. It's like being able to read the room and react appropriately, which can greatly enhance personal and professional relationships.
Emotional intelligence isn't just a buzzword; it's a critical skill that involves empathy, selfregulation, motivation, and social skills. Psychologically, it's about being aware of one's own emotional states and the impact they have on our behavior and decisions. When we improve our EQ, we learn to navigate social complexities, lead change, and resolve conflicts.
Improving emotional intelligence starts with selfawareness. You need to be honest with yourself about how you respond to different situations and people. Once you recognize your patterns, you can start working on strategies to manage your reactions better. This might mean pausing before you speak or considering how your words might affect others.
From a psychological standpoint, emotional intelligence is also about resilience. It's okay not to be perfect all the time. What matters is learning from those moments when we do slip up. By reflecting on these experiences, we can grow and become more adept at handling similar situations in the future.
The 5W1H principle can indeed be applied here. For instance, who are you interacting with? What is the context of the situation? Where does this interaction take place? When does it happen? Why do you think you're reacting this way? And how can you adjust your response? Asking these questions can provide valuable insights into your emotional responses.