What is our cognitive function like? Is it distorted during the learning process? How to deal with it?

Hello.

Yesterday, I watched "The Surrender Experiment." The question you asked is the same as the author's initial realization that there are two forces within a person: "thoughts" (= ideas = consciousness = cognition) and "awareness" (= subconsciousness).

Our thoughts are shaped by our upbringing, education, and self-understanding. Take, for instance, a child who grows up in a family that uses criticism as a motivator. This child will unconsciously develop cognitive biases such as "if you're not good enough, you don't deserve to be loved," "only if you're good enough are you worthy of respect," and "if you don't succeed, you'll be looked down on."

It's unfair to blame parents for this. They were trying to encourage their children to succeed, but they lacked the skills to provide the right support. When children understand this, they'll see the bias. This self-awareness gives them the chance to understand themselves better and change for the better when they grow up. It's like the question you mentioned. It's time to face our subconscious biases and correct them. We can live better lives than our parents did.

You can't simply "think about it" and become aware of your cognitive biases. You have to confront the damage to your self-esteem and confidence caused by being looked down upon, misunderstood, or even vilified. It's a feeling of having your heart broken into pieces. Rebuilding is also about rearing yourself. It means becoming the parent of your inner child, facing your loneliness and helplessness, and overcoming your self-deprecation. It means confronting your thoughts and truly amending your perceptions. Only then can you gain a psychological experience different from that of being raised by your parents.

This process is difficult but worthwhile. Every life, regardless of worldly success, deserves to be cherished, loved, and respected. They also have the power to love others and treat the world well.

Hello, question asker!

From your description, I can tell you're confused. But you're also aware of what's going on and you're facing it head on.

You ask two questions. The first is how we learn to understand what people say.

My personal opinion is that this question is innate.

As embryos, we can perceive our mothers' emotions.

During our slow development, we can hear our mother and father and other people outside the womb talking. We also respond by turning over, so I am certain that this is an innate ability and not something that can be distorted by parents.

We can also learn and understand what others say slowly based on our living environment, the things we experience, and our physical development abilities.

The second question is whether parents can distort our understanding of language during the learning process. We must know what to do if this happens.

Parents are our first educators, and they play a vital role in our growth process.

Parents also have a profound impact on our future development. When parents are well-educated, it allows us to receive information from the outside world and communicate with the outside world in a positive and gentle manner.

If our parents did not provide us with a positive model of communication or if our parents' education of us was violent, accusatory, or demeaning, we may lack confidence and struggle to understand what others are saying, which hinders effective interpersonal communication.

I want to tell you that you are the expert in solving your own problems. All problems are resources. Based on your description, I can give you suggestions that will be helpful.

First of all, I want to tell you that now that we have grown up, we have the strength to change and adjust ourselves. We can adjust our state in time and maintain a positive attitude.

This will lay the foundation for us to change and improve ourselves.

Second, I strongly believe that you can. Find your own interests and hobbies, enhance your sense of inner strength, increase your sense of accomplishment, and become more confident in yourself.

This is how we can offset some of the effects we have previously experienced.

You have come here again with awareness, and you are already on the path to change. Believe in yourself. If you believe firmly in what kind of person you want to become, you will become that kind of person. Make progress every day, little by little, and you will become different over time.

If you lack the strength to adjust yourself, seek help from a counselor. Meanwhile, read more psychology books or learn about psychology-related knowledge to become more powerful and courageous internally. You will gain a relaxed and carefree life sooner.

Finally, I have one last piece of advice for you. Life will heal you if you are willing to be healed. You will find your own breakthrough as long as you don't give up.

Our parents' education process undoubtedly affects us, resulting in a perception that differs from the public's.

When I was young, my parents joked with me and said that if they had told me when I was young that my hands were my feet and my feet were my hands, then I would have become someone who had their hands and feet in the wrong places when I spoke to other people in the future.

This proves that our perceptions can be influenced by the educational process when we were young.

Another example is when I was young, my whole family would say the word "gagagu." Later, when I grew up and communicated with my classmates and lived under the same roof as my dormitory mates, I encountered this word during my interactions with others and realized that this word was not an official word or even a dialect. It was just hiccups, but it was something adults said to children when they were young.

This situation is a combination of the two.

Our perceptions are influenced by our parents.

Second, this influence will undoubtedly affect our basic perception. However, when we integrate into society, we will naturally and gradually form a shared perception with society.

Every city has its own dialect, which is a fixed perception brought by our parents. When we grow up and enter the community, we will use Mandarin to communicate and establish social relationships.

My parents called me a white-eyed wolf when I was young. I thought it was just a name or nickname. I didn't realize it was an insult until I grew up and learned about it through social interactions and friends' online knowledge.

This is a cognitive distortion that my parents gave me. Even now, I know that this word is indeed not a good word, but I still feel a different way about it than the public does. I will accept it and regard it as a neutral word, or even a positive word, relatively easily. Family influence does not completely interfere with my social process. I already know that it is not a good word. Although my perception does not completely regard it as a derogatory word, I am not stupid enough to say to someone else when communicating with them that they are a white-eyed wolf. I know that this is not a nice word in the public perception. When I want to establish a friendly relationship with the other person, I will not communicate using such a derogatory word in the public sense.

To bridge the cognitive gaps created by parents or even distortions of the matter, we must absorb more diverse knowledge. We cannot reject information from the outside world. We must listen to these opinions and receive different information.

Next, we must improve our cognitive concepts. This concept is a combination of the two, and thinking is carried out. We may not know if our parents are always right, but we also know they are not always wrong.

At last, self-awareness emerges. When we combine laws and regulations, public order and good customs, and a comprehensive public mindset, we create an independent self.

A parent who teaches a child that it is okay to hit people and kill people is effectively teaching the child that these things are not wrong. The child will therefore not have this concept and will consider these things to be acceptable.

When he grows up and integrates into society, he will hit people and use violence. Others will say that hitting people is wrong and killing people is wrong. This will cause him to have a cognitive conflict.

He must not blindly believe that what his parents say is always correct, nor can he blindly believe that what others tell him is always correct. (Because if, on the contrary, his parents teach him that it is not okay to hit or kill people, but he is told by others that it is okay to hit or kill people,

In this situation, you must think for yourself and not blindly follow one side's opinions.

He must explore the world and society to understand why this is allowed and why it is not.

He will come up with his own answers by understanding issues such as laws and regulations and moral constraints.

For example, he must obey the law, respect the rights and interests of others, not use violence, and not take other people's lives. However, if his identity is professional, he may kill the enemy or a right given to him by the law, or act in self-defense and self-protection in case of danger.

He will simultaneously refute these two kinds of statements: it is not impossible to hit and kill people, and it is not necessarily possible to hit and kill people. He needs to have his own judgment to deal with the things he encounters in his daily life and his own perceptions of the world.

Our cognitive formation is a complex system that influences each other, but not absolutely. To improve our cognition and integrate into society, we must absorb, think, introspect, and grow constantly.

Hello! I really hope my answer is helpful for you.

There are three ways we can understand how we learn to understand others:

1. Children's social referencing

To study how babies and young children learn to understand depth, psychologists once did a famous experiment called the visual cliff experiment.

When an infant crawls across a transparent glass plate, they get to a point where they just stop and think for a moment. They've developed depth perception and they're aware that going further could mean they're stepping onto a cliff! Looking through the glass, there's a clear drop into the checkered cloth below.

This experiment was originally designed to study how babies learn to perceive depth. But the researchers made an interesting discovery! When a baby hesitated, if their mom stood opposite and smiled, encouraging them to crawl forward, the baby would keep going. But if the mom looked scared, the baby would stop.

In other words, when an infant is faced with a situation that is unfamiliar or uncertain, they will make a decision by referencing the nonverbal expressions of an important caregiver. This is the phenomenon of "social referencing," which is a really fascinating process!

It's so easy to see how parents' nonverbal expressions and underlying attitudes can affect their children, especially when the children are young and still need guidance from adults. It's amazing how parents' views and reactions to the world are passed on to their children in such a natural way!

2. Bandura's social learning theory

The wonderful psychologist Bandura believes that human behavior, especially the really complex stuff, is mainly learned. How we learn behavior is affected by both our genes and our bodies, as well as by the things we experience in our environment.

It's so interesting how our biology and our experiences shape our behavior. It's like they're two sides of the same coin! It's hard to separate the two, isn't it?

Bandura believes that there are two different ways we can learn new behaviors. One is through direct experience, which is when we actually do the behavior and see the result. Bandura calls this "learning through the consequences of the response," which is what we call direct experience learning.

There's another way to learn new behaviors, too! It's through observing the behaviors of others. Bandura calls this "learning through demonstration," which we call indirect experience learning.

Bandura's social learning theory is all about observational learning or imitation learning. During observational learning, people pick up on symbolic representations of exemplary activities and learn how to act in the appropriate way.

As the people with whom children spend the most time, parents become the focus of their observation and imitative learning. This influence is everywhere and subtle, and it's so important!

One day, my husband was eating and the paper napkin was too far away, so he used the chopsticks that had picked up the food to get one. When my son saw this, he became very excited and immediately used the chopsticks to pick up the paper napkin too. My husband saw this and became a little angry, saying that he couldn't do that, but my son immediately retorted, "Why can you do it, but I can't?"

Since then, my husband has been really mindful of his behavior, because he knows his little guy is always watching and learning from him.

3. Mirror Neurons

Have you heard about mirror neurons? They're a really interesting topic in cognitive neuroscience right now!

Mirror neurons are a really interesting topic in cognitive neuroscience that lots of people are studying right now!

In recent years, scientists have made an amazing discovery! They found that there are special cells in our brains called mirror neurons. While we used to think that the neuronal networks in our brains were where specific memories were stored, we now know that groups of mirror neurons actually store the encoding of specific behavior patterns.

Isn't it amazing how our brains work? They allow us to perform basic movements without even thinking about it. And they also help us to imitate the same movements when we see someone else doing them.

Traditional phenomenological philosophers have long argued that in order to truly understand something, one must experience it for oneself. And it's so true! For neuroscientists, the discovery of the mirror neuron system provides a material basis for this idea and has significantly changed our understanding of the way humans understand.

Thanks to the existence of mirror neurons, humans can learn new knowledge and interact with others in a truly amazing way! Our cognitive abilities and ability to imitate are based on the functions of mirror neurons, which are truly incredible. The mirror neurons that exist in the human brain are characterized by visual thinking and an intuitive nature, which is of great significance for understanding the origin of human thinking ability and the evolution of human culture.

Mirror neurons might just be the key to understanding how we learn from each other and copy each other's actions. They could be the glue that holds us all together!

Mirror neurons are found in the brains of both monkeys and humans. They are activated whenever we make a movement ourselves or see someone else make the same movement. Isn't it fascinating how this may be the basis of our ability to understand the behavior of others?

If the entire mirror neuron system is disrupted, it can have a huge impact on our lives. It can even make it so that we can't respond to things around us.

When it comes to the family, parents are the children's first teachers and also act as a mirror for them. In a family, the parents' every move and action influences the children at all times. Every corner of the home "talks" and is in constant "communication" with the children.

The wonderful theory of mirror neurons tells us that the best education is teaching that makes knowledge "visible." In other words, it's "teaching by example."

So, it's not just language that helps us understand what others say. In psychology, there's a helpful rule called the 55 38 7 rule. This means that 55% + 38% + 7% = 100%. 55% is about attitude, including actions and expressions. 38% is about tone of voice when speaking. And 7% is about the content of what is said.

It's so interesting how our communication with others is influenced by so many different factors! Did you know that our attitude, body language, facial expressions, and appearance can affect how effectively we communicate, accounting for up to 55% of the message we convey? And our tone of voice and the content of what we say account for only 7% each!

So, it's totally normal for parents to distort our understanding of language. That's what makes communication so interesting! It's not just about language. It's also about body language, facial expressions, tone of voice, and attitude. And it's so great when we can express our needs and feelings directly through language. But there's also a lot to be said for the other forms of communication too!

As we get older, it can be tough for parents to understand our "language." This is why there's often a gradual generation gap between generations. Even though we learned everything from them when we were young, we eventually become independent and separate from them. It can also be challenging for us to make them understand us all the time. But true independence is actually our ability to understand ourselves. When we can understand and accept ourselves, even if our parents misunderstand us, and even if these misunderstandings can't be fixed through communication, we can still stay calm. Then, such a stable inner you will become a stable support for your parents in the future, giving them a sense of security when they grow old, just as they gave us when we were young.

I hope this is helpful for you! Wishing you all the best!

Dear Question Asker, I am Baili Yina, the answerer to your question. I hope my reply provides you with the assistance you require.

The questioner revealed that, in the process of learning to read the other person's expression, their parents distorted their understanding of language. What is the recommended course of action in this situation?

[Situation analysis]

Each of us has our own perceptions, whether of the world, friends, parents, or even ourselves. It is rare for two people to perceive the same thing in the same way. Our perceptions of ourselves are influenced by factors such as our respective levels of education, upbringing, and life experiences, which can result in differences in perception.

The questioner appears to be developing a deeper comprehension of verbal communication. What are the underlying motivations for pursuing this objective? Is it to enhance integration within the social fabric, to expand one's network of acquaintances, or merely to refine a personal skill set, or to facilitate more effective communication and interaction with family members?

Different learning objectives result in different interpretations of what others are saying. For instance, a sentence from a superior and a sentence from a family member may have entirely distinct meanings and serve entirely different purposes. The same sentence, when uttered by a superior, may signify "You're doing a good job," with the underlying implication or hope that you will maintain the current status quo. When said by a family member, it may signify "You're doing a good job," which is more likely to be a comment of pride and joy for seeing your hard work pay off.

The example I provided is intended to prompt the questioner to consider why the boss and family members are saying the same thing but have different interpretations. Is this a misunderstanding on my part? Without a detailed description, I am unable to ascertain the nature of the confusion the questioner is experiencing regarding his parents' influence on his language comprehension.

It appears that the questioner is seeking guidance on how to address instances where family members may inadvertently distort the meaning and ideas that the questioner understands.

It is inevitable that we will form our own thoughts and interpretations when we encounter problems or hear what others say, whether they are family members or friends. When there are disagreements or inconsistencies, it is essential to communicate and exchange ideas with each other to reach a mutually acceptable solution.

I am unsure if you have communicated and expressed your understanding to your parents, as well as your disapproval of their understanding. If you have done so and they still insist on their own understanding, it can lead to discomfort on both sides, as the other person does not approve of our views or our expression of them. What is the best way to handle this?

Please consider how you would respond if a stranger challenged your ideas and opinions. Would you feel as strongly as you do now?

How would you respond if a stranger failed to comprehend your message? In most cases, you would likely choose to disregard that individual.

It is important to recognize that there are many individuals in the world with diverse perspectives, ideas, and opinions. Even individuals with admirable qualities like saints are not always understood or agreed with. Therefore, it is essential to accept that our parents may not always align with our views, and this should not be a source of frustration.

It is not always necessary for parents to agree with their children's views and ideas. When they are unable to do so, it is important to identify the source of the resulting pain.

Are we acting in the capacity of parents or in our own capacity?

It is important to recognise that expectations of parents and children can differ significantly. This can lead to varying levels of understanding between the two parties. It is not always the case that parents do not want to understand their children; rather, they may lack the necessary cognitive abilities to do so. It is also important to acknowledge that everyone is subject to limitations and cannot acquire the same cognitive abilities. This is not something that can be changed overnight.

[Recommended methods to try]

1. You have inquired about the best way to understand what other people say, including understanding the same sentence said by different people, and why the other person said it that way. Is it because the other person doesn't want to express themselves better, or is it because their ability limits them from expressing themselves better? I believe all of these are part of understanding what other people say. You are actually encountering a part of the learning process that makes you feel uncomfortable. How to resolve this discomfort is itself a kind of learning.

2. Can parents distort our understanding of language? It is possible that parents may not fully comprehend the nuances of language in the same way as their children. Therefore, it is to be expected that there may be occasional discrepancies in understanding. What is important is to determine the best course of action in such instances. If one is willing to accept that there may be limitations in a parent's ability to fully grasp their child's perspective, then it is essential to focus on ways to bridge this gap.

If you believe that your parents can recognize you, you should consider which communication method would be most effective in achieving your desired outcome. This will enable you to understand each other better through continuous communication.

I hope these methods will prove useful to you.

Please be aware that change takes time and patience. There is no need to worry or be afraid. Many people are experiencing or have experienced similar problems.

You have my support and that of the wider organization. I hope we can find a solution to the problem you're facing soon and that you're able to find a way forward that works for you.

I would like to express my gratitude to those who have liked and responded to my messages. I wish you peace and joy.

Simply put, cognition is the amazing ability to learn and apply knowledge!

From a professional perspective, cognition is an amazing process! It starts with the brain receiving external information, then it processes it through certain processes, transforms it into internal mental activity, and finally, it acquires and applies knowledge.

Feeling, perception, memory, imagination, and thinking are the amazing carriers and tools of cognition! The process of cognition is realized through these carriers and tools, and the result of cognition is produced.

In psychology, cognition is often contrasted with emotion and will, which makes for an exciting area of study!

Knowledge (i.e., cognition), emotion (i.e., emotion), and intention (i.e., will) are the three basic forms of human mental activity. And psychology has a fascinating way of positioning these three!

#01, Perception: This is where it all begins! It's a person's feelings, awareness, and representations of objective things.

#02, emotion: the incredible experience of your attitude towards whether or not objective things meet your needs!

#03, Will: The incredible psychological activity of consciously regulating actions according to one's own wishes in order to overcome difficulties and achieve a predetermined goal!

For the average person, the three are in perfect harmony. When there is a discrepancy between knowledge and intention, it presents an opportunity for growth and understanding. While it may lead to some challenges, it also paves the way for personal development and the discovery of new insights.

The fascinating journey of how we humans understand the world can be broken down into three incredible stages:

#01, Cognitive stage: This is where the magic happens! It's time to dive deep and explore the fascinating world of "what" and "what facts."

In other words, you get to understand what something is before you can gain an in-depth understanding of it in other respects!

#02, Evaluation stage: This is where the magic happens! It's time to ask ourselves: "What's the use?" or "What's the value?"

Once you understand these, you'll be ready to take the right measures to deal with them!

#03, Will (or decision-making) stage: This is where the magic happens! The aim is to solve the problem of "what to do" or "what behavior to implement."

People are amazing! They choose the most appropriate behavior in response to the quality characteristics of things and their value to the individual. This allows them to make full and effective use of the value characteristics of things.

It's amazing to see how our thoughts and emotions are connected! Without the right kind of thinking, our emotions can lead us down the wrong path. It's clear that our cognitive abilities play a huge role in our lives, and understanding how they work can help us make positive changes.

I'm excited to share that many people's psychological problems are related to their cognition to varying degrees. This is one of the reasons why cognitive therapy is so widely used and highly effective in solving problems!

A person's cognitive abilities, individual personality traits, and the environment they are in are all connected in a fascinating way. Individual personality traits are shaped by a unique combination of genetic inheritance and environmental influences.

The most important stage of the acquired environment is before adulthood—and it's a fascinating time!

So, the family of origin plays a really important role in how a person develops their cognitive abilities, which also answers your question! And to a certain extent, the parenting style has a profound impact on a child's cognition.

The great news is that lower cognition rarely causes psychological problems!

Absolutely! Narrow-minded or even distorted cognition will definitely cause psychological problems to a certain extent.

But here's the good news! Before adulthood, before fully entering society and leaving their parents behind, it is difficult for an individual to realize that their perception is off, or that there is a problem.

And then, when he finally enters university or starts working, he realizes that he is out of place among those around him. This is when the magic begins!

He will feel that his inner confusion will bring him negative emotions such as depression, anxiety, irritability, frustration, helplessness, confusion, and loss. But don't worry! He can take control and start exploring self-help or seeking help.

The great news is that the prognosis for some psychological problems caused by cognitive distortions is relatively good with the guidance and intervention of mental health professionals.

So, there's really no need to worry too much!

Hello, I'm Jokerev. I wonder if you might be interested to know that the process of learning to understand what other people are saying is actually quite a magical and natural one?

From the moment we are born, we are like sponges, absorbing information from our surroundings at all times. Language learning begins with imitation and repetition, initially the speech, intonation, facial expressions, and body movements of parents or primary caregivers.

Through ongoing interaction and feedback, we gradually gain insight into the meaning of these sounds and behaviors, which serves as the foundation for learning to "understand" what others are saying.

It is important to recognise the significant role that parents play in our language learning process. Their expressions, communication styles and attitudes towards our feedback can all have a profound impact on our understanding and use of language. If parents inadvertently mislead or distort communication, for instance by misunderstanding our intentions or using inaccurate words, it may result in a certain degree of bias in our perception of certain words or concepts.

It is important to remember that the human learning process is self-correcting and adaptive. Even if there are some misunderstandings at first, as we grow older, we can gradually adjust and improve our understanding and expression through schooling, social interactions, and self-reflection.

If you find that some of your parents' expressions may be confusing for you to understand, there is no need to be overly anxious. It is a natural part of growing up to encounter various challenges, and we can take steps to navigate these together. For instance, we can explore, learn, and clarify doubts on our own initiative. This could include reading, communicating with more people, and even asking your parents about your doubts when the time is right. In this way, we can discuss the correct understanding and expression together.

In conclusion, I would like to suggest that regardless of our past experiences, it is essential to cultivate the ability and opportunity to deepen our understanding of the world, to listen to others more effectively, and to express ourselves more clearly. This is not only about language learning, but also part of a broader philosophy of life that encourages us to keep learning, to keep understanding, to keep growing, and ultimately to find a way to live in harmony with the world.

Hello.

Humans learn language during infancy and childhood through interaction with the environment. The brain acquires language rules through imitation and repeated practice, gradually building a grammar and vocabulary system.

As we age, we expand and consolidate our language skills through reading, writing, and socializing.

The learning process will be distorted if the learning environment and teaching methods are not appropriate. Parents and educators must provide the correct language input and guidance for children to understand and use language correctly.

However, if the teaching methods are inappropriate or the language environment is poor, the child's language learning will undoubtedly be affected, leading to distortions in language comprehension or expression.

If a child is found to have a distorted understanding of language during the learning process, parents and educators must take measures to correct it. This may include providing more language input, using correct grammar and vocabulary, encouraging the child to read and write more, etc.

It is also crucial to refrain from undue interference in the child's language learning process and to ensure they have ample opportunity to explore and express themselves.

In short, cognitive function development is closely tied to the learning process. A good education and stimulating environment are key to fostering cognitive and language skills. Timely corrective measures are also essential when problems arise.

Dear Questioner, My name is Peilü.

Let me extend a welcoming gesture to you first.

Cognitive processes

Data interpretation

The questioner questions the cognitive process and function of individuals and also expresses doubt and concern about the potential influence of parents on individuals' understanding of language during the learning process. From the question posed, it is evident that the questioner is a thoughtful individual. What event has prompted this line of inquiry?

I am pleased to have this opportunity to discuss this topic with you.

Reason analysis

Cognition

In essence, cognition is the process of acquiring and applying knowledge. With the advent of information technology, there has been a shift in how cognition is perceived. From an information processing standpoint, cognitive ability can be defined as the capacity of the human brain to encode, store, extract, and apply objective information from the external environment.

The human brain receives external information through the perceptual system and then processes it through processes such as memory and thinking. This information is then outputted through the response system after decision-making and supervision.

Language

Language is a highly structured symbolic system that includes the spoken language we use in daily communication, as well as other forms of communication such as written and signed languages. The level of learning and mastery of language will vary depending on the individual's stage of physical development.

It is generally accepted that babies can recognize speech at around four to five months of age. Toddlers can say simple single-word phrases at around one year of age, and they can use simple sentences at around three years of age. It is also widely acknowledged that they can gradually master comprehension of discourse through learning.

The following factors may influence the outcome:

As you mentioned, the most immediate language environment we encounter is that of our family, so parenting can indeed impact our understanding of language. However, in addition to family parenting, many scholars also believe that genes influence the process of language learning. For instance, Chomsky's "universal grammar" suggests that the acquisition of our language is akin to having a grammar system pre-installed in the mind, which only needs to be activated by the external world to be utilized.

It is evident that genetics and acquired experience can have a combined effect on language learning.

— Personal advice —

Through a brief discussion, we can gain insight into some aspects of cognition and language learning. One question that arises is whether our parents can distort our understanding of language during our learning process. If so, what steps should we take?

"I believe your concern is whether our parents have the ability to distort our perceptions. Can true understanding be achieved through communication between people? Is the world as we know it the true face of reality? I don't think you need to worry too much about this point of view. Perhaps parents do have some influence on us, but we can also accept different experiences and feedback at various stages of our lives in the future. These experiences will help you reshape your perceptions. Past experiences may be replaced by new ideas, and some ideas may also reach compatibility or balance.

This necessitates maintaining an open and tolerant mindset, continuously learning, thinking, and summarizing; attentively listening, carefully inquiring, and, at the same time, effectively and clearly expressing our ideas when communicating with others, and promptly addressing any misunderstandings. Language is merely a means of communication, and observing the other person's facial expressions and body language can also assist in understanding their state.

We trust that the above responses will prove to be of assistance.

Thank you for your inquiry.

I would like to take this opportunity to extend my personal regards to you and the world at large.

Hello, I've received your question and I'm happy to help. I'm ZQ, a heart exploration coach on the Yi Xinli platform. It's great to see you're interested in our cognitive functions and whether cognition can be distorted during the learning process. Cognitive functions include perception, attention, thinking, memory, and language.

Perception is how we take in all the objects around us. Attention is the range of things we can focus on at once. A mental state is memory, which is all the memories we've stored in our minds. Language is what we say every day and our own language system.

Around age three is when we really start to pick up languages quickly. We're influenced by body language, physical props, body movements, and some subconscious daily influences, and we start to understand what others are saying and learn to speak.

It's also worth noting that parents can sometimes influence our understanding of language. After all, they're our first teachers. What they say seems to us as a golden rule and a sacred decree in childhood. They can guide you on how to understand the world, how to understand other people's words, and what kind of emotions to generate.

Our parents can have a big impact on us. For instance, if someone on the street gives you a dirty look, your parents might say that the other person was rude. Some people might say a swear word in return. Then your parents might say that you shouldn't learn from that person because their behavior is unacceptable.

If your parents had a different take, like saying it's just a swear word, then it's fair to say we all say it.

Then things might change. Different parents have different approaches to child education. You can also think about the kind of influence you've received during your interactions with your parents. If there are any negative influences, you can record them in a diary.

We can take a closer look at what you need to focus on. Then we can examine how our cognitive functions develop over time. According to Piaget's theory, our cognitive development typically occurs in four stages: the perceptual-motor stage, the pre-operational stage, the concrete operational stage, and the formal operational stage.

Each stage represents a different age group. For example, at the initial perceptual-motor stage (0 to 1.5 years old), we usually think that external things exist permanently around us and feel like everything revolves around us.

How we perceive things is actually based on our feelings and actions. Then, when we are about six years old, we may still think that many objects in the world have a soul and that we are still a bit egocentric and irreversible.

Once we hit six, we start to grasp the idea of conservation. This means that some things will still be there even if they're taken away. We can also start to think in reversible ways. Over time, we'll move away from thinking only about ourselves and start to consider others. By the time we hit 12, we'll be pretty mature.

As we get older and our thinking becomes more abstract and dialectical, it becomes harder for others to control us. Look at what you've experienced during your cognitive development and at what age you may be more susceptible to your parents' influence.

We can look at it this way: before the age of six, it's more likely to be influenced by parents and external factors. At that time, we were also naive and romantic, believing that the world was so beautiful that all objects could communicate with us, and that everything was like a fairy tale with a soul.

If what your parents say affects your autonomy and initiative,

There's a good chance that you have low self-esteem and are afraid to explore the world. This is another psychological phenomenon that the other party needs to deal with. I suggest that you clearly explain some specific interactions or behavioral and value judgments between you and your parents. That way, your demands may be better addressed. If you encounter problems, I suggest that you seek psychological counseling to sort them out. Good luck!

ZQ?

The following represents a brief consideration of these two cognitive aspects.

Cognitive functions develop gradually through learning and experience, and the ability to understand what others say is one such basic function.

From infancy, humans are exposed to language and gradually develop a basic understanding of it through auditory perception.

We perceive sounds from our environment and gradually distinguish speech sounds.

Upon comprehension of a linguistic utterance, one may discern salient phonological characteristics, including the frequency of sounds, intonation, rhythm, and phonemes.

Furthermore, we learn to associate these sound characteristics with different languages.

Furthermore, through the process of learning, individuals can comprehend the meaning of language and the underlying grammatical rules.

The acquisition of vocabulary, grammar, and semantics enables the comprehension of the meaning of spoken language.

Furthermore, the comprehension of verbal communication entails the application of reasoning and contextual understanding.

Through experience, we can gain a deeper comprehension of the speaker's intentions and messages.

Language experience can be accumulated through a variety of means, including communication with others, reading, and watching media. These experiences facilitate the gradual improvement of one's ability to comprehend the speech of others.

Consequently, our comprehension of language is an incremental process that necessitates a substantial investment of time and experience.

It is not uncommon for children to experience some difficulties in understanding during the learning phase, as they are still in the process of gradually building and expanding their vocabulary and semantic knowledge.

Such difficulties may be transient and not indicative of deliberate distortion by the parents.

Nevertheless, it is possible that parents may distort the semantic understanding to a certain extent.

For example, parents may utilize simplified or modified vocabulary and linguistic structures to communicate with their children, particularly during the early infantile stage when the child's language abilities are still evolving.

As parents are the primary linguistic models for their children, children will imitate their parents' language habits and expressions.

Such practices may consequently impact the child's language development and auditory perception.

Furthermore, parents' personal views, prejudices, or cultural backgrounds may also impact the manner in which they convey semantic understanding to their children. Parents may select specific vocabulary, utilize particular expressions, or disregard certain semantic nuances to reflect their personal perspectives or intentions.

In this instance, the impact of parental distortion on semantic understanding may be deliberate, or it may also be unconscious.

In conclusion, although parents may occasionally distort their children's semantic understanding intentionally or unintentionally, this is typically a normal aspect of language development.

Nevertheless, in order to mitigate the potential adverse effects on the child, parents should endeavor to employ constructive measures in their responses.

It is of the utmost importance that parents utilize accurate and appropriate language when communicating with their children.

It is advisable to refrain from using vague or inaccurate terminology when describing concepts or phenomena, and to strive for clarity in one's discourse.

It is imperative that parents utilize the appropriate vocabulary and terminology to describe objects and concepts, and refrain from simplifying or modifying semantic information to ensure that children can gain a comprehensive and accurate understanding.

Furthermore, parents can facilitate their children's semantic understanding by encouraging them to engage in independent thinking and inquiry.

By responding to their queries and prompting them to consider diverse interpretations and perspectives, parents can facilitate the development of a more comprehensive and accurate semantic understanding.

In instances where children exhibit semantic misunderstandings or confusion, parents should promptly furnish them with accurate semantic information and clarifications.

Furthermore, parents can facilitate a diverse linguistic environment by engaging with their children through activities such as reading books, watching educational animations, and engaging in conversations and interactions.

Such exposure to diverse linguistic practices and semantic expressions facilitates the development of a more nuanced and precise semantic understanding.

Ultimately, when children utilize precise semantic expressions and demonstrate comprehension, parents should provide prompt and constructive feedback and encouragement.

Such an approach can enhance the child's focus on and comprehension of correct semantics, while also fostering enthusiasm for language learning.

It is my hope that this information will prove useful.

Good morning, my name is Xin Tan and I'm a coach working with Fei Yun. I believe that life is a beautiful journey, not just for appreciation, but also for personal growth and development.

I would be delighted to discuss with you the following two topics: how to understand others (communication) and whether parents have a negative influence on us (interference).

I believe that everyone's perception of the world is shaped by their own experiences.

Similarly, some people believe that all men are born evil, while others maintain that all men are born good. It could be said that an argument must arise from another argument, and that the argument itself is shaped by each individual's perception of the world. This perception may or may not align with the truth, but it is nevertheless a reflection of the individual's point of view.

It could be said that there is no absolute right or wrong, just different points of view, and points of view are not facts. This leads to the second point: the meaning of communication may be derived from the other person's response.

It is worth noting that the same sentence, "Have you eaten?" is interpreted by some as a Chinese greeting.

Some people may answer quite seriously. If the other person adds a polite remark like "long time no see, let's get together sometime," it's possible that the person will have some expectations.

I would like to respectfully propose that the influence of parents on our learning process is worthy of our attention.

It could be said that everyone comes from a family first and acquires some habits from their parents, which could be called "models."

It is often said that a son will mirror his father's actions and traits. Similarly, it is believed that a son will follow in his father's footsteps, which highlights the potential influence of a family environment.

It is important to recognize the role that parents play in their children's learning process. In the case of the advice "Don't play with bad kids," it is the parents who are making the judgment, not the child.

It might also be helpful to consider patterns like "You shouldn't do that..." and "You should do this..."

If parents are overly involved in their children's lives, it can hinder their ability to think and judge independently. Over time, this can lead to a loss of autonomy and a lack of agency in making their own choices.

It is also worth noting that parents can offer their children guidance and support in navigating life's challenges. Their life experiences and social insights can provide valuable insights and help children avoid potential pitfalls.

You brought up the topic of "distortions," so I will not go into further detail on that point.

How might we achieve transformation and escape negative influences?

Given that our life experiences shape our perception of the world, it stands to reason that this perception can evolve and change.

It could be said that the influence or interference of parents on their children is a way to change cognition, and learning through experience is also a way to change and break through.

It could be said that changing our perceptions also changes our emotional experiences and behavioral manifestations, which in turn stem from our own independent thinking and judgment.

People often learn and grow through a process of trial and error. This can help us to take back the initiative in our lives, learn from small mistakes at low cost, and achieve breakthroughs in our understanding.

"Growing Up for Life" has the potential to assist us in developing a growth mindset, transforming long-standing habits, and experiencing the benefits of a fulfilling life.

I hope these ideas are helpful to you. I wish you all the best in the world.

If you would like to continue the conversation, you are welcome to follow my personal page, "Heart Exploration Service."

Hello there, question asker!

Hi there! I read your question and I'm so happy you came here to ask it. It's totally normal to have different perceptions from our parents or friends. It can even make us feel a little confused or conflicted inside, which is a really unpleasant feeling. But it's also a great opportunity to learn and grow!

Your question made me think of the difference in perception between my mother and me. In my mother's world, meat just wasn't her thing. She grew up eating meat and it made her sick, so she always said, "I don't understand why other people find meat so delicious." Because my mother didn't eat meat, when I was little, we were poor and hardly ever ate meat. On New Year's Eve, my father would cook stewed pork dishes, but I didn't eat it either.

My younger brother and I, along with my mother, don't eat meat. My mother is especially amazing! If meat has been in the pot, she will wash it over and over again with boiling water and lye water, saying that she can't stand the smell. She rarely ate meat before I turned 30.

I remember that before I turned 30, there was a time when my family needed to stir-fry meat for a gathering with friends and family. I thought, "I'm old enough to argue about this," and I argued. The meat was overcooked and dark and hard. My mother didn't see me arguing, but she saw what I had done and said, "Oh my, what is this?" She put it in her mouth and couldn't taste the meat.

I'd say that my mother was a big influence on me in this way.

As I grew up, I was so happy to find that my mother's influence on me was gradually becoming less and less. I was able to eat meat more than before, which was a wonderful change. Up to now, I can say that I used to dislike meat in particular, but now I'm slowly learning how to make it taste good, and it's been such a joy to discover this new aspect of my taste preferences.

I'd like to show you through this change in my own perception that parents do affect our perceptions. It's true that our perceptions are influenced from a young age by the people around us, not only through words but also through actions. But when we were young, we didn't feel awkward and were in agreement with our parents.

When we disagree with our parents, it's actually a sign that we're growing and changing. If we can use a little wisdom and try not to have too many conflicts with our parents, our cognitive concepts will gradually become free from their influence and we'll have our own!

In this day and age, we have so many amazing resources at our fingertips! We can use these to share with our loved ones on WeChat. This is a great way to start a conversation and see if our ideas can blend with those of our parents.

And then, when it comes to understanding what other people are saying, I think this one should be given. It really depends on how familiar you are with the person's words. Isn't there a saying like this? People who understand each other's hearts know what the other person is going to say and do before they even open their mouths. If they are not familiar with each other, then they have to gradually accumulate experience. In that case, when we don't understand what other people are saying, we should be more tolerant. We should allow other people to have emotions, and we also have emotions, so we should learn to express emotions, not just the expression of emotions.

I have no doubt that you will be able to resolve the conflict with your parents' perceptions with your own wisdom and gradually establish your own perceptions. You are so clever and you've come here so actively to ask for help. I'm sure you'll be just fine!

I believe in you! You can do it. If it were your friend who encountered this situation, I know you would be able to help your friend succeed. You've got this! The world and I love you!

Hello, I'm Zeyu.

We will address the questioner's concerns by examining the issue in a straightforward and concise manner, with illustrative examples.

"What is our cognitive function?" Our cognitive function is the AI scan function of a mobile phone. It relies on the memory area of our brain to provide the driving force, while the cognitive function is responsible for scanning, recognition, and initial judgment.

If there are no physical problems or major educational deficits, our cognitive functions are basically sound. However, they can differ.

"Can the learning process be distorted?" It depends on two things: the experiences that are made when the cognitive system is being built and the kind of information that is received.

If we lack the ability to think independently and reflect on ourselves before the learning process, the result may be distorted. However, this distortion can be corrected. For example, we have seen and still see "public knowledge" before. The perception we once established may be "foreigners are really high-quality." With the popularization of the Internet and people's increasing access to information, we who are open-minded and look at the world have the opportunity to test the correctness of those "public knowledge statements" in the past, so that we can correct the distorted facts and perceptions. This is the distortion in the learning process.

"How do we learn to understand what other people are saying?" This involves the education we receive as infants and young children. There is a period of development in childhood when language learning occurs. It is easiest to learn phonetics at this time. We learn to understand what other people are saying by making connections and understanding things. Babies are taught simple words like "mommy" and "daddy" when they first learn to speak. Babies may not understand the word "mommy" or even know what it means, but they will connect the word with the person they see and form a memory. Then there are various "fruit animals" that gradually increase in difficulty until the child can speak and understand others smoothly. The continuous development of the brain plays a crucial role in this process.

"Can parents distort our understanding of language during the learning process, and if so, what should we do?" The answer is yes. Our understanding of language is clearly related to the region and even customs. If we want to reverse and re-understand the meaning, the most direct way is to find authoritative explanations from the region and the general public to first understand the meaning of the phonetic representation, and then try to re-understand the language and practice intensively.

It is crucial to understand that neither cognitive models nor language comprehension are fixed. They change and adapt according to changes in reality and our own experiences. The best course of action is to accept these changes and recognize the benefits they bring.

Hello! I'll give you a big hug.

Cognition is a big issue. Let's talk about what cognition is.

Cognition is a conscious activity. It's the process and result of how we process information about the world around us. It includes how we perceive things, make judgments, and summarize the laws of things (within a certain scope). Cognition includes our senses, perception, memory, thinking, imagination, language, etc.

The cognitive process is basically just a way of processing information.

First, we have to learn a common language. Second, we have to share a common culture. But everyone may understand the same sentence in the same situation differently.

This is what cognition is for.

The way we think is shaped by our environment and relationships. This includes the nurturing environment and educational environment we experience when we're young.

Relationships include those with caregivers, peers, and community members.

As we grow and learn, our parenting style, our parents' personalities, and the way they treat us all affect how we perceive things. The same goes for the parents you mentioned and how they influence our language skills, especially when we're young.

For instance, some kids pick up profanity from their parents or caregivers. They might not even know what those words mean, but they copy adults when they communicate in this way.

As kids enter society, like when they start kindergarten or primary school, they'll encounter people outside the family. They'll see that the family and society have different expectations and that what their parents give them is different from what society requires.

Cognition is like a filter that each of us carries. Everyone's filter is different and changes over time. For example, when you were a child, you thought something was unbearable, but years later, when you look back, you'll probably wonder why you couldn't let it go back then.

In a nutshell, our thoughts are shaped by what we've learned, our personal growth, and the influence of others.

A lot of the problems we face are basically caused by a clash between our own views and those of others, social norms, traditions, and mainstream culture.

But the good news is that cognition can be changed. Ellis's emotional ABC theory and cognitive behavioral therapy are both about changing people's cognition.

Unreasonable beliefs tend to have three main characteristics: they're absolute, they're overly generalized, and they have extremely bad outcomes.

The idea is that you can change how you think.

You can adjust your perceptions by being aware, thinking, reading, and reflecting. Here are some recommended books related to Ellis:

You can also speak with a counselor if you'd like.

I'm a counselor who's often Buddhist and sometimes pessimistic, but I try to stay positive.

Just wanted to check in and see how things are going.

Hello!

You're curious about how we learn to understand what others are saying, whether parents can influence our understanding of language during the learning process, and what we can do if this happens.

From a psychological perspective, a person's language development is inseparable from the parenting and environment in which they grow up. It's truly amazing how, through communication with parents or other caregivers, we imitate language, expressions, and gestures. From the first babbling to learning words and longer sentences, we develop through continuous learning. When we go to school, we start reading, meet people other than our parents, see more books, learn more, and our language develops more richly, such as the popular Internet slang. It's incredible to see how our language develops and changes as we grow up!

As parents, we play an important role in our children's language development. We can influence their understanding of language in many ways. For instance, if a child learns an expletive from watching TV and finds it novel and fun, they might say it often. However, if parents forbid the child from saying it or use harsh punishments, the child may develop a distorted understanding of the expletive. They might suppress their curiosity and think that what they say is bad.

Some children may become taciturn and obedient as a result. But there is also the opposite direction of development, which is just as exciting! They may use foul language, do what they are told not to do, and go against their parents.

So, when parents come across their kids using bad language, they can actually make a positive change! Instead of letting it bother them, they can help their kids understand the words they're using and why they're not so great.

Clarification is a great way to ask questions, understand, and communicate! Let's say a child hears a word and his understanding isn't quite on the same level as yours. You can check and clarify to strengthen communication and understanding and help him normalize the distorted language.

And the best part is that if the child has grown up, he can communicate with different people, learn to listen to others, learn to express himself, discover problems with his own language, and learn more languages by reading more books!

Wishing you the very best!

I believe that cognition is the result of the unity of subjectivity and objectivity, while distortion is the result of a lack of unity.

There are a number of stages involved in understanding what someone is saying. These include hearing it, hearing it in full, being able to understand it, and confirming it with each other. It is not always easy to get through all of these stages successfully.

The listening stage is an important one.

It is inevitable that words will run into your brain clearly and distinctly, whether you are listening to a teacher's lecture, your parents' nagging, or your peers' confidences. This is the foundation. At this stage, you may wish to pay attention to environmental noise, concentration, and so on. Similarly, when reading a book, you may wish to be careful to let the words and phrases enter your brain carefully.

I believe we are at the stage of understanding.

This may be what the original poster meant when he said that parents may "distort" our learning. It is undeniable that the family, as the "birthplace" of our life journey, plays a crucial role in orienting us. While it is true that parents may sometimes hold biased ideas, there are also many benefits. A wealth of life experience and basic guidance can provide invaluable support and protection.

Learning is a process of constantly shaping cognition. In the process of constantly enriching oneself, there will always be a lot of analysis of right and wrong, which can lead to the realization that parents may be mistaken and the opportunity to offer correction. No one is perfect, and one has to constantly accept opposites and then analyze and reverse them with rigorous theories.

I believe that mutual understanding is key.

I believe this is the most important thing. I used to have many conflicts and disagreements with my father, and at one point I even refused to speak to him out of anger. Although I still don't agree with some of his comments, I can understand his cognitive background. Through continuous learning, I can also constantly draw on the experiences of many famous people. In the end, I will say to him, "This is not what I said, it is written in 'xxx'. I understand you...you have worked hard too."

Ultimately, I hope the original poster will continue to embrace a questioning mindset and support their own knowledge with a growing understanding.

Hello! I'm happy you asked for help. I hope my sharing helps.

You want to know if your parents' words and your relationship with them will affect your thinking.

Our communication with our parents affects our thoughts. When you seek help, remember that you did not want to become like your parents when you were a child. As you grew up, you became more like them.

What do you think?

Stereotypes, love of the house, labeling, generalizing, selective attention, catastrophizing, procrastination, self-deprecation, self-negation, self-attack... These affect our understanding of ourselves and others, as well as relationships.

Some parents hide their true feelings from their children. This makes children question their feelings and hide their own feelings from others.

Some parents scold and beat their children, making them feel unwanted. But while doing this, they say they love their children. The children will agree with their parents and think the scolding and beating are love.

When we realize that our parents' actions and thoughts have affected us, we can change them through learning and growth.

So, when we face cognitive distortions formed during growth, we must confront and question them. We must also pay attention to our true feelings, especially when others make us feel uncomfortable. We must face our feelings and speak honestly, rather than denying or repressing them.

Read "Parents' Language," "Cognitive Awakening," and "Critical Thinking."

Hello, question asker! I'm Jiang 61.

First of all, thank you for trusting us enough to tell us your problem and get an answer. You asked, "What is our cognitive function like?"

Can the learning process be distorted? I'm not sure I understand what you mean by "what to do." Your question is written in a relatively simple way, which I find a bit puzzling. Let's try to explore it together.

1. Introduction

You said, "How do we learn to understand what others are saying? Can our parents mess up our understanding of language during the learning process? If so, what should we do?"

1⃣️, Misinterpretation

From what you said in your intro, it seems like you and your folks have had some pretty big communication issues. It sounds like your parents often get the wrong idea about what you're trying to say, which can make you feel pretty frustrated.

2⃣️, verify content

You think the communication barrier between you is due to cognitive problems. You also mentioned what you mean by "learning" in the learning process. Could you also elaborate on the distorted "language comprehension" so that we can better understand what you are trying to say?

3⃣️, Response

How do you handle misunderstandings and miscommunications with your parents? We'd like to talk about effective communication.

2. Discussion

1⃣️, What causes misunderstanding?

Cognition and cognitive processes

Cognition is one of the most basic things that happens in our brains. It's the process of acquiring knowledge, applying knowledge, or processing information. It includes things like senses, perception, memory, thinking, imagination, language, and so on.

The human brain takes in information from the outside world, processes it in the mind, and then uses it to govern human behavior. This is called the process of information processing, which is also called the cognitive process.

Cognitive differences

Cognitive differences can be seen as differences in how we gain knowledge, use it, or process information. Since cognition is a basic psychological process, everyone's cognition will differ due to various factors such as social environment, family environment, growth environment, and education level.

Your parents have different feelings, perceptions, memories, imaginations, and thoughts than you do because of their family upbringing, education, social environment, etc. If you talk about something profound or something they have not experienced, they cannot empathize with you and can only understand what you are saying based on your experiences and mental activities. It is easy to give you the impression of being poles apart, which is also the cause of misunderstandings.

2⃣️, Personality reasons

It's best not to make assumptions about your parents' personalities without knowing them well. Some people are just more focused on themselves and their opinions, which we call controlling and aggressive personalities.

The controlling personality

The controlling type wants to be respected, heard, and to have their own ideas respected too. Otherwise, they get angry. They don't listen to what others say or do. They demand that others do what they want, no questions asked. This is what we call a strong personality.

Radical personality

Some examples of radical personality traits are:

They're strong-willed, action-oriented, energetic, and achievement-oriented.

On the plus side, they're courageous and decisive, persevering, not afraid of difficulties, and highly self-disciplined.

On the downside, they can be short-tempered, lack empathy, and are stubborn, arrogant, and complacent.

Radical people don't think about things from other people's perspectives, get easily angry, and are arrogant. This makes it hard for them to listen to other people's ideas. They're also not easy to communicate with.

3. Empathy

Empathy

Empathy is a way of communicating that involves understanding what someone is feeling from their perspective and position objectively, and sharing that understanding with them.

Empathy is often described as "putting yourself in someone else's shoes." It means putting yourself in their position at the same time, place, and event.

The influence of the original family

Empathy is something you learn. If you grow up in a strong family environment where you feel misunderstood, it can be hard to empathize with others. This is often because of the way family life is experienced.

3. What to do

1. Accept the situation.

The way things are at the moment.

No matter the reason—differences in perception, personality, the influence of the original family, or differences in thinking—this is an objective reality that we can't change right now.

Just accept it.

We know that a lot of the things we think we know about why our parents act the way they do aren't actually the result of their own doing. They're the result of historical circumstances. There's no point in dwelling on them. We can feel a little more relaxed if we accept reality, look at our parents' actions with tolerance, and empathize with their thoughts.

2⃣️, Talk to the right person

Emotional communication

I imagine you want to have a way to express your emotions, so you communicate with your parents. However, you are disappointed that they don't understand.

It's important to communicate with the right people.

Emotional communication can be with people you trust, including parents, close friends, and counselors. If there are communication barriers with parents, you can find someone you trust to talk to, like a friend or counselor, to share how you're feeling and what you're going through, and get their support and understanding.

3⃣️ Effective Communication

Effective communication

Communication is basically the exchange of information. It's the whole process of sharing a message with someone and hoping they'll respond the way you want. If you get a positive response, you've effectively communicated.

Communication includes both verbal and non-verbal messages, with the non-verbal part often being more important than the verbal part. Being able to communicate effectively is really important when it comes to dealing with other people and complex social relationships on campus.

Here are the steps to effective communication:

There are four steps to effective communication:

The first step is to express your feelings, not your emotions.

Step 2: State your needs, not your frustrations. Let them know you're upset, not that you're about to unleash your anger.

Step 3: State your needs, not your complaints. Don't leave the other person guessing what you want.

Step 4: State your desired outcome, not your current situation. Focus on the end result, not the immediate event.

When we communicate effectively, there's still a chance that our parents won't understand us or get the wrong idea. There's no need to worry. We can repeat what they say to make sure we understand, or use a different language that they can understand. If that doesn't work, we can also choose to give up and find friends to communicate with.

Questioner, the point of communication is to let it all out, gain understanding, and feel at ease. There's no need to limit it to just our parents. As long as we achieve what we're looking for, who we communicate with is up to us.

I wish the original poster all the best for the future!