What kind of mindset does he have regarding the topic of breakup?

The age difference between you and your boyfriend is nine years, yet he displays a lack of maturity and an inability to provide the care and support you require. During disagreements, he resorts to either cold violence or an endless series of arguments, necessitating your intervention to provide comfort. At this juncture, you have reached a point of no compromise.

You have experienced the pain and suffering caused by the other person. Despite your decision not to compromise and sever all contact, you still seek to comprehend the other person's mentality and the rationale behind their actions. Indeed, given that you have reconciled on previous occasions, you could have engaged in direct communication with the other person to gain insight into their perspective.

It appears that no further communication has occurred regarding this matter, which may give rise to concerns that further disagreements may ensue.

In an intimate relationship, both parties must endeavor to maintain the relationship. However, when there is a disagreement, it is also crucial for the two people to choose how to address it and whether they have the capacity to communicate and address the issue together. If one party is consistently making sacrifices and compromises, they may experience feelings of exhaustion and sadness.

Now that a decision to terminate the relationship has been made, it is advisable to move on. Should an investigation of the other person's mentality be desired, the information provided is insufficient for analysis. It is possible that the other person does not possess sufficient love for the subject, or that they exhibit an avoidant attachment style. However, these traits are not amenable to change through individual effort.

It is only through the dissolution of an inappropriate relationship that one can hope to meet a more suitable partner. I wish you well in your future endeavours.

Hello, I'm Strawberry!

I see your confessions and grievances, and I'm here to support you! Your boyfriend is nine years older than you, and under normal circumstances, his thinking will be more mature. In your relationship, he should be able to find a way to get along with you. But from your description, your boyfriend sends you messages to scold you, and every time you argue, he uses cold violence or gets extremely angry.

From this behavior, we can see that he's not willing to give in to you first. Perhaps he thinks that if he gives in first, he'll lose a certain position in the relationship. His style of dealing with things is closely related to the people he's come into contact with during his growth process. If he doesn't know his own problems, he won't take the initiative to ease the relationship.

Oh my goodness, can you believe it? The questioner has directly cut off all contact this time because he can't stand the way you two are getting along! This method has been used by the questioner's boyfriend before. I want to ask the questioner, when your boyfriend does this, what kind of mood are you in? Can this approach solve your problems?

It's so interesting how we can imitate each other's behaviors! It's like his behavior is affecting you. You know full well that what he is doing is wrong, but in an invisible way, you also want to treat him in this way to see if he will realize his own problem and come back to you.

In this relationship, your boyfriend seems to care more about his own feelings, which is great! It can be said that he was previously spoiled, which has caused him to be more self-centered. So your mode of getting along with each other says it all. Although you are nine years younger than him, when conflicts arise, you are the one who has to comfort him more, which is a great opportunity for you to show him how much you care!

In a family group, his parents are messaging him, but he's not replying. It's been going on for a week. What's his mentality?

Oh my goodness, because of the argument with you this time, you deleted his contact information! In the process, we don't know if he contacted you, but from your previous interactions, the chances are higher that he is waiting for you to coax him back. His parents sent him a message in the group. What was the message?

Maybe his parents can tell from his behavior that you two are having a bit of a disagreement, but they're too shy to ask you directly, so they posted a message in the group to get you two talking again! Your boyfriend isn't replying, but I bet he's just waiting for you to say something first.

1. Take all the time you need to make the best decision for you!

From what the questioner has shared, it seems that they are really struggling to let this relationship go. They want to use this method to prove whether their boyfriend cares about them and whether he will take the initiative to win them back. They are testing his attitude to see if it will change.

But this will not solve the problem. If you still cherish this relationship, the two of you need to communicate well. If you have always been the one to give more in this relationship, this scenario will just keep repeating itself. But you can change it! When you break down, you can choose to explode or to take control. After the explosion, you can be the one to comfort him.

It's time to decide: do you want to continue or separate? Either way, take some time to think about what you really want.

2. Absolutely! You can totally change the way you get along!

From the text, it's not clear who started each argument or which side is in the wrong. But don't worry! From the way you handle things, it seems that the way you get along in this relationship is unhealthy. The good news is that you can change it! Have you communicated in the past to change this way of getting along? If not, no problem! Even if you get back together this time, you can still work on this together.

3. Learn together and change together!

There are more problems in your relationship, and they cannot be changed with a few words. But don't worry! If you still choose each other, then discuss and agree to learn about the relevant knowledge together, see the problems in yourself from it, and change them accordingly. I believe that through learning, you can find a suitable way to get along with each other.

Every relationship is worth managing with care! Do what you will not regret. If you are happy, then it was worth it! I hope the questioner can find the answer within himself soon, and I wish him the best!

Hello! I'm not sure what the specific reason for your quarrel is, but I can tell you're feeling pretty unhappy about the other person's behavior of swearing at you, quarreling, and cold violence in your relationship.

After an argument, you also make your own way to reconcile and connect with the other person, trying to repair the relationship through communication and exchanges. You are excited to see if the other person will adopt the same attitude towards you.

Deep down, you're really hoping that the other person will also use the same calm approach to handle and resolve the emotional relationship between the two of you!

From what you've told me, it seems like the other person is avoiding news from his family and you. It's unclear why, but I'm sure there's a good reason! It's impossible to know the exact state of mind of the other person because the specific details of the quarrel are not known.

It's a great idea to wait until the other person calms down before discussing the matter. You never know, if you wait for a while, he might just handle your relationship better! And if you are dissatisfied with the other person's previous attitude towards your relationship, you can express your feelings of being misunderstood and saddened by his avoidance of communication.

Sometimes a person's age doesn't reflect their psychological maturity or maturity in dealing with people. If the way he talks makes you uncomfortable and he swears, you have the power to stop the conversation or communicate in a calmer tone.

Arguing and shouting at each other is a surefire way to hurt feelings and make it more difficult to resolve problems.