Hello, question asker!
After reading your question, I was really struck by how similar it is to my own confusion when I was young.
I'd love to share my understanding with you, and I hope it will be a little inspiring!
1. It's so important to understand ourselves!
When you meet a guy like this, it can be a little confusing, right?
On the one hand, he's taking the initiative to chat with you, sharing his daily life and telling you everything.
On the other hand, he has a girlfriend and will send you things about her, as well as photos of girls he finds attractive.
I totally get it. If it were me, I wouldn't understand what he was thinking either.
He sometimes takes a little while to reply.
We're not him, and sometimes we just can't know what he's really thinking.
But that's okay, sweetheart.
We can take a look at your interactions from our own perspective, if you'd like.
For example, he trusts you and is happy to share things with you. In his eyes, you're a really special friend who makes him feel at ease.
Maybe you feel seen and noticed in this relationship, too!
It's not so much about understanding what the other person is thinking, but more about understanding what you're thinking.
For example, he brings you a certain kind of satisfaction, and you are happy to maintain this kind of relationship with him.
Or he'll help you see boys in a whole new light. You'll realize there's so much more to them than you ever imagined!
So, it's really important to understand ourselves!
If he feels happy and satisfied with himself, and he feels at ease with him even though he feels misunderstood, then he can respect his own feelings and listen to his heart to find a comfortable way to get along with him.
2. We'll all gain something from interacting with others!
Adlerian psychology says that making friends is a really important part of life.
We're all in this together!
On the other hand, though, making friends can also lead to various problems.
And we'll meet all kinds of different people!
We all have doubts and worries from time to time.
But if we are willing to think about it or feel it seriously in such a relationship, we will definitely reap some great benefits!
So, if you're looking for a partner in the future, what kind of partner are you looking for?
I'd love to know what kind of interaction you're willing to maintain with your partner!
And of course, you might want to think about whether you'd like your partner to have frequent contact with other members of the opposite sex, and so on.
It's so important to remember that a good relationship is something that should be mutually beneficial.
If a relationship is draining for you, please don't hesitate to tell us. We're here to help!
Every relationship is so meaningful when we interact with real people!
It can really help us think and grow!
Some relationships just naturally fade or come to an end over time, while others last a long, long time.
When we need it, we can have companionship, comfort, freedom, and so on. And that's a wonderful thing!
These interactions will help us to understand what we value, what we like, and what kind of relationship makes us feel at ease and happy.
Dear questioner,
I truly believe you will slowly find your own answers.
Sometimes, you can even try asking the other person directly about anything you're not sure about.
Who knows, we might even see more!
Please feel free to share these with anyone you think might benefit from them.
If you're interested, I'd love for you to read "The Courage to Be Happy."
Wishing you all the best!
Comments
I get what you're saying. It seems like he values your friendship and maybe uses you as a confidant to talk about his life, including his relationships and experiences. He might feel comfortable sharing these things with someone who won't judge him. As for the pictures of handsome guys you send, it could be that he doesn't know how to respond or simply isn't interested in engaging with that content.
It sounds complicated. He could be using you as an outlet to boost his ego by bragging about his social success and dating life. It's puzzling why he shares so much yet doesn't reciprocate when you show interest in something similar. Maybe he sees this dynamic as harmless fun but from your perspective, it might feel unbalanced or even a bit frustrating.
He may just be very open with you because he feels safe talking about everything without any strings attached. However, it's important to consider how this makes you feel. If it's not fulfilling for you or if you feel used, it might be worth setting boundaries or discussing your feelings directly with him.