Why are people in the workplace so cold and selfish?

Hello, host!

I'm here to help! I'd love to hear your feedback. Let me fly!

The host said that he felt that in the workplace, people seemed to be more selfish and cold. Well, this made the host feel very uncomfortable. Well, here's the good news!

I want to give the host a big hug from afar!

The original poster actually mentioned the issue of adaptation, which is totally normal! It can be seen that the original poster is probably new to the workplace, but that's okay! You will also find that not everyone is actually cold, and that's great!

What I want to say to the original poster here is that it's all about expectations! We say that in different social roles, society has different expectations of us. As a member of the workforce, society expects you to be able to complete your tasks or work to a high standard or even beyond what is required.

You don't have to be a helpful person, but you can choose to be!

In this era of rapid change, we know that everyone is very busy, and our colleagues are not obliged to help us. But when everyone completes their own work, the company's overall business will progress!

What I want to say is that if the host feels that there are some shortcomings in his abilities in the workplace, he can absolutely solve them himself! For example, he can take online training. In short, in this era of the Internet of Everything, we can actually solve our own problems on our own, except that it is a bit difficult at the beginning.

If your whole life is about work, it might get a bit dull. So I hope you can find some time to develop your interests and hobbies and make some friends outside of work!

In short, work-life balance is a bit more. Don't expect to be taken care of at work; it's okay in life and among friends. After adjusting your mindset, our lives will be a bit better—and better is on its way!

I really hope this helps! I'd absolutely love to get your feedback, attention, and likes!

Dear question asker, I would like to commend you for your perceptive analysis of the workplace. It is not easy to gain this level of insight without being deeply involved in the situation.

First and foremost, individuals in the workplace come together not because of their emotions. On an individual level, the primary motivation is to earn a livelihood or advance in one's career. On a collective level, the objective is to collaborate and divide labor in a manner that maximizes profits and achieves collective goals.

Secondly, in the workplace, individuals often adopt a role that differs from their true selves. This role may not align with their personal needs but rather with the requirements and expectations associated with their position.

For example, in a sales position, one would typically agree to extend the settlement cycle in order to satisfy the customer and protect their interests. However, in a finance position, one would want to shorten the settlement cycle because one is responsible for the company's cash flow. From this perspective, the goals of these two positions are contradictory, and thus the roles in these two positions are completely opposite. If the individuals in these two positions are particularly close and engage in preferential treatment, they may either be unable to collect the money in the end or the customer may leave without paying.

In terms of company management, it is not advisable for employees to form close friendships, and it is even less advisable for romantic relationships to develop in the workplace. It is expected that all employees will fulfill their responsibilities, express their own opinions, and communicate in a neutral and objective manner from their own perspective.

Furthermore, it is important to recognise that interests are also at stake in the workplace. There is a perceptive yet unflattering saying that encapsulates this reality: "There are no permanent friends or enemies, only permanent interests."

For example, when it comes to personal interests, such as a promotion, a pay rise, or a fight for scarce benefits, colleagues who usually get along well with each other may suddenly become competitors for no apparent reason. Some people will fight for the greatest possible benefits with integrity, while others will resort to unscrupulous means to do so. At this time, where is the emotion? Another example is group interests. When there is a surge in performance or a decline in performance, and rewards are handed out or responsibilities are assigned, the team will do its best to speak well of its own team in order to fight for benefits or shirk responsibilities, while at the same time sparing no effort to disparage the other team. At this time, where is the emotion?

The workplace can thus be considered a microcosm, a miniature society reflecting the collision of various human needs and interests. However, it is also a place where many people work hard, striving to achieve self-worth and to earn wealth and experience for their families and themselves.

Dear colleague, when you perceive the workplace as a negative environment, I encourage you to adopt a third-person perspective, disengage from your role, and identify the factors that contribute to others' cold and selfish behavior. By stepping back from the workplace persona and returning to your authentic self, you may find that others possess qualities worthy of appreciation.

It is important to recognize that the workplace is a neutral environment, where right and wrong are not absolute concepts. Individuals in the workplace tend to prioritize the role they play over other considerations. There are numerous desires, relationships, and interests that may be challenging to comprehend or alter, but we can alter the way we perceive these aspects. By removing the role of the workplace, we can recognize that, at their core, individuals are simply people, striving to survive and thrive, and striving to contribute to their families and society.

Bi Shumin posited that regardless of the circumstances one may face, it is imperative to maintain a resolute spirit of diligence, fortitude, and optimism.

As Romain Rolland observed, there is but one form of heroism in the world: to love life in recognition of its inherent truth.

I have been employed in this field for 18 years, and it is my hope that my response will prove beneficial to you.

Greetings, question asker. My name is Jia Ao, and I have no ulterior motives in posing this inquiry.

I have observed your request for assistance on this platform and I am grateful for your inquiry regarding the nature of workplace relationships. Despite the lack of specificity in your description, it is evident that you are grappling with a multitude of uncertainties and confusions pertaining to these relationships. I am uncertain as to whether you are a recent entrant to the workplace, struggling to navigate its intricacies, or if you have recently faced an unfavorable situation.

It is essential to undertake a comprehensive analysis and classification of the problems one is facing.

It is essential to adopt an objective and rational approach when examining problems.

In response to your inquiry, it is important to recognize that absolute truths do not exist. In the workplace, one may encounter a range of attitudes, including indifference, ruthlessness, selfishness, and power. However, these experiences can also lead to the formation of strong friendships and a sense of warmth. Every situation possesses two sides. It is essential to develop the ability to approach problems with a rational mindset.

Being isolated or ignored at work can induce feelings of discomfort. One can take a moment to compose oneself and consider the potential reasons for such behavior. Is it directed at a particular individual, or is it a more general phenomenon? Only after identifying the underlying cause can one effectively regulate one's emotions.

It is essential to learn to accept the reality of the workplace.

In the workplace, a multitude of situations may arise, and one may encounter individuals with disparate personalities. Some may offer assistance, whereas others may seek to undermine one's efforts. It is imperative to gradually acclimate to this environment, accept reality, and recognize that exclusion and isolation are common occurrences. It is crucial to maintain a positive outlook and strive for excellence in one's work, while also adapting coping strategies and fostering amicable relationships with colleagues. This approach can facilitate the acquisition of goodwill and assistance.

[Establish a positive mode of coexistence]

You indicate that you perceive a sense of selfishness and indifference in the workplace. However, this perception may be largely attributed to interactions with colleagues who engage in disruptive behavior. In most cases, individuals are simply engaged in their respective tasks and do not engage in overtly disruptive actions.

It is unclear whether your personality is introverted or extroverted. Regardless, it is advisable to attempt to establish a positive rapport with those who are different from you. When necessary, it is important to integrate into the group as much as possible. If the environment cannot be changed, one must adapt. If the other people cannot be changed, one must change oneself. Only with this kind of mentality can one get along harmoniously with others in the workplace.

[Continuously improve workplace skills]

In the context of the workplace, the ability to speak is contingent upon the demonstration of seriousness, responsibility, sincerity, down-to-earth demeanor, modesty, and kindness in one's words. Furthermore, it is imperative to recognize that the willingness to be excluded or isolated, particularly if one is perceived as overly vocal or high-profile, is an inevitable consequence of upholding these values.

Your ability to work is recognized by your leaders and colleagues, which is a more reliable indicator of success than any other factor. Instead of engaging in futile daydreaming, it is more prudent to apply oneself assiduously to enhance one's competitiveness in the workplace.

[Healing your own internal mental conflict]

Individuals who prioritize the opinions and judgments of others are more susceptible to the self-projection effect. This phenomenon leads to the perception that others are hostile, excluding, undermining, and isolating the individual in question. Consequently, the individual becomes trapped in a cyclical negative emotional state. To alter this pattern, it is essential to cultivate an accurate perception, gradually modify one's mental state, and refrain from expending energy on these negative perceptions. Self-examination is crucial to identify any tendencies towards this pattern.

It is my sincere hope that my response will prove beneficial to you and to the world at large. With love,

Greetings, inquirer!

I am pleased to have this opportunity to meet with you.

Given your experience of interacting with certain individuals in a professional setting, you have formed a negative impression of the human condition. This has led to a sense of disappointment with the broader environment of the workplace. I empathise with your situation and would like to offer you a supportive gesture.

Simultaneously, they perceive your statement as an indication that you may be experiencing difficulties in adapting to the workplace. The genuine and welcoming nature of individuals from your previous life still resonate in your memory, yet in the workplace, you encounter individuals who starkly contrast these experiences, making it challenging to reconcile the two.

It is challenging to attempt to stabilize in a novel environment when one is unable to adapt. However, it is possible to be proactive and identify strategies for doing so. Asking questions, for instance, can facilitate the discovery of an approach that aligns with one's needs more rapidly.

The phenomenon of individuals in the workplace exhibiting cold and selfish behavior is not uncommon. However, it is important to recognize that these individuals may also be struggling to communicate effectively due to a lack of understanding.

First and foremost, they are exceedingly preoccupied. Time is money, and while money may not be the primary objective, it is nevertheless the principal reason for their presence in the workplace.

Therefore, efficiency is of paramount importance, which necessitates the elimination of all superfluous, time-consuming activities. Consequently, they are unfeeling and indifferent, regarding every word as a luxury. It is therefore unsurprising that communication and emotion are absent.

Secondly, they are optimizing value in their own way. Therefore, they must respond to others with the most indifferent words to prevent others from continuing to inquire and affect their subsequent task.

It is understandable that they may appear selfish.

It is possible that they were not like this when they first entered the workplace. However, after experiencing a few losses due to their own gentle and kind words, they have become adept at navigating the workplace.

I will refrain from listing any further examples. The prevailing culture of the workplace has remained consistent over time, and there are logical reasons for its continued existence.

In point of fact, individuals in the workplace are similar to us in many ways. They are simply situated in an environment where they must navigate numerous responsibilities, including the pursuit of financial sustenance. Ultimately, they prioritize their work.

Given your status as a recent arrival at the workplace, it is understandable that you may experience some difficulty in adapting. However, it is important to recognize that we all face similar challenges and that treating others with sincerity and respect can foster connections with individuals who share similar values. Additionally, it is beneficial to engage in social activities with colleagues outside of work to gain a deeper understanding of their personalities and perspectives.

I am an enthusiastic answerer and listening expert at Yixinli. I endeavor to expand my knowledge to better navigate life's challenges and distill my experiences to assist others. I hope I can be of service to you.